Work

By pabj208 - 06/03/2015 00:07 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, during a meal out with my team and bosses, I wasn't drinking. The waiter complained, "If you're not ordering alcohol, how am I supposed to take advantage of you later?" I'm not sure what's worse, the rapey pre-dinner joke or the awkward silence as my colleagues looked on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 935

You deserved it 2 517

pabj208 tells us more.

pabj208 23

Friday 6 March 2015 19:16

OP here. Thanks for the comments everyone, you'll be pleased to hear that today I did phone up the restaurant posing as 'a member of the girl's team' (which is technically true), as I didn't want to identify myself. I can take a bit of banter as much as the next person, and although I'm sure it was meant as a joke, it certainly crossed a line. I thought I'd say something to his manager in case he repeated his actions to someone less capable of standing up for themselves than me! You never know who he might try it with again... The (female) owner was horrified and said she was furious with the waiter, who had apparently worked there for 20 years. She'll be having a chat with him later on and offered me and 'the girl' (also me!) a free pizza each. I don't think I'll be taking them up on the offer! Oh, and my team were lovely about it- after the shocked silence they all agreed that he crossed a line and were very supportive :)

By phishy - 05/03/2015 22:26 - United States - Georgetown

Today, I got a call from a potential employer. Unfortunately, I couldn't understand the man due to his incoherent mumbling. I had to decline the job after asking him to repeat everything he said, over and over again. I still don't know exactly which job I declined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 240

You deserved it 2 492

By Completely Innocent - 05/03/2015 17:10 - United States

Today, a coworker told my manager that I and another girl were plotting to get her fired at the end of the month. She actually believed her. Now we're suspended without pay for two weeks for conspiracy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 594

You deserved it 2 853

Long goodbye

By Kali - 04/03/2015 00:28 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I got a call from a potential employer. They spent five minutes explaining job duties and I listened with anticipation. Then they spent five minutes explaining why I wasn't the right person for the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 191

You deserved it 2 295

By miewann - 03/03/2015 19:06 - United States - Mount Holly

Today, I got fired from my new waitress job after 2 shifts. They said I wasn't experienced enough to handle the fast pace. I thought I'd been doing well so I asked my friend who works there what really happened. Apparently not showing my boobs enough at a family place was grounds for dismissal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 220

You deserved it 2 572

By badtiming - 03/03/2015 17:18 - Brazil - Rio De Janeiro

Today, I received a rejection letter from a job I desperately wanted. Yesterday, the job offer I'd been stalling on in while waiting for news about this one expired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 347

You deserved it 9 995

By soconfused - 03/03/2015 10:15 - United Kingdom - Belfast

Today, I have been at my new job for almost a month and still have no idea what I'm doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 363

You deserved it 11 510

By dontplaywithmyfeelings - 03/03/2015 01:42 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I got a new job and told everyone about it. A few hours later, I got an email from the executive saying I actually don't have the job anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 827

You deserved it 2 743

By kysier - 01/03/2015 23:36 - United States - Campbellsville

Today, I was turned down from the dream job that I was promised two years ago, once my chemo and radiation therapy was finished. His excuse? He never actually expected me to survive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 463

You deserved it 2 436

Too late

By Anonymous - 01/03/2015 13:31 - United Kingdom - Guildford

Today, while on the train heading to my new job, my coat caught between two seats. I didn't notice until my stop. I whacked myself in the face in front of everyone trying to get it free, and ended up missing my stop. When I finally got to work, I was told not to bother coming in again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 445

You deserved it 2 799

By mags89 - 25/02/2015 14:18 - United States

Today, my boss used Siri to settle a debate we were having in our team meeting. Siri responded by calling him "Daddy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 417

You deserved it 3 628

mags89 tells us more.

mags89 10

Thursday 26 February 2015 0:46

He's divorced and has three kids. All grown. He set it that way himself. He was a pretty good sport though and everyone laughed about it.

Dingus friends

By Anonymous - 25/02/2015 11:51 - United Kingdom

Today, I was telling my friends that I'd gotten a paid position to cover a worker's bereavement leave for the next three weeks. They then called me an insensitive bitch for "profiting from someone else's misfortune." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 644

You deserved it 2 859

By ruthlessrobin - 25/02/2015 06:31 - United States - Pittsburg

Today, I was given my yearly evaluation as a cake decorator at Walmart. They said I "was easily the best decorator there" and "the bakery has definitely improved since I got there." In the same conversation they put "unsatisfactory" on my evaluation and denied my raise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 321

You deserved it 2 470

ruthlessrobin tells us more.

ruthlessrobin 9

Wednesday 25 February 2015 19:05

I went to the store manager who said "what do you expect? You don't make 22 cakes a day." That level is for mass production I am put on specialty orders 90% of the time. He didn't care

Bossman

By O…… - 24/02/2015 10:19 - Sweden

Today, my boss called me, furious about how I "never answer my phone", especially when important clients are trying to reach me, and how unprofessional I am. I make very sure to never miss any calls, my boss just keeps giving out the wrong number to people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 468

You deserved it 2 019

By now what - 23/02/2015 23:52 - Canada

Today, I got laid off. I abandoned my friends, my boyfriend and moved 10 hours away for this job because my uncle convinced me to. My uncle is my employer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 137

You deserved it 4 887

By Confused and Disgusted - 23/02/2015 23:42 - United States - Sparta

Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 312

You deserved it 2 447

Suspicion

By vaylosa - 22/02/2015 20:36

Today, I decided to go all-natural and go to work without any makeup on. My boss swore I was on drugs, which I guess had absolutely nothing to do with the completely "random" drug test I had to take later in the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 595

You deserved it 3 622

By besosforme - 21/02/2015 04:17 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I noticed our weekly biohazardous waste pickup didn't occur as usual at the surgery center where I work. After calling, the company informed me they were short staffed and couldn't make it out 'til next week. Guess that amputated finger is just going to marinate another week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 856

You deserved it 2 302

besosforme tells us more.

besosforme 26

Saturday 21 February 2015 22:08

Actually... It was! I'm thinking about breaking the contract with this company (after they pick up the finger- and the rest of the waste, of course). They've been nothing but unreliable and difficult to work with.

By blahblah1993 - 20/02/2015 17:56 - United States - Katy

Today, I'm 8 months pregnant and still waitressing at a local restaurant. There were only 3 of us serving today and things were hectic. One guy bitched me out, saying "Maybe if you lost some weight you'd walk a little faster!" because I wasn't fast enough with his soup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 166

You deserved it 2 844

By Taylor Page - 19/02/2015 16:24 - United States - Gainesville

Today, my boss used the restroom at work. She returned and told me I needed to go clean the toilet because "someone left a mess in there." It was her mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 638

You deserved it 2 540

One of those people

By Vercsi - 19/02/2015 15:47 - United Kingdom - Newcastle Upon Tyne

Today, my attention-seeking, insanely thick co-worker explained that due to her new diet she can't eat bread. She "can eat pizza" though. When we pointed out that they’re pretty much made of the same ingredients, she wouldn’t believe us. I sit right behind this idiot every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 333

You deserved it 2 768

Nice try…

By Anonymous - 18/02/2015 18:06 - United Kingdom - Norwich

Today, I tried to blackmail my douchebag boss for a raise, since I had ample proof that he's screwing a co-worker. Turns out he and his wife are in an open relationship, and HR doesn't give a damn about office romances. Now I have to quit or deal with the most hostile work environment ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 480

You deserved it 64 439

Who am I?

By lonergirl - 18/02/2015 12:35 - Australia

Today, after being with the company for over 3 years, I realised nobody really knows my name. This was after my boss was walking around a new staff member and couldn't introduce me. Neither could my colleague, who's been sitting next to me for the last 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 188

You deserved it 3 961

By chloe_zjk - 18/02/2015 05:22 - France

Today, I'm an intern working in a company's reception area, which happens to have a coffee dispenser. As I'm the new girl, every client getting coffee wants to buy me one. I'm too polite to say no. It's 10:26 AM, and I'm on cup #17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 717

You deserved it 12 238

By Anonymous - 17/02/2015 17:42

Today, I've been freezing in my office for days at work. When I finally complained about it to a coworker, she led me into my office, said, "Let me show you something," then pointed out the thermostat I'd never noticed was even there and turned it up with a pitying look. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 624

You deserved it 26 718

By LP - 16/02/2015 03:25 - United States - Madison

Today, I was at work copying some papers. The copier is below a shelf with lots of paper and signage, which suddenly flew off the hinge and hit me in the head as well as the copier. My boss ran in, asking, "Is the copier okay?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 639

You deserved it 2 382

By anonymous - 15/02/2015 22:39 - United States - Valdosta

Today, while working at Subway I joked with a customer asking him if he was going to order in Spanish. The women in front of him began yelling about how I was being racist and told my manager that I needed to be fired. The customer I was joking with was my Spanish teacher. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 012

You deserved it 2 918

By Anonynonynon - 13/02/2015 19:05 - United States - Kansas City

Today, I'm working for a company that makes over a million dollars a year, yet leaves me with no choice but to pee in a cup because they won't pay to fix the only toilet in the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 827

You deserved it 2 461

By lizzie57 - 13/02/2015 12:09 - United Kingdom

Today, as a reward for finishing all my work in maths, I was told I could leave early. Apparently, later on, the class had a random attendance inspection. I didn't know about this until I received a detention for not being present at that class. My teacher had completely forgotten about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 941

You deserved it 2 734

lizzie57 tells us more.

lizzie57 19

Saturday 14 February 2015 1:34

Hi, OP here. Thanks for the comments, so happy this got published and the maths jokes made me laugh :) to people questioning the random attendance inspections - my school has really bad attendance generally so we get them to try and scare us into coming more. I did talk to my teacher and he spoke to the office and explained the situation and they let me off :) so alls well that ends well I suppose. I was just a bit annoyed at my teacher forgetting me! But bless him he was very apologetic. Anyway, thats me explained :)