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OP here. Thanks lol. That's actually exactly what I was doing. I'm only 21, and I work in a very professional office, and I always need to look my best. I can't afford new shoes at the time, so that's why I sharpied them.

By whatawaste - 07/03/2012 16:25 - United States

Today, I went to the dorm showers to use the facilities. As I was getting in the shower, I slipped and landed face first into a puddle. It wasn't water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 180

You deserved it 2 370

chaoticxxxmess tells us more.

chaoticxxxmess 3

Wednesday 7 March 2012 21:10

I was holding on to my towel and I landed on the side my face.

By ohshit - 07/03/2010 17:25 - United States

Today, my fiancé picked which new house he thinks we should live in based on the fact that the bathroom was set up in such a way that he can drink himself in to a stupor, then use the toilet and puke in the sink at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 780

You deserved it 5 685

By LiquorChick - 20/01/2012 08:23 - United States

Today, I was transporting liquor between stores for work. A car pulled out and cut me off, causing me to slam on my brakes. My car stopped. The 200 dollars-worth of booze did not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 504

You deserved it 3 553

Ouch

By footbloodfountain - 15/01/2012 10:53 - Canada

Today, I realized why buying clear pins for the wall is a bad idea. If one falls out, you won't be able to see it with your eyes, but your foot will find it just fine. I also learnt foot wounds can produce a pretty significant geyser of blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 228

You deserved it 6 738

As you were

By ryan and Zack - 25/02/2010 22:30 - United States

Today, I walked over to my grandmother's house to pay her a visit. I politely knocked on the door, and there was no answer. Fearing that something had happened, I violently broke down the door to find my grandma and her new 80 year-old boyfriend having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 342

You deserved it 8 014

By annoyed - 22/01/2015 20:23 - United States - Berkeley

Today, I was diagnosed with gonorrhea. My dad's reaction was to slowly clap at the news then giggle at his own joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 582

You deserved it 10 214

By anonymous1 - 14/06/2009 00:43 - United States

Today, my sister and I got fitted for bridesmaid's dresses. It was pretty sheer material, so I took off my bright pink thong and left it on the changing room hanger. As I was looking at myself in the mirror, a woman came out of the room holding my thong. She had tried it on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 713

You deserved it 11 025

By rainbows? more like shitstorms - 17/08/2012 00:22 - United States

Today, I was suntanning outside, when I had a bout of nausea. I rushed to the toilet, hoping at all costs to just dry-heave it away. When I lifted the lid, I was faced with two of the most rancid floaters I've ever seen, courtesy of my live-in gran. Well, my stomach's empty now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 779

You deserved it 2 070

By chubbyg - 20/09/2014 12:23 - Australia - Clarinda

Today, my boyfriend asked me when I was going to shave my arms now that summer is coming in Australia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 366

You deserved it 6 479

By News-print Face Kate - 18/07/2012 16:37 - United Kingdom

Today, a man slapped me in the face with his newspaper because I didn't get out of his way fast enough at the train station. I guess he didn't notice I was on crutches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 986

You deserved it 1 883

By pottyhostage - 08/11/2010 21:26 - Sweden

Today, I freaked out when I couldn't get my bathroom door open. After ten minutes of panic when thinking about how I'd be stuck there for at least 8 hours until my roommate would get home, and another five mentally going over survival skills, I realized that I had forgotten to unlock the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 893

You deserved it 45 139

Thanks for sharing

By uni life - 15/05/2012 08:08 - Australia - Perth

Today, whilst working in a pharmacy, I was given the pleasure of listening to an old lady share the details of what she sticks up her vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 260

You deserved it 2 856

By Anonymous - 19/07/2015 04:36 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be hilarious to secretly swap her and my mom's numbers in my phone, then sexually tease me before going to work. I found out about the prank when I texted my "girlfriend", saying I was going to fuck her so hard she wouldn't walk straight for days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 312

You deserved it 5 034

By 8to10days - 05/08/2010 11:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I received a new debit card, so I cut the old one into pieces. I then picked up my remaining card, and realized I'd cut up the wrong one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 886

You deserved it 54 944

By justin Bieber - 15/06/2015 14:49 - United States - Westland

Today, I was on a boat and I thought I saw a towel fly off, but it was actually my fricken dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 210

You deserved it 5 519

By kitty91 - 03/03/2014 01:14 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I ran into a friend I hadn't seen in a while, but I had heard she was pregnant. I rubbed her belly and asked when she was due. She slowly backed away, giving me a weird look and said, "Two months ago." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 830

You deserved it 19 776

kitty91_fml tells us more.

kitty91_fml 7

Tuesday 4 March 2014 10:08

Why does everyone just assume we're not close friends? She's actually one of my best friends. I hadn't seen her in a while because I was out of the country and I knew she would be ok with me rubbing her belly because with her first pregnancy she always wanted me to touch her belly. It would've been awkward if she hadn't burst out laughing. We ended laughing so hard at my stupidity that we cried.

By sashimi9999 - 07/02/2014 01:32 - United States - Salinas

Today, while cleaning a carpet in my house, something in it sliced my foot. I couldn't find what it was, so I went to clean the wound. 10 minutes later, I sliced my foot again on the same thing. I still can't figure out what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 263

You deserved it 5 886