sept_ember

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Sept_ember's favorite FMLs

By me - 13/01/2011 20:48 - United States

Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML

agreeclassic 39 224

vote type 1 7 782

By espylone - 17/12/2011 15:42 - France

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

agreeclassic 37 156

vote type 1 6 498

By HOe HOe HOe - 02/11/2011 02:36 - United States

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

agreeclassic 37 110

vote type 1 16 281

By Anonymous - 20/08/2011 04:41 - United States

Today, during our wedding, my wife tried to dodge The Kiss. FML

agreeclassic 56 702

vote type 1 4 151

By candymansvan17 - 17/08/2011 21:50 - United States

Today, I had a cop pull me over because he claimed that he saw me taking a bunch of colorful pills at the previous stop sign. I was eating skittles. FML

agreeclassic 44 480

vote type 1 3 240