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OP here! Thanks for all the comments and concerns. To make this shorter I've already answered specific questions directly. She was a really nice lady and thought my hand tattoos (flowers,) were nice and just wanted to see the rest of the hidden one she noticed. After she realized just how far up my leg it went, and how high my skirt had been pulled she did back away. I could be mad at her but really I just see it as a funny story to tell, no harm was meant and she meant it as a compliment in her own way. She did tip me, and it helped my business at least since other customers felt bad for me and over tipped me. ;) Keep the jokes coming, I think they're all great!

OP here. I probably should’ve clarified this- she is not afraid of birds. The barn always has pigeons in it. She wasn’t afraid of the pigeon. The pigeon had gotten into a separate part of the barn that it isn’t supposed to be in. She was trying to get it out and decided the best way to do that was scream like a banshee until it left, which only made problems worse.

OP here. First of all, I want to thank everyone for their support. I get a lot of face-to-face support, and I'm not sure why the support of a bunch of strangers on the Internet is so meaningful, but it is. So thanks! Second, I want to provide a bit more detail. Not much more, as I don't want to say anything that will be too identifying or potentially useful for her if we ever go to trial: Thanks to the fairness of the system here and some actions she took initially, we have had 50/50 shared parenting time with the kids since almost the beginning. So I've been able to spend a lot of time with my kids, and when they forget they are supposed to hate me, it's been great! Then they remember, and things get very, very hard. And regardless of the challenges of having her here in the complex, this move of hers *will* make things easier on the kids - they'll be able to walk from household to household on transition days instead of getting driven. Much less disruptive. So yes, there is a silver lining. I like all of the suggestions of tracking or even recording all of our interactions. I'll have to check into the legality of actually recording, but writing down what happens and is said as soon afterward as possible is a great idea, and I'm going to add it to my toolkit. I also like the idea of having witnesses around. I don't think a restraining order is a possibility without a specific action on her part. But rest assured - if she does something that warrants it (see what I did there?), I will seek one. Thanks again, everyone!

Take this in. You ready for this? A meme page. Memes. A guy just so happened to run it.

It was a coach bus and I was sitting at the back, meaning I would have had to walk up an aisle of eyes and stand up there waiting for the driver to find a suitable place (not easy on irish country roads). Thanks tho :)

I didn't say anything kinda just stared at him with a look that said "you're an idiot" he then awkwardly walked off

OP here. Just to clarify: - I found out about the texts a month or so ago when she sent one just as we were cuddling in bed. That was fun. - Husband had not responded to her texts the way she would like, but he hadn't exactly told her to **** off either. He just kept bleating on about how they were supposed to be friends. Ostensibly it's because they worked together (we all work for an IT company but they were in a different department) and he didn't want to cause trouble but I think it's more that he quite liked the attention. He is well and truly in the doghouse. - She is well aware of our marriage and had met me several times prior to sexting my husband.