volgin95

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New York, America
32 years-old
Wednesday 04 August 1993
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Volgin95's favorite FMLs

Fountainhead

By iliketurtles - 24/02/2009 22:57 - United States

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

agreeclassic 63 366

vote type 1 7 783

By Anonymous - 06/12/2011 06:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have a girlfriend, saying, "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one" is not the best way to proceed. FML

agreeclassic 12 065

vote type 1 76 138

By Cecilly2010 - 28/04/2011 15:53

Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML

agreeclassic 50 689

vote type 1 5 311

Real smooth

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I finally got the courage to talk to a guy I secretly like. I was so nervous that instead of saying, "Hi, I'm Veronica," I said, "Veronica, I'm high." FML

agreeclassic 37 672

vote type 1 8 623

Back to square one

By nurseITHINKNOT - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I finally started my job as an in-home caregiver. The man I was hired to care for died two hours after I made it to his house. FML

agreeclassic 47 826

vote type 1 3 964