Love

Thank you for your service

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my girlfriend of three years broke up with me because I'm in the military and I'm gone too much. The reason I enlisted in the first place is because we agreed that the money and benefits I would earn would help us be able to start a family in the future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 370

You deserved it 4 067

A few hours later…

By Xandler - 17/07/2025 22:57 - United States

Today, I had a date with a woman I had been talking to for a month. We hit it off, the date went fantastic, and we agreed to see each other again. Fast forward a few hours and I'm told she decided to pursue someone else, equates it to "bad timing", but wants to be friends. If not for bad luck, I'd have no luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 575

You deserved it 142

Xandler tells us more.

Xandler 8

Thursday 17 July 2025 17:44

OP here. First published FML! Woot! Backstory for anyone who cares. We met of PoF, we talked and got to know each other, like the FML said for about a month. The date was a spur of the moment thing as she said she was interested. So, we went out, we both had a fun time. I knew she was seeing someone else (they apparently had 2 dates), and I guess he asked her that night to be exclusive. As a little sidenote, by her admission she told me her relationships with men she has been with have been toxic. It's whatever now, I wished her the best and told her I'd be around if she needed to chat.

My love language is gibberish

By Anonymous - 18/07/2025 00:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I tried to sweet talk my crush by texting them in Spanish using Google Translate. I wanted to say, “You look amazing today,” but it translated to something like, “Your fish smells weird today.” They responded with a confused emoji and “¿Qué?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 81

You deserved it 372

Maddening

By ballnchain - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my insanely jealous wife flipped out and made me promise never to hug any of my female friends or go to lunch with them, ever. It's "cheating." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 936

You deserved it 20 123

Wedding bells

By Sad sad bride - 16/07/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of several years told me the only way he’d ever consider getting married was if we had no wedding, just signing the paper at the courthouse with no ceremony or guests whatsoever, and as long as we don’t tell anyone about it. He doesn’t get why I’m devastated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 490

You deserved it 180

Snoopy

By No way - 16/07/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom - Bradford

Today, I liked one of my crush’s Instagram post from 2012 while stalking his profile. Despite me realising my mistake and un-liking the post, he immediately followed me back, and sent me a DM saying, “Wow, that’s some deep digging.” I’m now referred to as his "creepy stalker archaeologist of Instagram." FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 551

Wishful thinking

By Anonymous - 15/07/2025 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife told me she’s pregnant and we went through the whole range of emotions together, surprise, happiness, tears, anger, acceptance, you name it. An hour later she said she wanted to save the pregnancy test for memories. Guess she forgot her glasses, it very clearly says NOT pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 495

You deserved it 102

The heart wants…

By Anonymous - 15/07/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, my smartwatch notified me that my heart rate spiked at the same time as my partner was getting me to listen to her favourite band's favorite song, and she took it as I sign that we must like the same music, and that we are so compatible. What she doesn't know is that I was checking my ex’s social media on the side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81

You deserved it 815

Modern romance

By Herbie03 - 15/07/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, my partner caught me cheating... on ChatGPT. I was secretly using AI to write my love poems. She said that she knew it, because she could “feel the difference in emotional tone.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 620

Nag nag nag

By Whipped like cream - 14/07/2025 15:00 - Netherlands

Today, I ignored my wife's phone calls at work, since all she ever wants to do is complain or talk about chores and projects. An hour later, security called my desk. She'd shown up at work to bitch me out for ignoring her. Now I'm the laughing stock of my workplace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 554

You deserved it 219

Suspicious minds

By Summer - 14/07/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I came back home from an errand and found my ex in bed, embracing my 20 year-old daughter. They said that nothing has been going on. Glad he's an ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 549

You deserved it 94

Bad start

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was running the track at my school. My crush of two years was running in front of me, so I decided to catch up and finally talk to her. When I caught up, the only thing I could think to say was, "What's your name?" even though I already knew. She replied, "Natalie". Her name is Melissa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 567

You deserved it 7 615

Check, please!

By No second date - 13/07/2025 06:00 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a fun, attractive girl. She ordered off the kid's menu, drowned her food in ketchup, and said my burger with blue cheese and bacon was disgusting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 170

Like in the movies

By alltern8ive - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic by dipping me backwards and kissing me. He dropped me on my butt, then stepped on my hand while trying to help me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 650

You deserved it 5 166

Ragebait backfire

By Melybae - 12/07/2025 14:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I’ve been systematically sharing stories and posts about how love sucks and man-bashing memes so that my crush would regret his decision about rejecting me and choosing another girl over me. He DM’ed me : “Getting tired of your shit Melissa, I’m blocking you.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 74

You deserved it 1 315

You can't hurry love

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my grandma wasn't feeling well, so I went to her house to check on her. After about 20 minutes, I knew she was feeling better when she looked at me and said, "So, do you have a boyfriend yet? I pray every night that I get to live long enough to see you with a boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 676

You deserved it 4 135

Acts of service

By Diet time 4 me smh - 11/07/2025 18:00 - United States

Today, I asked my best friend, who I love, what his new girlfriend has that I don’t. I've gone the extra mile, did favors, been there at his highest and lowest for about a year and a half, yet he rejected me and chose a girl who he’s merely known 5 months. Apparently a slim waist and perky boobs/butt matters more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 680

Heart to heart

By Anonymous - 11/07/2025 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my sister answered texts from my girlfriend as though she was me. My girlfriend was glad we had a real heart to heart, even if it was just texts, while I was busy at work. I have no idea what they talked about and I’m too cowardly to break her heart by telling her it was my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88

You deserved it 457

Pizza > Love

By Anonymous - 11/07/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I leaned in to kiss my boyfriend goodnight at the door. He smiled sweetly, cupped my cheek… and then used his other hand to pull the last slice of pizza out of my hand and slam the door shut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 112

Thanks, I guess

By Anonymous - 09/07/2025 14:00 - United States - Lancaster

Today, my best friend got married. I had introduced her to her now husband, and ever since she has basically acted like I don't exist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 408

You deserved it 92

Bizarre love triangle

By sunburychick - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I realised that the man who I wanted to be with, the man who wanted to be with me, and my husband were three different people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 124

You deserved it 26 381

Bonkers

By Anonymous - 09/07/2025 05:00 - United States - Owensboro

Today, my wife had a dream that I cheated on her with a girl from my work named Marie. She told me that she wants me to quit my job and get a new one, just to avoid that from ever actually happening. There is nobody named Marie at my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 70

Lovable but annoying

By Anonymous - 09/07/2025 01:00 - United States - Great Falls

Today, I was in Barnes & Noble and some asshole was walking around with his phone on speaker to hear the baseball game. That asshole was my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 144

Yikes

By nycgirl424 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend of two years sent me a text message saying, "Don't worry I'm gonna break up with her soon. Love you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 117

You deserved it 3 265

Oddly specific turn off

By FatCoco - 07/07/2025 21:00 - United States

Today, my Tinder date ordered a separate check and said there won’t be a second date, all because I ordered my meal without vegetables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 262

You deserved it 434

It's not just stuff

By Anonymous - 07/07/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my almost-mother-in-law demanded I give my engagement ring back because it was originally her great-grandmother's, and she has now decided she wants it to go to her youngest son’s fiancée instead. My fiancé agreed and told me he’d just buy me another. He doesn’t get why I’m so upset either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 101

Suspicious activity

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Baltimore

Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 573

You deserved it 3 007

Modern love

By Angang - 07/07/2025 06:00 - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend of three months only posts me on his Close Friends stories instead of his main stories, because he’s afraid of hurting his close female friend who he'd put in the friendzone. Apparently, she can’t stand him moving on with me. He values her opinion more than his relationship with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 117

Hell no!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my ex-wife, whom I divorced just 8 months ago, asked me to attend her wedding, because "it would mean a lot" to her. She's marrying the man she cheated on me with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 789

You deserved it 3 395

Freakout

By Anonymous - 05/07/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I learned my wife has an extra level of anger. First is sarcasm, then yelling, then the silent treatment, it’s been that way for our whole marriage. Turns out the level above that is hurling a sledgehammer at me. She still won’t tell me what I did to surpass the silent treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 123

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, my boyfriend fell asleep during phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 397

You deserved it 28 361

Today, I noticed a spot on my leg that I wanted a closer look at. I went to put my phone screen towards it for more lighting while my sister was in front of me, looking. I'm pretty sure she saw my nude that I forgot was on the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 2 400

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 433

You deserved it 2 950

Today, we had a safety meeting at my warehouse job. They had an entire PowerPoint based around their message, "Stop getting hurt; it costs the company too much money." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 538

You deserved it 4 230

Today, I was talking with some of my friends who are girls. They were all complaining about how there was no good boys left to ask to the Sadie Hawkins Dance. Hoping for an invite I mentioned I was still available. They just laughed at me and invited me to come dress shopping with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 719

You deserved it 4 841

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 819

You deserved it 58 564