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    : 320



    Anonymous - 17/04/2016 22:30 - Australia - Adelaide

    Today, while at my work at a supermarket, someone didn't plug in the fridge that contains all of the fish. So I had to spend the next hour cleaning out week old rotten fish out of the fridge.
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    anonymous - 17/04/2016 22:17 - United States - Birmingham

    Today, I was looking for a job online. I emailed the links to myself, only to find out later that I misspelled the email. It took me hours to find them, and now I can't find them again. FML.
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    hereforfmls - 17/04/2016 22:09 - United States - Jasper

    Today, I was playing a videogame when I noticed 5 flying insects near my window. went and got insect killer turned out I had a termite infestation and there was over one hundred flying termites FML
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    katydid91 - 17/04/2016 21:52 - United States - Dallas

    Today, My IBS decided to flare up. In the middle of the line for security check at the airport. I've been stuck on the toilet for the last 15 minutes. FML.
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    anonyme - 17/04/2016 21:49 - United States - Colton

    Today, I walked outside for the first time in a week after being sick to enjoy some fresh air. when a gnat flew into my eye and fought violently to survive its mistake. FML
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    Anonymous - 17/04/2016 21:43 - Chile - Santiago

    Today, after a thorough brainwashing carried out by his family, my 30-year-old fiance decided he could not be trusted make personal decisions. FML
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    Anonymous - 17/04/2016 21:39 - United States - Bonita Springs

    Today I discovered that my girlfriend's "day job" is a camgirl. I'm not sure if I should be angry that Internet pervs see her naked more than I do or be jealous that, working 8 hours a week, she pulls down 5 times what I make working 40+ hour weeks.
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    samm - 17/04/2016 21:24 - United States - Hackensack

    Today, I was shooting hoops with my boyfriend at the park. He shot the ball and rather than hitting the hoop , he hit my face. I got a black eye, bloody nose, my lip ring came out and my glasses broke. In the middle of public. FML
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    Emperor_416 - 17/04/2016 21:11 - United States - Bensalem

    Today, my sister got us both kicked out of the house. How, you ask? She bitched to our mom for hours about how bored she was, but instead of just saying she was bored, she said her and I were bored. I never made a single mention of being bored. FML
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    fast food sucks - 17/04/2016 20:45 - United States - Hopewell Junction

    Today, an old lady came into the McDonald's I work at and tried to pay with pennies. After counting them for 10 minutes, I realized they were Canadian pennies and we couldn't accept them anyway. FML
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    fandomoftheopera - 17/04/2016 20:33 - United States - Apopka

    Today, while working in the Doggy Day Camp, my phone fell in the shit bucket. FML
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    ouch - 17/04/2016 20:32 - United Kingdom

    Today, I finally got a cast on the arm I broke four days ago. My mum has been making me go to school and do chores with it unprotected because she didn't believe it was broken. I broke it because she thought it would be funny to scare me while I was walking down our stone stairs.
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    felicialynnnn - 17/04/2016 20:28 - United States - San Francisco

    Today, after locking myself out and while waiting for my boyfriend to return home and unlock the door, I had to watch helplessly as my three-year-old managed to uncap blue food coloring and squeeze its contents onto my brand new carpet. FML
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    Anonymous - 17/04/2016 20:10 - South Africa - Johannesburg

    Today,while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he said in the middle of it, "Okay it's getting late, I have to call my mom." We are both in our 20's. FML
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    Notzimia - 17/04/2016 20:10 - United Kingdom - Ammanford

    Today, at the gym, when I was really starting to enjoy my workout and feel motivated to exercise, my stomach hit the emergency stop button. FML.
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    onlyme25 - 17/04/2016 19:57 - United States - Panama City

    Today, it's not uncommon for me to wake up and have to clean a shitty bed. My daughter is not quite two yet. It is however very uncommon for me to wake up and there be shit in my own bed. My husband is 33. FML.
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    jjr - 17/04/2016 19:42 - United States - White Plains

    Today i was going down on my boyfriend when his mom suddenly called to say she was coming upstairs.Turns out, she had one of those creepy teddy bear nanny cams hidden in the room...and made us watch the footage FML.
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    Anonymous - 17/04/2016 19:25 - United States - Roxboro

    Today, as I was using the bathroom, I went to wipe and my engagement ring fell off of my finger and into the toilet. FML
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    Nico - 17/04/2016 19:21 - United Kingdom - Bradford

    Today I have an important exam which will contribute to my final year grade. Last night my father got drunk and played music until 5 am, giving me an hours sleep before I had to get up for school. Im too tired to focus, but too embarrassed to explain the situation to my teacher for a retake.
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    funfat - 17/04/2016 19:15 - United Kingdom - Camberley

    Today, I was punched in the face by a random guy on the street. He claimed that I had stolen his girl. It turns out that my identical twin who lives with me was the one to blame. FML
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    shy girl - 17/04/2016 18:50 - United States - Dothan

    Today, my boss made me give a tour to a group of college students although it is her job. I'm terrified of public speaking and she knows this. Three minutes into the tour my mind went blank. The instructor with them spoke up and said, "and that is why you take public speaking." FML
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    noname - 17/04/2016 18:47 - United States - Bellevue

    Today, my overheard my daughter complaining to her friend that I wouldn't let her get implants. She's 6.
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    heidelynn - 17/04/2016 18:44 - United States - Amarillo

    Today, I woke up sick and I've been throwing up all day. Today is also the day my period decided to start. I can no longer tell the difference between cramping and needing to through up. FML
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    _WeZyAf - 17/04/2016 18:26 - United States - Saint Paul

    Today, I sent my crush a snapchat of my full face, he replied back with "what filter is that?" FML.
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    Experteric - 17/04/2016 18:23 - United States

    Today, I was at an After-Prom party, and afterward, walked a female friend to her vehicle afterwards. I opened the door and was very gentlemanly. I said goodbye, and closed the door. Directly on her foot. FML
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    salii321 - 17/04/2016 18:13 - Australia

    Today, while serving at the checkout at work the customer sneezed. He then proceeded to give me his items...which were wet. I couldn't was my hands for three hours. FML
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    rockbottomgirl - 17/04/2016 18:11 - United States - Blacklick

    Today, the love of my life & best friend of 16 years left me and kicked me out after moving in 3 weeks ago. Seems the 20 year old, ex-stripper he met 2 months ago and made a roommate seemed a better option than his promise to help me recover from an addiction to a drug he brought into my life. FML.
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    justmeh169 - 17/04/2016 18:09 - United States - Point Pleasant

    Today, instead of sending to my best friend a message about me being liking a girl on my softball team, I sent it to our teams group chat. FML.
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    Bellaalise - 17/04/2016 17:54 - United States - Fairfield

    today, I tried asking a guy out that I really liked. I got him his favorite candy and a card and flowers. when I knocked on his door a girl answered. the girl was his girlfriend. FML.
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    ellisp1 - 17/04/2016 17:52 - United States - Omaha

    Today, I was showering. I slipped, and on they way down I grabbed the curtain rod. In addition to ripping it out of the wall, I plunged it into the side of the bathroom. It would be okay to fix, if it didn't make a hole through my bathroom right into my neighbor's bathroom. FML
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    FMyLife FMyLife
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    Today, I realized that the only human being I have talked to in the last three days is the guy at the drive thru. FML
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    Today, I found out that my partner of 2 years has been lying to me and cheating on me from the beginning of our relationship. The worst part is I don’t know how to confront him because I found out by going through his phone. FML
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    Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML
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    Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML
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    Today, my son brought home a girlfriend who actually talks like Vicky Pollard from Little Britain. I simply couldn’t take her seriously, or even understand what she was talking about. This has to be a prank. In fact, it better be because it’s not funny. My son's an idiot. FML
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    Today, my new friend and I went out to a concert. When we came back to her house, she ran upstairs and left me alone. Suddenly, a naked man came into my view and I stared at him, horrified. Great way to meet her Dad. FML
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