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    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


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    Nature ain't all that great

    By Lucky me - 09/04/2026 09:00 - The Netherlands - Weert

    Today, I was helping my boyfriend in the garden. When I wanted to break a piece of wood, I lost my balance. Head first against a stone. Result: five stitches in my upper lip, and a loose tooth. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 53
    You deserved it 12
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    Never a dull moment

    By Annoyed - 09/04/2026 12:00 - United States

    Today, I’m a nurse on a night shift and I finally got a quiet moment to eat. I heated my meal, sat down, and took one bite before my pager went off. By the time I got back 40 minutes later, someone had “cleaned up” the break room and thrown my untouched dinner away. I ate crackers from a vending machine at 3 a.m. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 30
    You deserved it 6
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    Health Gross Love Awkward Sex Intimacy Work Transportation Cars Annoying Garden Cooking Miscellaneous Embarrassing Teachers School Sports Relatable Airplanes Kids I need your advice AITA Birthday NSFW Parenting Frustration Covid Funerals Money Family
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    Today, a revolving door got the better of me. I made it into the crowded lobby, unlike my skirt. Bad day to wear a thong. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 29 477
    You deserved it 3 809
    Today, while at a night club, I was wearing a brand new outfit that I absolutely loved. I was enjoying myself until I felt something wet drop onto my head and body from above. It was puke from a drunk guy in the V.I.P. section. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 8 676
    You deserved it 651
    Today, while I was working in a grocery store, a costumer decide to take a dump on the ground after I told him he couldn’t access to restrooms because my boss closed them due to COVID restrictions. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 011
    You deserved it 188
    Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over something that happened 5 years ago. We've only been together for 2 years as of this July. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 12 744
    You deserved it 1 078
    Today, I had lunch with my parents. I'm an Asian guy who married a Puerto Rican woman and we just had a boy. My dad looks at my son, then looks at me and says, "You ruined the bloodline." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 37 996
    You deserved it 3 419
    Today, after soccer practice I was looking for my dad. Last night he was an hour late, so I was pretty pissed. When I spotted him, I saw him flirting with a much younger woman. I then tried throwing my soccer ball to his feet, but ended up slamming his head. Only to find out he wasn't my dad. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 10 791
    You deserved it 38 642
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