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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML?

Feel like sharing it with the other users of FML?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story passes through the moderation process, it will published in the next 24 hours.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


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    One hand clapping

    By Anonymous - 06/01/2026 20:00

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, I woke up earlier than most days, I spooned my wife, gently massaging her back and letting her feel I was ready for play. She finally woke up, got dressed, and didn’t give a damn. I had to work it out myself once again. FML
    agreeclassic 19
    vote type 1 38
    Share  

    Lifelike

    By Anonymous - 06/01/2026 22:00

    Today, I leaned in to pet what I thought was a very realistic dog statue outside a café. It was a real dog. I startled it, screamed, spilled my coffee on myself, and the dog judged me. Loudly. FML
    agreeclassic 10
    vote type 1 62
    Share  

    What gauge strings are you using??

    By Anonymous - 07/01/2026 00:00

    Today, I forgot to tune my guitar pre-performance. Surprising, because it was in tune when I frantically did it by ear backstage. Too bad two of the six strings snapped, smacking the drummer in the face. FML
    agreeclassic 8
    vote type 1 12
    Share  
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    Keywords

    Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home
    Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my tits. He ignored it and instead sent a picture of his dog "looking blazed". FML
    agreeclassic 49 286
    vote type 1 17 699
    Today, my father described me as "the sort of sucker women marry then cheat on all the time." My mother agreed with him. FML
    agreeclassic 38 275
    vote type 1 3 619
    Today, my girlfriend got a detention for public display of affection. We go to different schools. FML
    agreeclassic 60 219
    vote type 1 4 480
    Today, I spilled water on the front of my pants right before a meeting so I tried drying them with the hand dryer in the bathroom. A coworker walked in just as I was awkwardly squatting in front of the machine. FML
    agreeclassic 353
    vote type 1 146
    Today, I bought the girl I like concert tickets for our favorite artist, who is usually never in our town, for her birthday. She said, “No thanks, I have to work that day.” She works Monday-Friday. The concert is on Saturday. When I mentioned this, she asked me, “So, what did you think of the Super Bowl halftime show?” FML
    agreeclassic 437
    vote type 1 246
    Today, my car crashed and the only refuge was at a nearby house, the resident of which was a crazy psycho. Now replace "crazy psycho" with "crazy ex-girlfriend who won't help you unless you compose a poem about how much you love her." FML
    agreeclassic 34 144
    vote type 1 4 888
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