Kids, Painful Gun control 1, 2, 3… FIRE! - FML

1, 2, 3… FIRE!

Username - 11/08/2011 04:53 - United States

Today, I walked out of my house wearing only boxers, only to be greeted by kids with paintball guns. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Defense!

ruined_suit - 17/04/2009 21:12 - United States

Today, I came home from work to find that my neighbor's trash bins were still on the curb. While returning the bins to her backyard, her kid ran out and shot me with a paintball gun. Multiple times. He thought I was a burglar and ruined my new suit. FML

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walllflower - 08/02/2015 19:46 - Canada - Saint Catharines

Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML

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Get off my lawn!

Anonymous - 29/08/2020 14:09

Today, the police came to my house and arrested me. Why? The neighborhood kids thought it would be fun to hide behind my house and shoot at people with paintball guns. People saw it coming from my house and called the police. I was fired from work, due to missing it without notice. No excuses. FML

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Anonymous - 12/06/2013 18:39 - United States - Noblesville

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

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nl4 - 01/11/2013 23:55 - Israel - Tel Aviv

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

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Z - 26/11/2012 10:26 - Australia

Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML

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Risky

Josh - 13/10/2023 16:00 - United States

Today, I thought it would be fun to join my friends for a game of paintball. I got shot in the same spot three times in a row. It turned out to be my own team, who mistook me for the enemy because I was wearing… camouflage. FML

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awesomekidsmum - 18/09/2011 01:20 - Canada

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

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BOHICA123 - 08/10/2013 02:08 - United States - Brighton

Today, being so desperate for money, I accepted a job in which I get shot at with paintballs for 6 hours. FML

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clumsylobster - 13/10/2014 21:33 - Australia - Perth

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

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unfortunate_13 5

Thursday 11 August 2011 12:07

blue balls!

SirBedevere 0

Thursday 11 August 2011 12:19

Should've torn off your boxers and charged at them.

hi5534 3

Thursday 11 August 2011 17:51

now get the 12 gauge and call them back >:D

DistanceNow 0

Friday 12 August 2011 8:50

Thats what I did few.weeks back!!!! I walked outside, saw kids shooting, back inside for my 12 ga. Loaded with flechet shells and unloaded. I didnt get in trouble though cause TEXAS LAW IS AWESOME.

xGolBLiiN 1

Thursday 11 August 2011 17:57

I am a big paintball player on a team and all and what i know is that paintball in public like that is illegal and also it hurts!

Holy_ish 19

Thursday 11 August 2011 18:10

lol i know how that feels

buttercupp2137 0

Thursday 11 August 2011 18:17

This is why my sister will never get one.

Friaza 29

Thursday 11 August 2011 18:49

Check Mate.

GoneClubbin 9

Thursday 11 August 2011 18:50

why... did you walk outside in your boxers?

beetboxboy 9

Friday 12 August 2011 6:21

He likes the breeeze

Daederoth 10

Thursday 11 August 2011 20:05

This is the closest posting between FYL and YDI I've seen.

ArsenalFan12 0

Thursday 11 August 2011 20:23

the solution is easy. run!

flipnazn 1

Thursday 11 August 2011 20:25

Is it normal for you to be around kids in your underwear?

Hald 10

Thursday 11 August 2011 20:57

What kind of sick parent allows kids to play with "guns"?? War isn't funny, why entertain your kids with war-games?

twisted54 1

Thursday 11 August 2011 22:50

To get them prepared for the revolution. Geez...

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Today, I had a horribly realistic dream where I was being robbed and had to swallow my wedding ring to save it. After waking up, I realized my wedding ring is in fact gone. The doctor assures me that I will have it back in a day or two. FML

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Today, my mom finally believed me when I said I smelled mold. I lifted up the couch, and it was covered in mold. So were the bottoms of all our furniture, our beds, and my grandma's vintage chair. We've been living in mold for the past 4 months. FML

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Today, I received a friend request from a boyfriend I hadn't talked to in 20+ years. A few minutes later, he messaged me a picture of himself with a young woman at a strip club. My daughter. FML

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Today, my mother started fostering a child to make some money. I wouldn't have a problem with this if she didn't make me babysit the kid and take him to and from school every day because she's "too busy". I work full-time and she's unemployed. FML

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Today, I realized just how clingy my boyfriend is, when he pulled out in the middle of sex, lay down and hugged me, and said in his "adorable" voice that he didn't really want to have sex, but cuddle. I wouldn't mind if it didn't happen so often. FML

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