BotheredPants71

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Botheredpants71's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 09/12/2009 13:27 - United States

Today, I met a girl who's the whole package: brains, beauty, shared interests, great personality, single, and into me. Too bad I married my bitchy, depressive high school girlfriend who said she'd kill herself if I didn't. Sometimes, she still tells me she'll do it if we divorce. I believe her. FML

agreeclassic 50 441

vote type 1 24 061

By jesspacheco27 - 12/12/2014 05:52 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I sat on the bus for 3 hours stuck in traffic trying to ignore the old lady sitting next to me discreetly masturbating. FML

agreeclassic 39 242

vote type 1 3 053

jesspacheco27 app_comment_confession_title

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Friday 12 December 2014 22:02

Yes longest 3 hours of my life. Worst part is she'd remove her hand and smell it.

By AOart1st - 21/11/2014 03:25 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML

agreeclassic 36 229

vote type 1 17 715

By frustrated - 17/08/2013 22:56 - Ireland - Killarney

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

agreeclassic 57 183

vote type 1 7 419

Spooky season

By soccerbuddyz - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. Now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

agreeclassic 60 918

vote type 1 3 805