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Anonymous - 22/11/2010 19:52 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of over a year looked at me and said, "Sometimes I just want to hit you." FML

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How can I put it…?

Anonymous - - United States

Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML

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Anonymous - 20/04/2013 01:16 - New Zealand

Today, I was the victim of a drive-by egging by some bastard riding a Segway. He still got away. FML

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Late bloomer

Mike - - United States

Today, I got a call from my son's school saying to pick him up because he'd shat his pants. He's in high school. FML

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Anonymous - 16/10/2012 01:19 - United States - Evansville

Today, my parents gave me a sock and card for my eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." FML

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