kkillaj

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Kkillaj's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 16/12/2011 03:55 - United States

Today, I'd had it with my mom's addiction to weed, so I told her to choose between me or the weed. I'm currently looking on Craigslist for an apartment. FML

agreeclassic 40 051

vote type 1 14 081

Um… you what now?

By intheairtonight - 25/04/2012 06:22 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

agreeclassic 28 721

vote type 1 3 167

By erockinthesuburb - 11/04/2012 16:25 - United States - Algonquin

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

agreeclassic 16 938

vote type 1 41 952

By rusrs - 30/03/2012 02:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I learned that my mother now refuses to drink anything but bottled water because she actually believes that the government is putting a chemical in tap water that lowers pregnancy rates. She is trying for her 5th child. FML

agreeclassic 26 450

vote type 1 2 229

By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 01:31 - United States

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

agreeclassic 31 897

vote type 1 7 661