Animals Bad boy - FML

Bad boy

sandra - 20/09/2010 06:13 - United States

Today, I was working with some shelter puppies transporting them to the vet's. I got all of the puppies in but one, and when I went to pull him out, I realized he had gotten car sick. Before I could stop it happening, he wagged his vomit-covered tail and hit me in the face. FML

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Anonymous - 26/02/2017 19:00 - United States - Shreveport

Today, while at work for a dog groomer, I picked up a new puppy that came in for a groom. I held it up at face level with me, baby talking it, when it promptly began peeing. Luckily, it didn't get on my clothes. Unluckily, it got onto my face and into my mouth. FML

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Annie - 22/11/2009 22:07 - Mexico

Today, I noticed that my dog was feeling sad. I let him hop on my bed with me to make him feel better. It worked, right after he vomited all over my face and pillow. FML

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killjoyx - 23/07/2015 18:28 - United States - Suffolk

Today, when I woke up, my dog excitedly came up to me and licked my face. A few minutes later, I find out he had thrown up twice before he licked my face. FML

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Dogmom - 18/12/2018 17:30

Today, I couldn’t tell that my puppy had an upset stomach before I left for work. I came home to her covered in shit inside her crate. After cleaning her up and almost being done with the mess, my husband found where she had tried to lick herself clean and then vomited it up in our bedroom. FML

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SHIT-BREATH - 05/06/2013 16:03 - United Kingdom - Chepstow

Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

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Puppysit88 - 16/04/2009 21:36 - United States

Today, I was petsitting for my neighbor's new puppy. A huge thunderstorm came, and the puppy started whining and shivering violently. I pulled it into my lap to try and comfort it. One loud clap of thunder later, and the puppy had explosive diarrhea all over me. FML

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Anonymous - 18/09/2015 21:14 - United States - Jonesboro

Today, at the small daycare I run, I turned around to put something away. I heard a splashing sound and then saw one of my kids vomiting. He puked several times, and managed to hit the only rug in the entire house. FML

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WolfieJL - 18/05/2014 07:51 - United States

Today, my two year-old puked in the backseat of the car. When we stopped to clean her up, she scooped up the vomit by the handful and threw it at my head. I had an almost two-hour drive before I could wash the smell off myself. FML

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StinkyDogs - 27/03/2011 10:06 - United States

Today, on the way home from the dog groomer, my great Dane had a bout of diarrhea in the car. I slammed on the brakes and my other freshly shampooed dog slid off the seat and into the pile of crap. FML

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mew - 25/10/2011 18:04 - Canada

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

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iltby 3

Monday 20 September 2010 12:36

That's rescue work for you. Good on you anyway.

dickster 0

Monday 20 September 2010 12:28

At least he was cute?

ken328 0

Monday 20 September 2010 16:37

awww it loves you <3

misslizz327 0

Monday 20 September 2010 17:12

awww thats so sweet that you volunteer like that. thank u

Independantlove 0

Monday 20 September 2010 17:14

nom nom nom ;) sucks 2 be u! but come on, it's not THAT bad think about it. mothers get barfed on daily for the first 4 years of their kids life xD

SAMHAlN 0

Monday 20 September 2010 19:05

beat it to death

skyeyez9 24

Monday 20 September 2010 20:16

My dog barfed inside my new car once: it landed in between the passenger seat and center console.

Einstein714 0

Monday 20 September 2010 21:54

kinda harsh with the bitch comment, I bet she's sweet.

pinktink91 0

Monday 20 September 2010 22:11

at least it was from a cute puppy, right?

SkullCanddi 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 1:31

Well At Least He Was Happy To See You(:

fullmetalshrimp 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 2:44

Beats human puke. I'd prefer dog puke over human's any day. Just saying. xD

nikki9tails 3

Wednesday 22 September 2010 9:17

dogs roll around walk around anything is possible dogs can be messy lol

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I spent the busiest travel day of the year in the busiest airport in the world trapped between the decision to leave the terminal bathroom or shit my pants. Yes, I missed my flight. Sorry, mom. FML

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Today, the landlord of our building constructed a bathroom in the space under the stairs, outside my office, on the other side of a thin wall. He must have some kind of bowel disorder, because now I get to hear the sounds of his loud, wet and gassy pooping several times per day. FML

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Today, I surprised my girlfriend with rose petals on the bed. Romantic, right? Turns out, the roses I'd bought had been sprayed with some sort of red dye. The petals stained the sheets, my hands, and our white-furred cat, who now looks like a tiny crime scene victim. FML

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Today, my now-ex-fiance told me he’s leaving me for his pregnant coworker. The baby is his. The same coworker he assured me was just a "professional platonic friendship." Our wedding was set to be this Saturday. FML

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Today, I went to a restaurant and asked for vegetarian options. They told me, "We have a chicken Caesar salad, will that work?" FML

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Today, I had depressive feelings, so I decided to write about it to find out what was bothering me, and let go of the negative thoughts. While doing so, I had a panic attack. FML

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