Music

By Anonymous - 27/06/2019 16:34

Today, my 7-year-old learned "Smoke Weed Everyday" from YouTube, and has repeated it so many times that I'm now singing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 413

You deserved it 459

Musical exploration

By Anonymous - 30/11/2023 07:30

Today, after I tried to create the perfect playlist for a road trip, my music app decided to shuffle exclusively between sea shanties and children's nursery rhymes, turning my drive into a surreal musical adventure that left me questioning the algorithm's sense of humor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 394

You deserved it 205

Mixed signals, mixed results

By Anonymous - 07/09/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom - Doncaster

Today, the guy I'm in love with invited me out to a gig with him and his friends, only to then try to set me up with his friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 430

You deserved it 131

Classic story

By Anonymous - 06/04/2021 16:00 - United States - Wilton

Today, I’m getting so old that the local radio station that plays the “old classics” is playing songs I listened to in high school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 180

Jam it in my ears

By missmom83 - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Torrington

Today, my toddler found my daughter's recorder from third grade and figured out how to play the highest-pitched note. Of course, my daughter pulls out her trombone to have a jam session. And I'm out of Ibuprofen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 611

You deserved it 5 676

Voice of a generation

By Stevie - 29/09/2024 06:00 - Portugal - Lisbon

Today, I was belting out Beyoncé in the shower, really feeling myself. When I got out, I heard applause. My new neighbors were sitting on their balcony and I had my bedroom window open. They'd been unwilling members of my entire shower performance's audience, and the applause was definitely sarcastic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 420

Encourage your kids, damn asshats!

By The bassist - 17/05/2021 04:01

Today, months after buying my first bass guitar and taking bass lessons using my own money, I realized that my parents refused to buy me an instrument, claiming that I sucked at it. What actually happened is that they didn't feel like paying for some "teenage bullshit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 896

You deserved it 170

Rock n roll star

By MarsMayFall - 12/09/2016 09:56 - United States

Today, I was performing for a fairly large crowd with my band. I decided it would look cool to stand on one of the speakers and sing from there. It did look pretty cool for a bit until I tried to step off and fell face-first on the floor mid-song. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 872

You deserved it 6 723

Don't accept every dare

By wheezy - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to go to the hospital to get a harmonica removed from my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 205

You deserved it 28 825

Tour van aroma

By Anonymous - 30/12/2014 04:17 - United States - Richardson

Today, our band had a road trip. Two people chose to stack themselves on top of each other to share a seat rather than sit in the last seat next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 031

You deserved it 3 296

Opportunity knocks

By fuckyou - 21/05/2019 06:00

Today, my girlfriend took me to see my favorite band live. Afterwards, we were lucky enough to run into the lead guitarist, who promptly asked her if she'd like to go back to his hotel room. She accepted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 130

You deserved it 232

Grease is the word

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was Rizzo in a production of Grease. I sang a line about needing a ring. I've been able to put up my left ring finger for every rehearsal, but today I put up the one next to it. I flipped off the audience. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 831

You deserved it 24 639

The Voice

By Anonymous - 06/09/2021 05:01

Today, my boyfriend took our dog to the vet because he heard him whining in pain this morning. It was actually me singing in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 295

The Voice

By Ellie - 08/05/2012 05:05 - United States

Today, I was practicing for a choir concert that I have next week. My mom walked into my room and listened to me for a little while. After I finished the last song, she smiled, patted me on the head and said, "It's okay honey, I can't sing either." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 950

You deserved it 2 986

The simple life

By swervelol - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, as well as for the past two weeks, my brother has been making up songs about farts and singing them non-stop. He's 26. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 036

You deserved it 1 171

Rock on!

By Anonymous - 16/06/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, ever supportive of my friends, I went to a concert and tried to really get into the music. I was jumping and dancing, only to realize I was at the wrong concert. My friend's band was playing next door. I spent half an hour dancing with strangers to music I didn't even really like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 563

By Anonymous - 06/06/2012 18:21 - United States

Today, I pulled a neck muscle while head-banging. I wasn't at a concert, and I'm not in a heavy metal band, but I do pretend that I am while I'm in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 597

You deserved it 24 406

So exotic

By Anonymous - 13/02/2022 11:59 - United States - Marquette

Today, my mother met a new member of my band. He's a piano player from Mexico City. She introduced herself as my mother, then asked him if he spoke Spanish or Mexican. This lead to a long talk about how they speak Spanish in Mexico too. She didn’t believe him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 041

You deserved it 118

Extended play

By Not a babysitter - 09/02/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I taught a kid piano for a two hour lesson. The mom left to do some errands, and by the time two hours was up, she texted me asking to watch the kid for another "15 minutes" while she returned home. No problem, she had the money too, so I stayed. Four hours later, she showed up, and refused to pay me extra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 750

You deserved it 130

It's still a bop! It slaps!

By Please find a new song - 20/11/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I was once again woken up to my dad blasting The Beatles' song "Birthday." He does this whenever it's anyone's birthday (in this case, my mom's) and he knows a lot of people. It was funny at first, but now it's getting old very quickly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 101

Boom boom boom

By Anonymous - 24/03/2023 16:00 - Australia

Today, I finally had some alone time to relax and watch a movie. As soon as I pressed play, my neighbor started blasting their music so loud I could feel the bass in my chest. I tried calling the landlord, but they didn't answer. I ended up watching the movie with subtitles while listening to my neighbor's music. FML

I agree, your life sucks 915

You deserved it 132

Rock on, dude

By sammers27 - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Scottsdale

Today, a weird guy in pajama pants and a fake hair-hat kept standing by us at a concert. Everyone talked about what a creep he was. I would have too, but he was my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 561

You deserved it 4 958

Rock n roll

By notanybetter - 08/06/2019 02:00

Today, the drummer from my favorite band threw a drumstick into the crowd during a concert. It hit me on the head and bounced into my friend's hands. She left with a drumstick from a band she didn't want to see in the first place. I left with a bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 658

You deserved it 176

Free Jazz

By Greg Towers - 30/01/2024 03:00 - United States - Plymouth Meeting

Today, I had to blow my nose at a jazz jam session. I blew my nose so hard that I blew the major third over a minor chord and everyone started throwing full bottles of beer at me. Fuck you. FML

I agree, your life sucks 185

You deserved it 430

Got talent?

By Anonymous - 21/09/2013 20:56 - United States - Collingswood

Today, I told my mom that I want to try out for a singing competition on TV, so I might be able to kick off my musical career. She convinced me to sing a song for her, so I did. Mid-way through, she lost it, burst into laughter, and told me to stay in school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 982

You deserved it 12 249

Don't do this

By storksleuth - 04/10/2011 08:57 - United States

Today, I saw a girl wearing a Nirvana shirt. Since Nirvana has been my favorite band for a long time, I tried striking up a conversation with her. Turns out she doesn't even listen to them, and only bought the shirt because she "liked the smiley face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 964

You deserved it 5 625

It's a wrap

By victoria - 04/04/2021 21:30

Today, I had a school band concert in which I was doing a clarinet solo. I had a Laffy Taffy before the concert. Little did I know part of the wrapper got stuck in my hair. I went through the whole concert like that and I was so embarrassed when I found out afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 301

He's the boss

By Anonymous - 01/03/2023 00:00

Today, I lost my earbuds on the subway to work, so I had to listen to my boss's terrible music all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 632

You deserved it 227

Don't think so highly of yourself

By Book by its cover - 08/10/2022 10:00 - United States - Federal Way

Today, I was in an elevator when some awkward geeky-looking guy walked in. He asked me how my day was, but I said, “You’re not my type, don’t even try.” An hour later, I was at a concert. Turns out he was the lead singer of the opening band. He glared at me angrily when he noticed me in the crowd. FML

I agree, your life sucks 180

You deserved it 3 123

Warren Zevon wrote bangers

By The song is "Excitable Boy" - 02/01/2023 20:00 - United States

Today, I've been trying to find and revisit a song that my dad listened to all the time when I was a kid, and I finally found it. Except now I'm old enough to realize the lyrics are about a psychotic man who gets put in a "home" for things I cannot put in here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 145

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The Top

Today, while lying in bed, my boyfriend reached over and pinched my love handles and said "Where did this muffin top come from?". Then he sang "Do you know the muffin man?" to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 831

You deserved it 8 162

Today, I helped myself to some homemade biscuits that had been left in the kitchen. I thought they looked a little odd, but they tasted pretty good. I found out later they were homemade dog treats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 510

You deserved it 30 671

Today, I wore the belt that my stepfather has spent 2 months needle pointing, as a finishing touch he added my initials: 'fml'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 378

You deserved it 5 367

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend’s birthday is a month before mine. I'd spent my birthday savings on his, but he told me that we couldn’t do anything for mine because, “I didn’t plan or organize better.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 040

You deserved it 150

Today, I had to explain to my 27 year-old sister why a stainless steel fork isn't a good toy for my 8 month-old baby. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 069

You deserved it 1 679

Today, no matter how hard I work, no matter what my position is, and how hard I have earned it, I will keep failing, knowing that the people who succeed won't do a thing to focus directly on advancing or substantially improving human life quality. I will be the last one to consider it, but will never be able to do a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 159

You deserved it 370