Poopoo peepee and Miscellaneous: Pissed off

Pissed off

By lionhead14 - 20/05/2011 19:05 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up needing to wee. I was at my boyfriend's and didn't want to wake him, so I sat on the edge of the toilet and peed as quietly as possible. I realised after that I'd sat too far over and had peed on the floor. There was no loo paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 921

You deserved it 42 611

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Same thing different taste

By penguinsfan - 16/05/2009 14:47 - Canada

Today, I had to pee badly. I went into a stall and sat down. Only until after I'd peed, I realized that I didn't have any toilet paper. I waddled to the next stall with my pants down to get more toilet paper, believing that the bathroom was empty. It wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 134

You deserved it 53 819

Sprinkler system

By missed - 25/06/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 261

You deserved it 1 426

Close call

By Anonymous - 31/10/2024 04:00 - United States - Bremerton

Today, I woke up and realized I had to pee sooo bad. The problem was, I sleep naked with my partner, who lives with one of their sisters. I didn't have time to get dressed before running to a shared bathroom, and even then I "drizzled" a little bit on the bathroom floor. I cleaned it and myself up but still… FML

I agree, your life sucks 134

You deserved it 501

By Anonymous - 07/06/2016 07:45

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 924

You deserved it 1 244

You OK in there?

By Anonymous - 22/06/2025 00:00 - Ireland

Today, I went to the bathroom at a friend’s house, used the toilet paper, and realized there was none left on the roll. I grabbed a replacement pack but it was all the way on the top shelf that was too high for me. I stood on tiptoes, balancing precariously on the toilet lid when it suddenly flipped down, knocking me off, and splashing pisswater everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 198

By Oh dear - 05/07/2012 22:15 - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines - Kingstown

Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 629

You deserved it 2 735

By anti-peecleaner - 22/11/2010 22:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 474

You deserved it 5 246

Toxic waste

By Anonymous - 27/08/2025 06:00 - United States - North Hollywood

Today, while apartment hunting with my boyfriend, I needed to use the bathroom. We were on our own and no toilet paper. Fortunately I carry wipes with me, because I had to more than just pee. All was fine, until I tried to flush and realized the water was turned off. The next person will get quite the surprise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 380

By Anonymous - 13/03/2010 09:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 800

You deserved it 10 109

Confinement, episode 3774

By S3XY_SiNG3R - 11/04/2020 02:00

Today, I woke up to use the restroom, because I had to take a shit. There was basically no toilet paper left. I asked my boyfriend if he could go get some. It was 1 a.m. He said he’d go when the stores were open, then told me to just rinse off in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 2 094

WHOWASTHEPHONE 10

Saturday 21 May 2011 0:47

How does sitting on the edge making it more quiet?

KatrinaKitten 16

Saturday 21 May 2011 0:50

How about closing the door....

Comments

WhiteZoneRedZone 6

Saturday 21 May 2011 6:16

What a pisser!

reggicm 0

Saturday 21 May 2011 6:27

"loo paper," I love it! :) lol

haylz86 0

Saturday 21 May 2011 6:28

it's called loo paper in Aus too, or bog roll....

lacey6195 4

Saturday 21 May 2011 6:29

wow. u need help

heyred 11

Saturday 21 May 2011 6:36

Wee? Are you five?

Capt_Oblivious 10

Saturday 21 May 2011 6:41

You deserve it for using words like 'wee' and 'loo paper'.

angellovesjake17 0

Saturday 21 May 2011 6:53

Hehe when I read this I automatically knew what OP was talking about, but I couldn't help giggling like a school girl at "loo"

iamtwiggyme 0

Saturday 21 May 2011 7:04

Am I the only one who thought about the toilet flushing? Isn't that gonna be louder than peeing? Or is she just not gonna flush?

skittles009 0

Saturday 21 May 2011 7:11

ydi for being an idiot who gives a #### if he hears u piss.. im pretty sure he knows everyone pisses and its not like u were taking a dump

maaariiiaahhhh 0

Monday 30 May 2011 9:26

If that's the case, then he should know that everyone drops some fresh deuces every once in a while ...

lextheplex 0

Saturday 21 May 2011 7:15

hahaha I've done this a few times lmao

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The Top

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend gets a nose bleed every time he orgasms. FML

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Today, I washed all the dishes that had been piling in the sink over the week, and set them in the drying rack before I left for school. I came home to see that my dad’s girlfriend had put them back into the sink, along with her dirty dishes. She told me to re-wash them. Why? “They didn’t smell clean.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 973

You deserved it 126

Today, I overheard my mom, who quit smoking years ago, saying that I am the only person who stresses her out badly enough to want to smoke a cigarette. I have never once tried to stress her out, and in fact I do everything I can to make her life easier. She works in retail. FML

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You deserved it 129

Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 617

You deserved it 83 073

Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML

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You deserved it 677

Today, I was at work, when this guy came in and paid for his ice cream, then handed me a dollar. I've never gotten a tip before, so I looked at him and said, "Thank you so much, I appreciate it." He stared at me with a weird look for a moment, and then said, "Can I just get that in quarters?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 140

You deserved it 5 657