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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Scary

    Worst enemy

    By vitalcheese - 20/05/2009 19:12 - United States

    Today, I was walking around my house without a shirt on after my shower. I picked up my cat and walked around the corner… Just as my dad turned on the vacuum. Now I have 6 rather deep bloody holes in my shoulder and chest. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 46 194
    You deserved it 8 229
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    Stealth mode

    By Slipperywhenwet - 28/02/2009 13:08 - United States

    Today, I was stepping out of the shower while home alone. I heard voices coming from the living room. I grabbed a bat to defend myself and ran into the living room. I slipped on my tile floor and smashed my TV with the bat. No one was in my house, but I'd left the radio on. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 20 640
    You deserved it 48 184
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    Bath time [GONE WRONG][CREEPYPASTA]

    By noname - 27/12/2008 04:07 - France

    Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 40 319
    You deserved it 23 924
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    Keywords

    Embarrassing Clothes Awkward Work Family Kids Public freakouts Love Break-ups Addiction Scary Health Sex Pregnancy Intimacy Friends Miscellaneous Pranks Weird Music Bodyshaming Healthy Lifestyle Allergies Annoying Dogs Messy Animals Cute Moving home ACAB
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    Today, I called my sister to wish her a happy birthday. I sang the Birthday song off-key but in a spirited way, before she interrupted to say, “My birthday was yesterday.” She then added, “By the way, your ex remembered, and I think we're besties now.” FML
    I agree, your life sucks 137
    You deserved it 526
    Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 57 061
    You deserved it 6 562
    Today it's my twin brother's and my birthday, and like every year people wish him a happy birthday instead of me. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 921
    You deserved it 116
    Today, I adopted my second dog. When I called to tell my mom about it, she sternly told me that I was not allowed to get any more dogs. I'm 28 and own my own house. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 11 546
    You deserved it 1 034
    Today, I have a permanent illness. Whenever I'm too unwell to manage the housework or children, my hubby does even less than usual. As soon as I'm well enough, I have a mountain of work to do, which makes me sick again. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 171
    You deserved it 144
    Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 39 175
    You deserved it 6 023
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