App

FMyLife

search






FMyLife FMyLife
search
​



    : 320



    Health kick

    What am I supposed to do? - 31/05/2025 17:00 - United States

    Today, after years of my very poor diet finally resulted in a long overdue health scare, I declared I must try to live healthier. Also today, I was reminded of my hypersensitive gag reflex (I'm autistic), which causes my body to vehemently protest the consumption of a variety of healthy foods. This sucks. FML
    357
    168
      

    I get around

    Anonymous - 09/06/2025 20:00 - Sweden - Stockholm

    Today, my slutty ex, whom I'd dumped because she cheated on me, cheated on her new boyfriend as well. With me. FML
    99
    688
      

    It must be love

    Anonymous - 11/06/2025 14:00

    Today, my girlfriend went through my phone and when she found nothing she accused me of having a secret second phone, and is tearing apart the house and both cars looking for a secret phone. I’ve been making calls so the cops and a locksmith are on their way, I need this bitch out of my life. FML
    587
    103
      

    Fireworks

    Anonymous - 15/06/2025 03:00 - United States - San Diego

    Today, I tried to microwave a leftover burrito. I forgot to remove the foil it was wrapped in. The microwave went into overdrive in a dramatic display of sparks, the fire alarm went off, and I had to convince the neighbors at my door not to evacuate their apartments. I still haven’t eaten. FML
    58
    621
      

    Too late to take it back

    Anonymous - 16/06/2025 16:00 - Canada - King City

    Today, I texted my cousin to ask if he and his wife got the baby onesie I sent, as they are expecting their first child together. Turns out they got it, but it upset his wife as she had recently lost the baby. No one had told me before. FML
    564
    72
      

    It's a surprise alright

    Taylor - 20/06/2025 12:00 - United States - Las Vegas

    Today, I planned a surprise birthday party for my best friend. I told her to “be home by 7 for a little surprise.” She got home at 6:55… with her new boyfriend. Surprise: he hadn’t been invited. Awkward family introductions followed. FML
    342
    108
      

    Choices

    mybodyhatesme - 23/06/2025 17:00 - United States - Clive

    Today, I started chemo. My immune system is so bad, it keeps attacking organs throughout my body. I just got a job I love that pays well and has insurance for once, but I’m not sure I can keep working to pay for it, due to chemo side-effects and risky conditions of the job. FML
    529
    76
      

    Pesky wildlife

    PH… - 02/07/2025 16:00 - United States - Midland

    Today, I have horrible heartburn (as opposed to wonderful) so I went to pick my fresh Aloe vera for treatment… and saw it was all chewed up by wildlife, who apparently also have heartburn. FML
    318
    122
      

    Anti-advertisement

    Anonymous - 06/07/2025 14:30 - Iran - Bushehr

    Today, I was preparing to migrate the bookmarks from Edge to Brave, but during my migration process, four bookmark folders and some pages suddenly disappeared for some unknown reason. Those were saved a year ago, and they’re very important to me. FML
    308
    135
      

    Back to square one

    Anonymous - 09/07/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom

    Today, I created a 3D sculpture for a competition that I was hoping might impress some people, and maybe lead to a job with a particular company. I finished it last night for the competition, but this morning I realised it’s too big to get it out of my front door without taking it apart. FML
    304
    275
      

    Not so slinky

    BarneyRubble - 13/07/2025 15:00 - Ireland

    Today, I managed to lock myself out of my house again. My only option was crawling through the dog door. I managed it once before, but I must've put on weight because this time I got stuck halfway. My neighbour came over to “see if everything was OK.” He then helped push me through. FML
    215
    403
      

    Modern romance

    Herbie03 - 15/07/2025 09:00 - United States

    Today, my partner caught me cheating... on ChatGPT. I was secretly using AI to write my love poems. She said that she knew it, because she could “feel the difference in emotional tone.” FML
    73
    620
      

    Choose your family wisely

    Anonymous - 18/07/2025 22:00 - Serbia - Belgrade

    Today, did you ever ask yourself if someone loves you? I have, so many times, and my answer is always nobody. I live with my grandma and my sister; my sister has one boyfriend from Russia, and my grandma has sex every night, and I feel invisible. Only my neighbor makes me feel like a real family. FML
    321
    144
      

    Always with you

    Anonymous - 25/07/2025 20:00 - United States

    Today, I hung up the phone and went to tell my dad that I’d finished switching all the utilities into my name. Then I remembered I was switching them into my name because of his death. FML
    782
    73
      

    The big waiting room

    Big sad - 27/07/2025 15:00 - United States - Steele

    Today, my depression has reached the point where I'm not sure if I'm even living anymore. Sure, I'm very much alive and able to type this, but I feel as though I'm just existing. Taking up space. Doing nothing. I can't be alone here, right? FML
    412
    125
      

    Risky move

    Anonymous - 31/07/2025 09:00 - United States

    Today, I tried to impress a cute cop at a coffee shop by holding the door for her and saying, “You’re under arrest… for stealing my heart.” She deadpan replied, “That’s harassment, sir.” FML
    139
    839
      

    Intense humming

    Anonymous - 02/08/2025 03:00 - United States - Houston

    Today, while using a public bathroom, I was singing to myself because I thought I was alone and not in a rush. When I opened the door, three people were waiting in line. One of them rushed in behind me, another seemed really annoyed, and the third person said, "I love that song!", confirming that they heard everything FML
    111
    534
      

    Watch your step

    Anonymous - 03/08/2025 22:00 - United States

    Today, I was at a wedding and leaned over to whisper to my friend, “Wow, this is the cheapest-looking cake I’ve ever seen.” The bride was right behind me holding the cake knife. She heard every word. Luckily, she didn't stab me. FML
    70
    818
      

    Tex Avery moment

    Mustanggt - 07/08/2025 05:00 - United States

    Today, my roommate took my car without permission while I was at work. He downshifted to pass someone, but went from 5th to 2nd gear, and practically most of the engine went straight out of the tailpipe. FML
    517
    66
      

    Fitness check

    Christine - 11/08/2025 00:00 - United States

    Today, I went to my first spin class. Trying my best, I hopped on the bike and started pedaling like I’d been doing it for years. The instructor came over, adjusted the seat, and as soon as she let go, I completely lost my balance and tipped over. The bike fell sideways, taking me and two water bottles with it. FML
    368
    133
      

    Nervous wreck

    Anonymous - 14/08/2025 15:00 - United States

    Today, I kept running into the same guy in every aisle of the supermarket. By the fifth time, I nervously joked, “I guess we’re destined to be soulmates.” He gave me a deadpan look and replied, “I work here.” FML
    166
    461
      

    Overly polite in public

    Anonymous - 16/08/2025 09:00 - Canada - Vancouver

    Today, I was browsing the frozen section at the store when I saw movement in my peripheral vision. Thinking it was another customer, I said “Oh sorry, go ahead.” No one responded. I turned to see my own reflection in the freezer door. FML
    328
    133
      

    Charming

    lordoftheweird - 17/08/2025 18:00 - Canada - Kamloops

    Today, my grandmother tried to lecture me about discrimination. This is the same woman who lies about her grandchildren's race, and tried to convince a Jewish person that the Jews were responsible for the Holocaust. FML
    434
    109
      

    Teenagers…

    Anonymous - 19/08/2025 13:00 - United States - Seattle

    Today, my sister is being a complete jerk, hogging the TV (we listen to music on it) and is being bratty about it too. She smirks at me behind my parents' back, and says snarky comments too. When I tell my parents about it, then she acts all innocent and LIES, and then they don't believe me. FML
    416
    137
      

    Overwhelmed

    Anonymous - 23/08/2025 20:00 - Australia

    Today, and ever since I got pregnant, I hate how my husband smells. I hate his perfume, his toothpaste, his body odor, everything. When I tell him, he feels offended. I just want a hygienic man to be a little less hygienic, is that too much to ask? FML
    160
    496
      

    Welcome back

    Anonymous - - United Kingdom

    Today, I drove home from work, only to find both my next-door neighbours loudly arguing in the middle of my driveway. I got out and asked them what the hell was going on, only to find out one of their inbred kids had put a brick through my back window, and each is claiming the other did it. FML
    26 470
    2 322
      

    Date night to remember

    Anonymous - 26/08/2025 17:00 - United States - Saint Paul

    Today, I'd planned a low key date night with my partner for tonight. I told them about it last night. When they got home, they asked why I was dressed up. When I mentioned the date night, they just shrugged and said "Oh, OK" then made a joke about my lipstick. They didn’t change out of their grubby clothing. FML
    365
    165
      

    Classico

    Anonymous - 28/08/2025 20:00 - France - Nogent-sur-Marne

    Today, it's been 3 years since my wife told me we should take a break from sex. We haven't touched each other since. FML
    434
    132
      

    America's got talent

    Anonymous - 30/08/2025 15:00 - United States

    Today, I connected my phone to my car’s Bluetooth to listen to music. I didn’t realize my playlist had shuffled onto an old voice memo where I'd drunkenly recorded myself singing a heartfelt love song about pizza. It played as my boss got in for our carpool to a conference. I had to sit through the drive while she hummed along to “Cheese, you complete me.” FML
    101
    415
      

    Blackballed

    Anonymous - 01/09/2025 01:00 - United States - Boise

    Today, I broke down but couldn't call a tow truck driver because my now ex-fiancee cheated on me with multiple ones in our area. I threw it into neutral and pushed it off the road. I don't know what to do now. FML
    344
    177
      
    • 75
    • 76
    • 77
    • 78
    • 79
    • 80
    • 81
    • 82
    • 83
    • 84

    Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home
    FMyLife FMyLife
    FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, I had to cancel a first date due to tornado weather. The guy texted me, saying never to contact him again, and then blocked me. This is the fourth time this exact scenario has happened to me. FML
    686
    199
    Today, I had to spend two hours in the car with my mother. That doesn't sound so bad until you realize she's the kind of person who can, and did, spend nearly half an hour ranting about how the Big Beautiful Woman porn niche is the root of obesity in America. FML
    14 020
    1 029
    Today, I've been asking for help to close up store for the last 7 months, at the height of a global pandemic. My boss's excuse for no help? Joe Biden and the government is keeping everyone who would earn 10 dollars an hour from working, because they are all lazy. Joe wasn't president 7 months ago. FML
    901
    159
    Today, this lady came in my Starbucks and once again asked if we have the glass teddy bear cup. That cup has been sold out for the past month or so. We explained, once again, that the cup was a “while supplies last” item. She screamed at us and threatened to sue if we “ruin her daughter’s Christmas.” FML
    373
    76
    Today, I had to walk through an extremely crowded pub wearing a dorky prisoner outfit to get to a dress-up party at the back. When we got there, I soon realised it wasn't fancy dress, but just black-and-white themed. FML
    11 982
    21 990
    Today, while I was babysitting, the little girl wanted to show me a picture that her mom had just sent to the family iPad via iMessage. Trying to be helpful, I clicked iMessage, only to see pictures of her father's erect penis. She won't stop asking about the "hotdog" in the picture. FML
    37 839
    3 613

    © VDM SAS,

    ​