Teenagers

Unfair

By Anonymous - 20/02/2023 22:00 - United States

Today, I got into trouble for moving my chair around in class, which went on my permanent record, while other people were literally throwing things across the room and being loud but they didn't get in trouble. Tomorrow's my birthday and now my parents won't let me go out, even after I told them what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 872

You deserved it 162

Puppy love

By Anonymous - 03/08/2023 06:00

Today, I had a brain fart moment while asking out a cute guy. I meant to say, "When are you going to let me take you out for coffee?” but what actually came out of my mouth was, “When are you going to let me do you?” He turned bright red and I ran away, and I’m too scared to go back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 318

Let me out of this mess

By Anonymous - 31/07/2023 22:00

Today, I realized I have helicopter parents. They monitor my phone and don't let me have social media or get apps without their permission, give me a screen time limit, and snoop through my texts whenever they want. Then they expect me to trust them. I feel like my house is a prison. FML

I agree, your life sucks 877

You deserved it 377

That's entertainment

By Liam - 12/07/2022 04:00

Today, my son and his girl best friend have been dancing around each other for a year, unwilling to make the first move. It's a great source of entertainment for my wife, while I just want to yell at them to kiss already, but my wife has threatened "CONSEQUENCES" if I ruin the fun she has watching their teen drama. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 223

You deserved it 265

Suitor

By PleaseDontBeSerious - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, my daughter brought home her new boyfriend. He has a neck tattoo, and his life's dream is to be a professional "beer pong player." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 636

You deserved it 3 660

Own it

By Anonymous - 17/02/2023 06:00

Today, I was entertaining my niece at the family lunch by painting my lip with calamari ink. My father told me I looked like Ursula, from The Little Mermaid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 492

You deserved it 377

Outrage monger

By Anonymous - 22/08/2023 20:00

Today, my sister blamed me for everything again. We're twins and have the same friends, but they all like her better because she's an extrovert and I'm an introvert, and I'm sick of her getting mad at me, copying me, blaming me and making my life miserable for no reason. Why does everyone think I'm so pathetic? FML

I agree, your life sucks 721

You deserved it 183

Deranged

By Anonymous - 21/07/2022 04:00

Today, my half-sister lied and told my mom I got a girl at school pregnant. My mom is unreasonable at the best of times, but after a full hour trying to get me to name this nonexistent girl, she's calling every parent from school to check if their daughters are hiding a secret pregnancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 257

You deserved it 100

Teenage riot

By Anonymous - 05/04/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I finally had it with the redneck bully who's been tormenting me. He was repeatedly poking and pinching me and laughing out loud during class, so I slung him to the ground, pinning him. I got suspended. They only called his parents, who never do anything; my "caring" parents are looking into teen boot camp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 615

You deserved it 109

ADHD is a curse

By Anonymous - 11/06/2023 10:00

Today, my teen son's ADHD is so bad that he wandered off WITH my car key and WITHOUT his phone, so I had to get a lift to our family event. When we got back, he was sat watching TV and asked me where I’d been all day. It took everything I had not to scream in his face, "YOUR SISTER'S FUCKING WEDDING!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 906

You deserved it 204

Badass

By Anonymous - 17/05/2025 22:00 - Germany

Today, my little sister beat me at arm-wrestling. I'm a 15 year-old boy and she's 12. It happened in front of our entire extended family and they all laughed hysterically. I tried to act like I let her win, but the truth is that I was trying as hard as I could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 231

What are you guys up to?

By OnlyFecked - 29/12/2021 13:59

Today, my dad discovered my daughter’s OnlyFans account. I’ll let you do the math on that one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 631

You deserved it 330

Smoke signals?

By Anonymous - 15/02/2023 02:00

Today, my dad grounded me. Again. First it was my phone, now my watch. How the hell am I supposed to communicate now? FML

I agree, your life sucks 193

You deserved it 1 195

Steve McQueen would be ashamed

By thatsureshowedme - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I tried being rebellious for the first time in my life by sneaking out past my curfew. I tried to climb out of my bedroom window to stealthily leave the house. I ended up twisting my ankle when I tried to make my "great" escape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 238

You deserved it 30 942

Home renovation

By Anonymous - 22/11/2024 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was cleaning my lazy son’s bedroom when I knocked a full cup out the window, complete with a layer of mould. It landed on the dog, covering him in mouldy, milky coffee. He ran inside, shook it off everywhere, then rolled around to really make sure it was smushed deep into the carpet fibres. FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 308

Teenage Riot

By Anonymous - 03/08/2021 19:59

Today, my teenage son reacted to the news of his cousin's death like I’d just told him a bug got squashed on a car windscreen. He didn’t even look away from his computer screen, or react in any way. He seemed more annoyed that I’d interrupted him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 957

You deserved it 208

Not the sharpest tool

By Mothering - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I took my 16 year-old daughter to get a bank account, taking her birth certificate with us as requested. When the teller wrote her name down on a piece of paper, my daughter said, "How do you know my name?" The teller just looked at her and held up her birth certificate. I raised a nitwit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 576

You deserved it 12 767

Congratulations, you played yourself

By Anonymous - 28/07/2022 12:00

Today, I mistakenly texted my father in-law a photo of all my weed and all the joints I'd rolled. He’s also my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 155

You deserved it 1 571

Uh-oh…

By jlol - 05/03/2015 14:32 - United States

Today, my teacher reached over to hand me a paper. I thought it would be funny to flinch and say, "Dad, please don't hit me". Unfortunately, he didn't think it was a joke, so I got questioned by the on-campus officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 956

You deserved it 47 885

Underage boozing

By drunk under 18 teenager - 19/08/2014 13:37 - Morocco - Marrakech

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was, if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 097

You deserved it 50 329

Teenage riot

By Anonymous - 14/02/2024 06:00 - United States - West Chester

Today, I got dumped by a friend because she said I was "too much." She's treated me like shit and basically ignored me at times since the beginning of the school year, in favor of hanging out with another friend. I guess years of friendship really can disappear overnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 129

Teenagers…

By Anonymous - 09/04/2022 10:00

Today, my 17 year-old is pregnant and I was fit to be furious, until my wife steamrollered over me to get to her, hugging her, and crying and how we’ll all raise it together as a big family. We can’t afford another baby. The daddy better be paying us something, or I’m gone kill him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 139

You deserved it 263

Busted

By far23 - 15/07/2009 19:44 - United States

Today, I had a big party that left my house really messy. I spent hours cleaning the house until it was spotless. When my parents got home, my dad said, "Did you have fun at the party?" I said, "How'd you know?" and he replied, "You hate cleaning and the house was filthy when we left." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 652

You deserved it 53 973

High school drama!

By Anonymous - 21/08/2025 05:00 - United States - Lawton

Today, I dumped my boyfriend before school for not putting enough effort into this relationship. He said okay, and then HE WAS WALKING WITH A WHOLE NEW GIRL AT SCHOOL. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 655

shrinks into corner

By Ally - 24/03/2018 05:00

Today, my dad decided to be an awesome person and fold my laundry without telling me. Later, I heard my parents having a conversation about a pair of panties that were "like dental floss" and which sister they belonged to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 763

You deserved it 672

The struggle is real

By Anonymous - 15/10/2023 08:30

Today, I was lectured by my mom who saw me trying to play on my Switch during a weekday. The thing is, she doesn't even give me any time to play in the week, and then calls me out whenever I try to get a few decent hours on my Meta Quest and Switch during the weekends. Stop dictating me; give me a goddamn break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 446

The pits

By Anonymous - 14/01/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, my mom revoked my shower privileges for a week, all because I'm “using too much water.” I'm the kind of person who will smell like garbage after one skipped shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 649

You deserved it 126

By Anonymous - 16/08/2019 06:00

Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 696

You deserved it 2 669

Cruel and unusual

By unfair! - 24/05/2025 03:00 - United States - Miami

Today, my brother threw his Switch across the room and broke it. Our parents decided that, "Video games are bad!" and took away my Switch, as well as my gaming PC that I built and paid for myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 598

You deserved it 80

Dumbass

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 04:00

Today, my son is an idiot, but I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt by giving him a job as a cashier in one of my stores. Within half an hour, I was sent security footage from that store's manager showing my son on his phone, ignoring customers, picking his nose, and stealing money from the till. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 011

You deserved it 449

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 842

You deserved it 3 411

Today, I had an old man yell in my face because the boxes in our store only had Spanish words on them. I spent 15 minutes apologizing and trying to explain that the English was on the back side. He stormed out before I could even show him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 846

You deserved it 927

Today, I was arrested for kidnapping a child. MY child. Do you know how hard it is as a white man to convince a police officer that a latino toddler screaming, "Stranger danger!" is yours? FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 690

You deserved it 428

Today, I went up to take a shower. I typically go to the bathroom first, I take a mega dump, then flush the toilet. Not only wouldn't the toilet flush but I found out my parents only keep one plunger on hand. It was in the downstairs bathroom. My dad came upstairs and plunged the toilet while I stood there naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 514

You deserved it 300

Today, I had someone place two separate to-go orders, so that he could use two of his "25% off" coupons. He couldn't understand why it wasn't 50% off his total bill, no matter how many times I plainly explained it to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 924

You deserved it 132

Today, I took my first shower in weeks after having had spinal surgery. My sister flushed a toilet. I couldn't reach the nozzle or my cane to get off the shower bench, and all I could do was sit there as scalding hot water sprayed all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 425

You deserved it 2 262