Budget Spa By FML Approved - 25/10/2017 20:30 Who else is ready to take a personal day with this dog? I agree, your life sucks 506 You deserved it 120 Share Tweet Share
Today, during a family dinner, my 5-year-old son excitedly told everyone that I let him use my "douche" last week. My parents glared at me in anger and horror, and only after they left did I find out that his brother had told him that's what my loofah is called. FML I agree, your life sucks 43 576 You deserved it 3 589
Today, driving home, my girlfriend and I decided we were finally going to have sex. We got in the backseat, then I opened my condom to find it was already broken. We ended up playing connect four instead. FML I agree, your life sucks 25 769 You deserved it 5 696
Today, I got my science test back. I thought I did a horrible job on it, but only three were circled. I was happy but doubtful that I did so well, so I asked my teacher just to make sure. He said it was faster to circle the correct answers. FML I agree, your life sucks 13 643 You deserved it 29 628
Today, I discovered the source of the vile stench in my room. My daughter had "saved" a bird from our cat and put it in a box under my bed, hoping to nurse it back to health. She forgot about it, leaving the corpse rotting in there for who knows how long. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 762 You deserved it 3 447
Today, I was relaxing in my dark, silent living room when I started hearing creepy, repeated sounds. It took me a while to realize those were the chickpeas I had left to swell up overnight in a glass container on the kitchen counter. FML I agree, your life sucks 320 You deserved it 120
Today, I was out to lunch when someone in the distance proposed to his partner. She said yes, everyone clapped and cheered. I, on the other hand, burst into tears and couldn't stop bawling for about half an hour. I'm a 32 year-old man and didn't even know the happy couple. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 382 You deserved it 496
I see carrots. Is it a bath, or are they making a stew?
Ok... that is just too cute for words! :)