Health: Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out,...

By taydean - 26/05/2011 21:31 - United States

Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out, I thought it would be funny to kick the door open and yell, "This is Sparta!" I lost my balance and fell flat on my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 275

You deserved it 66 631

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By NaniNarcotic - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 970

You deserved it 74 295

By Krystyn Gareau - 09/09/2011 04:10 - Canada

Today, I went to Walmart with my Dad, and he decided to kick me in the butt while I was walking. When I went to kick him back, I hit my own leg out from beneath myself and landed on my face. The most embarrassing thing was that the people who saw all started clapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 110

You deserved it 13 713

By Anonymous - 21/05/2011 14:18 - United Kingdom

Today, I went out with my best friend and her hot brother. Upon our exit out of the restaurant I walked right into the glass door and rebounded back off it. The whole restaurant was silent as I shamefully walked out only to trip on the curb outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 477

You deserved it 7 816

By Anonymous - 23/01/2010 23:18 - United States

Today, I came home to find my little sister had decided to play hopscotch under our carport. Feeling a small childish urge, I decided to hop on one leg to the front door. I tripped and fell, slicing my knee open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 735

You deserved it 21 329

By lulabell - 19/05/2009 02:07 - United States

Today, I waved at a cute guy when I was leaving Wendy's. I then ran into a curb, spilled my Frosty, and hit my head on the steering wheel. I turned around and both the cute guy and his dad were in hysterics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 257

You deserved it 43 963

By Anonymous - 09/06/2019 04:00

Today, while browsing through Walmart, I slipped on a piece of clothing and fell backwards into an obese lady’s butt. When I landed, she farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 981

You deserved it 297

Doorman

By shit - 26/01/2014 18:20 - United States - South Holland

Today, my sister was taking forever in the bathroom, and I jokingly threatened to kick down the door. I rammed into it, and it actually bust almost off its hinges. My sister screamed and our parents came running. Now I'm grounded forever and our bathroom has no door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 122

You deserved it 46 825

Slapstick

By That Dumbass Friend - 28/07/2025 12:00 - United States - Newport

Today, I laughed at my friend for tripping on the sidewalk. While imitating him to show “how stupid" he looked, I stepped on the exact same sidewalk, twisted my ankle, and fell over in front of a bunch of strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52

You deserved it 840

Patsy

By Anonymous - 28/04/2022 12:00

Today, my brother ran in, handed me a spatula, and told me to stand still. Barely a second later, our sister came tearing in the house with a fresh, raised welt on her ass cheek in the shape of said spatula, saw me holding said spatula, and kicked my ass up and down the house until I escaped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 989

You deserved it 180

Pranks are terrible

By Anonymous - 05/08/2021 23:01 - United States - Humble

Today, my sister threw my water bottle as a joke. When I stepped off the bleachers, my right foot lost its footing and my other foot followed. Now I have two sprained ankles at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 670

You deserved it 86

dreamering 16

Friday 27 May 2011 0:59

I think # 3 was behind the door.

Jorcar 8

Friday 27 May 2011 0:53

Way to be random.

Comments

Ames19 6

Friday 27 May 2011 2:10

ROFL!!!!!

MrSexyPants 14

Friday 27 May 2011 2:13

That's what you get for being Kane an unoriginal.

MrSexyPants 14

Friday 27 May 2011 2:17

*lame

creedaddict 9

Friday 27 May 2011 2:35

ha! dumb ass

planetsmurf 6

Friday 27 May 2011 2:38

you would probably be one of the kids tossed over the cliff, in the movie, if you couldn't best a door

Taydean 1

Friday 27 May 2011 5:42

wtf learn to spell when you dis someone dumb ass

RainbowHeadache 2

Friday 27 May 2011 8:19

Don't correct someone's grammar when you can't even spell or use a comma.

Ikdiy2009 0

Friday 27 May 2011 2:42

Win!!!!!

YoUglyMama 0

Friday 27 May 2011 2:42

don't sweat it - it prolly didn't hurt with the extra padding a la Wendy's

abby1029 8

Friday 27 May 2011 2:49

at least it was your way out it would of been more embarrasing coming in.

aamador 4

Thursday 26 July 2012 0:58

Well either way woulda sucked especially if you were in the middle of saying something

FreebirdIII 1

Friday 27 May 2011 2:58

I ate Wendy today too. She's easy, but good.

redtigerlily 5

Friday 27 May 2011 2:58

That's what you get for trying to show off

blinkingstarlet 15

Friday 27 May 2011 3:04

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!

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I agree, your life sucks 964

You deserved it 128

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I agree, your life sucks 730

You deserved it 151