•
•
•

theamazingone_12

0

0

7

40

3012

8

Pearland, USA

Theamazingone_12

Theamazingone_12 -

Theamazingone_12 -

Theamazingone_12

Andrew Qui...

lovers5201

LaBelleGos...

ihogiph

KathrinLor...

jennyferan...

zorauk

i-ll-ogiqu...

Echo 8802

Savanna593...

cknuggetlo...

usurai

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

KathrinLor...

bluejay200...

delfino160...

Theamazingone_12

Theamazingone_12

Señor Guapo - 04/03/2009 17:42 - United States

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

31 734

45 421

Noise complaint

no sleep for me - 08/01/2013 07:44

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

41 418

5 740

smart move there - 16/05/2012 16:10 - Ireland - Naas

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

54 620

5 082

lafinesse - 14/05/2012 22:23

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

44 664

4 534

omgwhyme - 08/01/2012 14:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML

56 482

49 373