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Ahay's favorite FMLs

By Hotsauce887 - 29/03/2009 21:08 - United States

Today, my friend told the cute waiter it was my birthday. He brought out a dessert with a candle and put a huge sombrero on my head. Everyone at the restaurant started singing me happy birthday. I got embarrassed and put my head down. My sombrero caught on fire. FML

agreeclassic 70 287

vote type 1 25 661

By Anonymous - 02/05/2013 16:49 - United States

Today, my sister texted me, saying she was about to go into surgery. It's been a long time coming, and we've both been worried about what could happen. I texted "good luck" back. My phone autocorrected it to "goodbye" and I didn't even notice. FML

agreeclassic 59 290

vote type 1 8 250

By anonymous - 27/03/2013 23:55 - United States - Honolulu

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

agreeclassic 89 227

vote type 1 9 267

By Kallian - 16/01/2013 23:22 - United States

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

agreeclassic 37 103

vote type 1 2 680

Kallian_fml app_comment_confession_title

Kallian_fml 21

Thursday 17 January 2013 8:54

I don't think it's getting any better... And I can't believe I forgot to sign into my account when I submitted this.

Thanks, I hate it!

By Dimples - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Sanford

Today, I was at a café with my friends when an elderly man noticed my dimples. He came up to me, stroked them while whispering, "One in a million" then walked out. Now my friends do this to me constantly, even while driving home. I almost hit a tree. FML

agreeclassic 38 904

vote type 1 3 534