Party and Love: Dick move - FML

Dick move

By Noname - 29/04/2026 06:00 - United States

Today, I was at a fraternity party, and one of the hosts said over the loudspeaker, "Turn to the person next to you and picture them naked, then drink a beer if the mental image disturbs you." I turned, only to be face-to-face with my ex-boyfriend. He drank two beers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 358

You deserved it 5 634

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Random Next FML

Same thing different taste

Caught in the act

By Anonymous - 12/08/2021 14:01

Today, I went to a party and saw my current boyfriend making out with my ex-boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 279

You deserved it 144

Strategic

By Anonymous - 07/06/2009 13:50 - South Africa

Today, I went to a huge party. My ex boyfriend was there who I still have feelings for, so I decided to make him jealous by making out with the really drunk guy next to me. While we were making out, he threw up in my mouth and all over me. Everybody found it hysterical including my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 774

You deserved it 95 458

By Anonymous - 13/02/2013 05:07 - United States - Topeka

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. I'm nervous around them so he encouraged me to drink so I'd loosen up. I got so drunk I tore up all the things in his old room I thought were from ex-girlfriends and accidentally flashed his dad my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 572

You deserved it 56 825

Date night

By Anonymous - 30/04/2011 05:21 - United States

Today, I went out on a date with an ex-boyfriend who I hadn't seen since college. He took me to a bar, where he was oddly quiet, but drank heavily. When the bartender asked us if we were ok, he replied, "This is my ex-girlfriend. Can you believe she used to be skinny?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 168

You deserved it 7 998

We meet again

By wtfjusthappened - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend from two years ago called and asked to come over. Still being in love with him, I agreed to see him but decided I wasn't drunk enough to handle the stress. After a while of drinking, he said that he really missed me and wanted to be with me. My reply consisted of throwing up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 766

You deserved it 32 272

By Out from Hell - 22/04/2013 22:31 - United States - Woodstock

Today, I got so drunk I called my ex-boyfriend and confessed my love to him. All in front of my current boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 654

You deserved it 76 616

Hey you!

By Noah - 16/08/2016 18:43 - United States - South Haven

Today, I was at a bar with my girlfriend, and I noticed an obnoxious guy from college I used to hang out with. I tried to avoid eye contact, but all of a sudden he shouted, "There's the guy who puked his margarita back into the glass!" Everyone stared. Yup, that was me, just last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 749

You deserved it 2 928

The ex from hell

By welpwelpwelp - 08/07/2015 17:45 - Australia - Canberra

Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 024

You deserved it 1 963

Rubbing it in

By Anonymous - 28/01/2026 03:00

Today, I was at a party at my ex's house; he'd invited the whole team. We of course don't talk, but I just figured out he had a girlfriend. He said it right in my face and laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 119

You deserved it 358

I was the bullet in the relationship

By Anonymous - 10/01/2023 10:00

Today, for the first time in two years, I met my ex-girlfriend. I was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 494

You deserved it 370

Next

Top comments

foulball3 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 22:58

what a ********.. slapped him right?

Hoff 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 23:36

Laugh. He's bitter.

Comments

Norther 1

Wednesday 6 October 2010 7:47

He just did what he was told to!

timothytandem 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 17:16

FRAT-TASTIC!!

Twisted_Angel 17

Tuesday 16 August 2011 20:33

You should have looked at him, drank 3 beers and thrown up.

YDIbigtimebro 4

Sunday 27 November 2011 4:18

Win^

money127 4

Friday 30 December 2011 22:01

He drinks two? You drink three!

insomniac8400 13

Friday 15 June 2012 4:29

frat party dude

Kimitte 1

Saturday 25 August 2012 3:01

You should've drank 10 beers. (Not sure if I used the proper form or drink.)

lulu889x 22

Thursday 4 July 2013 14:09

I would have taken 3 drinks just to out do them

SaintJimmy21 19

Thursday 5 September 2013 20:28

urgh...drop his ass, you can do better for sure!

Kyna_Bitch 16

Thursday 13 February 2014 21:30

Shit happens

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Family Embarrassing Cars Parenting Kids Work Healthy Lifestyle Awkward Love Confused My ex Parents Vacation Money Sex Depression Health Anxiety Mental health Clothes Alcohol Poopoo peepee Ironic Birthday Weddings Transportation Bodyshaming Divorce NSFW

The Top

The Top

Today, out of habit, I said "See you later" to a creepy old male customer who stared at my chest the whole time I was serving him. His response was to wink and say, "Oh, you will." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 861

You deserved it 5 207

Today, at a BBQ, my boyfriend's friend told us, “Oh, this reminds my of the time I got third degree burns on my dick.” He’s been trying to talk to me, and I keep thinking about it how it must look like Freddie Kruger's. I don’t know what I just agreed to help him with, but I’m sure it will be a nightmare. FML

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You deserved it 2 532

Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML

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You deserved it 5 248

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You deserved it 113

Today, I called a suicide prevention hotline. No one picked up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 511

You deserved it 6 938