Miscellaneous: Finger lickin'

Finger lickin'

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Brecksville

Today, I smelled chicken nuggets and asked my boyfriend if he was making some. He wasn't. It was my armpits. FML

agreeclassic 24 601

vote type 1 43 896

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By isoheartcaitlin - 25/08/2009 03:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML

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By fartlover - 27/11/2009 05:10 - Canada

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML

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By Noname - 16/01/2009 20:43 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML

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By broke_otaku - 09/08/2009 04:21 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me to sniff his armpit to see if he was the one who smelled. I did because we are that comfortable with us. After a couple of sniffs I heard laughter. I forgot I was sitting in his living room and his family was watching me the whole time. I am now the BO finder. FML

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By Reliena - 21/01/2012 05:47 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were in the shower, we began to get a bit frisky. That was until I lifted my arms and he immediately made one of his "Chewbacca Calls." He was referring to my armpits that I had forgotten to shave. FML

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By Anonymous - 15/12/2009 04:16 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me why girls don't have armpit hair. FML

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By not chicken spaghetti - 18/12/2016 23:58 - United States - Clarksville

Today, while cooking supper with my boyfriend, we both smelled something funny. He tasted the sauce I was making, then asked me to taste it because something was off. I guess the burned Teflon of our cheap pot mixed with Ro-Tel just doesn't work that well. Now we're having dry chicken and plain noodles. FML

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By sausagefingers - 22/10/2012 05:29 - United States - Nixa

Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML

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By Maria - 14/03/2017 15:00 - United Kingdom - York

Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML

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By samantha - 27/01/2010 14:05 - Singapore

Today, I was sick with the flu so my boyfriend announced that he would make me some chicken soup. It was touching until I stumbled to the kitchen and found out that his "chicken soup" was actually leftover KFC bones boiled in water. FML

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noobsatin 19

Tuesday 1 October 2013 0:20

that's a bad choice in deodorant.

misspulkadot24 17

Tuesday 1 October 2013 0:21

Except your armpit isn't finger licking good ya nasty. Use some Dove on that shit.

Comments

burritosrgood 12

Thursday 3 October 2013 4:46

I nearly threw up there. I can smell it... OH GOD NO I CAN TASTE IT!

sparklyleopard 9

Saturday 5 October 2013 8:33

I can only imagine what your ****** smells like. Rotting fish sticks...

diarheea101 11

Saturday 12 October 2013 19:30

I'm an ohioan....

LyricaSilvan 29

Wednesday 18 February 2015 22:47

Gross. Deodorant and showers do exist, you know.

ButDatAssDoe 12

Tuesday 3 March 2015 5:58

Musta been one helluva party...

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Wednesday 13 February 2019 19:18

Either you need to change your deodorant or you need to start wearing deodorant.

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML

agreeclassic 30 396

vote type 1 47 368

Today, I noticed my good shampoo was disappearing faster than usual. My boyfriend is bald so I just thought I was being silly, until I tried to join him in the shower for sexy time and found him using the shampoo on his balls and ass crack. FML

agreeclassic 1 252

vote type 1 276

Today, an old guy got nose to nose with me, threatened me, and spit in my face, just because I politely reminded him he needed to be wearing a mask. He had been coughing on multiple food items in my store. FML

agreeclassic 1 967

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Today, my boyfriend beat me and my whole family at Scrabble using only rude words. Seriously, he got a double word on BUTTOCK, a triple letter on the X in SEX then finally got a double word and 50 points for using all his letters by turning the word IS into CLITORIS. FML

agreeclassic 205

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Today, I had to slowly explain to my brother that spooning has nothing to do with using a spoon to clean out a woman's vagina after sex. FML

agreeclassic 38 610

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Today, I accepted a great job offer I've been working months to earn so I can continue to live with my fiancé here in Poland. I just found out that my work visa was denied. Now I have to fly home to Canada and reapply before coming back. This takes a month. My new job starts tomorrow. FML

agreeclassic 32 963

vote type 1 3 543

Finger lickin'

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