Intimacy: Today, I found out my girlfriend is a full-on, wants-to-be-banged-by-a-horse...

At least she doesn't want you to wear a ski mask and bang her while she resists. That girl was trying to trick me into a legal situation. sneaky... verrry sneaky

SadFox 16

Monday 14 December 2015 4:55

Dump her ass man. Anyone like that is not worth keeping, that's like "ascended" level ****** up.

Spencer_40 14

Monday 14 December 2015 5:34

I would say "bye you discusting peice of shit"

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, a friend was over at my house. My dad walks over and talks to me; I respond. He then goes back in his room. My friend then says, "Don’t get self-conscious, but when you talk to your dad, your southern accent gets REALLY strong." Guess who's now self-conscious. FML

agreeclassic 822

vote type 1 174

Today, I started playing footsie with the girl I like next to me in Biology. Turns out it was the table leg. FML

agreeclassic 590

vote type 1 1 977

Today, I was complaining to my best friend about my weird cousin and how annoying he is whenever I see him (which isn't often, thankfully). She replied, “Isn’t that my boyfriend you're talking about?” Turns out, yes. Yes, he is. FML

agreeclassic 191

vote type 1 399

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

agreeclassic 63 663

vote type 1 6 934

Today, I argued with my mom that I deserved enough independence to ride my bike to school. Halfway there, I realized I was so out of shape that I had to call her for a ride. FML

agreeclassic 524

vote type 1 1 851

Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the stuff I already knew, he told me never to use Durex condoms. He said, "They break a lot. That's the only reason you're around today, really." then chuckled to himself. FML

agreeclassic 61 086

vote type 1 5 838