Love: Today, my crush was talking to me on Facebook. He said, "Did...

By Icy - 01/10/2009 06:59 - United States

Today, my crush was talking to me on Facebook. He said, "Did you know that 99% of the time a guy is talking to a girl it's because he wants to go out with her? Yeah, well, this is that 1%." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 749

You deserved it 3 726

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

He has a type

By Anonymous - 15/06/2025 16:00 - United States - Boise

Today, I noticed my crush of almost 3 years was talking to me a lot more at school. He seemed genuinely comfortable around me, even playing with my rings during class. I thought maybe I had a chance. Nope. A mutual friend just told me he likes another girl. A girl who coincidentally looks just like me but skinnier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 108

Nice guy

By sucksatlove - 25/07/2013 23:20 - United States - Sewell

Today, I finally worked up the courage to start a Facebook chat with a guy I really like. It went so well, and he even agreed to hang out sometime. Seconds after we finished our conversation, he changed his status to, "Desperate bitches really piss me off." FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 034

You deserved it 7 713

Another one bites the dust

By fail - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out that yet another of my guy friends liked me. I then posted on social media that I just wanted a guy friend that had absolutely no romantic feelings for me. My crush volunteered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 059

You deserved it 68 553

By hatethatiloveyou - 10/02/2009 00:37 - United States

Today, my crush talked to me for the first time. He told me to stop staring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 954

You deserved it 14 814

By hannahisacooler - 16/07/2013 23:41 - United States - Chino Hills

Today, I told the guy I liked about my crush on him. He said he would keep me in mind if he ever hits rock bottom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 368

You deserved it 3 884

By awkward - 26/09/2016 21:31 - United States - Oakland

Today, I was out to dinner with a friend I had a crush on. The whole time, he was flirting with the waitress while I was trying to get him to notice me. When we got the check, he looked at her and said, "She's not my girlfriend, I only go out with pretty girls. So, can I have your number?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 031

You deserved it 1 380

By Not Gay - 09/06/2015 03:04 - United States - Williamston

Today, I found out the reason my crush has been talking so openly to me. Not because she likes me back, but because she thinks I'm gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 193

You deserved it 2 663

Great deal

By danny - 14/12/2021 08:01 - United States - Federal Way

Today, my crush from high school finally agreed to go out with me. While on the seemingly good date, she offered me a discount to her OnlyFans page. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 141

You deserved it 215

Broken heart

By Anonymous - 23/06/2021 16:01 - Spain

Today, my crush DM-ed my best friend, asking her to meet "without me knowing about it." We had been meeting occasionally for at least 8 years. In fact, a few days ago I'd told him that I was going to be in his town and he replied that he wouldn't be there that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 242

You deserved it 308

Very encouraging, cheers

By Anonymous - 06/08/2023 08:00

Today, I told a bunch of my friends that I have a crush on this one girl. They all said it's definitely one-sided and I have no chance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 698

You deserved it 172

Dr_Know 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 14:40

Should have been like 'Well 99% of the time when a girl is talking to a guy on FB it's because she feels sorry for him. This is part of that 99%'

W76 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 12:51

awesome line!

Comments

AngelRaven89 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 16:25

THE Kevin Nealon?? Tht guys awsome.. haha.. Doug and his banjo.. "Where theres fire - there is smoke! where theres fire - people like to toke! oh where theres fire - we can all get baked! And if we're lucky, maybe we'll get laid!" op that's really unfortunate for you, but at least he told you right off instead of finding out years later like these other FML's.. it could always be worse. He could have been way nastier.

tyralpha 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 16:29

Hey kids, get this, just because he said that he doesn't have a crush on her, that doesn't automatically make him an @$$hole. Perhaps he *wants* to be your friend and he just worded it in a really crappy way? I know something similar happened to me, we both agreed to be just friends, and then, a bit of a romance started (of course 18 days after it started a freak incident occured and I lost contact with her, so maybe my experience shouldn't be used as an example...). Be yourself, be his friend, you may be surprised what circumstances arise. (not a sex joke)