Bananarama By wtfisthisworldcomingto - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff Today, I was mugged. The guy mugging me was eating a banana. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 883 You deserved it 7 510 Share Tweet Share
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he "couldn't handle the distance." He said he "couldn't commit to driving to see me long term." We live two hours apart, and I've driven to him every time; he never tried to come to me once. FML I agree, your life sucks 898 You deserved it 159
Today, my family’s usual Sunday dinner turned into a shouting match over politics. My uncle called me a “brainwashed socialist,” my cousin accused me of being a “capitalist pig,” and my grandma just sat there eating pie, which made me want to call her a "fence-sitting centrist", which is when I realized that maybe we shouldn't ever talk about politics again. FML I agree, your life sucks 147 You deserved it 474
Today, I was in the car hooking up with my boyfriend. He was on top of me when I noticed my neighbor jogging toward the car. Instead of hiding, I felt compelled to wave as he jogged past us. FML I agree, your life sucks 8 690 You deserved it 43 233
Today, my father decided that since I'm 21 and have never had a girlfriend, he would buy me a book on how to talk to girls. The book was written by a 9 year-old kid. FML I agree, your life sucks 33 669 You deserved it 6 830
Today, my thundercunt of a neighbor, who's hated me since I moved in, called the cops on me. He told them he saw me shooting up on drugs. I'm diabetic and was injecting insulin, which he could only have seen by spying on me through my living room window. FML I agree, your life sucks 38 025 You deserved it 2 231
Today, I am 8 weeks pregnant. I have debilitating 'morning sickness' all day. And now I get to add peeing my pants every time I throw up. FML I agree, your life sucks 31 701 You deserved it 4 984
did he stab you with the banana?
That's important information. Tell the cops to search for banana breath.