Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, while coming back from skiing, a woman asked me if I could help her carry her stroller. I put my skis down and helped her. When I came back to pick my skis up, I saw two guys running away with my gear. You try chasing someone while wearing ski boots. FML

#18794670
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23841) - you deserved it (2843)

On 01/13/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by magzulism - Reserved

magzulism's comment about their FML

Hey, OP here.
I'm finally gonna answer some of your questions:
1. Yes, i do believe it was a set up. The woman and the thiefs were definitely working together.
2. They were old skis, I bought myself a pair of awesome new ones later :)
3. I didn't go skiing alone. I live in Switzerland and was helping a friend of mine -who is an elementary school teacher- as a skiing instructor for his 9 year old school kids.
He teaches and lives in a tiny village about an hour from where I live, and since I don't have a car, I went there by train. So obviously i rode the train back home alone.

The only good thing about the whole story is that I didn't have to carry my skis back home. ha. ha.
Feel free to message me, if you have any questions.

See all the comments

Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML

#18775728
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40426) - you deserved it (4659)

On 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm - health - by hannaaaahr (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

hannaaaahr's comment about their FML

Sooooo, this was my FML. Sadly, I didn't taste anything, since I didn't drink the water pure, but always mixed in cup-a-soup or something similar. Luckily me and my roommates are fine now, we're all a bit afraid of preparing food though, scared that there might be some kind of rodent in other kitchen devices. Obviously we threw away the water cooker (for those who didn't know what that is, seriously? you couldn't even think of what it 'might' be?) and since we got our new cat, Sammie, we haven't had any mice or rats crawling around! Yaaaay for Sammie!

See all the comments

Today, I spent five dollars on a virtual cat. FML

#18774568
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9016) - you deserved it (36473)

On 01/11/2012 at 11:33am - money - by bobbeta30 - United States (New York)

bobbeta30's comment about their FML

I don't want sympathy, I wanted to get it posted, and I got my wish!

See all the comments including 4 other original poster's reactions

Today, I wolf whistled at a girl. I soon realized this wasn't the best idea I've had, as not only did she give me a look of complete and utter disgust, she also sent a very big man running in my direction. FML

#18739461
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7401) - you deserved it (42227)

On 01/07/2012 at 9:03pm - misc - by ThisIsDCG - United Kingdom (Essex)

ThisIsDCG's comment about their FML

I was fed up of being the nice guy, for once...
Obviously I should stick to being the nice guy...

See all the comments including 3 other original poster's reactions

Today, I ignored my phone, as my mother has dementia and calls me 15 or so times a day, thinking each time is the first. I braved horrendous rain and gale-force winds to go to work. Turns out it was work calling to tell me not to bother coming in. FML

#18696080
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8388) - you deserved it (33031)

On 01/03/2012 at 11:07am - work - by sparkx555 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

sparkx555's comment about their FML

ok, my mother lives with my brother, she is in the early stages of demetia, she's never left alone, i do everything for her, except answer the phone 15 or more times a day to answer the same questions. i do love her, more than anything, but the phone thing, between her and the nusiance sales calls, I feel a little demented myself! And I could have done with the day off, I would have spent it with her.

See all the comments including 6 other original poster's reactions

Today, my older brother burst into my bedroom at 4 am to show me photos of sushi. FML

#18684566
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25306) - you deserved it (2661)

On 01/02/2012 at 8:18am - misc - by jku (man) - United States (Montana)

jku's comment about their FML

Yes. Yes he did. Maybe more ninja-samurai-hybrid style.

See all the comments

Today, my mother was watching me play Pokémon. She walked over to the TV and pulled the plug before ranting about how shameful it is that her 17 year old daughter plays Pokémon. She then sat down at the computer and started playing Farmville. FML

#18594471
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35129) - you deserved it (5356)

On 12/24/2011 at 12:15am - misc - by arrowtopatella (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

arrowtopatella's comment about their FML

Hey guys, I'm the OP of this FML.

I was playing XD- Gale of Darkness, one of my favourites. Alas there is no 'elite 4' as such in the Orre region, I was in the middle of catching a rare Wooper at a PokeSpot which I could have traded for an awesome Larvitar. Sigh. Rich world problems, I know.

And yes, shock horror, I am a female that plays Pokemon, le gasp. And also I do play old-school Mario and stuff, I've been a Nintendo fangirl ever since I was little, occasionally migrating to other consoles to play things like Skyrim (No CoD for me though, thank you very much. Blegh.)

See all the comments including 2 other original poster's reactions

Today, our dog peed on nearly all the wrapped gifts under our Christmas tree. FML

#18581066
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26815) - you deserved it (4477)

On 12/22/2011 at 5:05pm - animals - by shrdlu (man) - United States (New York)

shrdlu's comment about their FML

Nobody else'll want 'em now anyway.

See all the comments including 11 other original poster's reactions

Today, my separation anxiety got so intense, I found myself smelling my boyfriend's pillow. FML

#18566755
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16102) - you deserved it (5966)

On 12/21/2011 at 12:12am - love - by 409sPoisonGirl - Australia

409sPoisonGirl's comment about their FML

Amazing what you find when you're reading the random FMLs...
OP here. Let me explain - at the time this was posted, I was pregnant and suffering from terrible morning sickness. Believe it or not, that worked a treat! And helped me cheer up as well...
To everyone who said their partner is/was in the service, I hope they come home safe and sound. I respect both you and your partners. God bless.

See all the comments including 5 other original poster's reactions

Today, I dropped my 7-year-old son off at school. He decided to have fun and step out of my car screaming "Stranger danger" while running away and pointing at me. I then had to get out of my car to shut the door he'd left wide open. This caused 20 other kids to scream "Stranger danger" as well. FML

#18551732
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24641) - you deserved it (2271)

On 12/19/2011 at 7:24am - kids - by dealingdave - United States (Missouri)

dealingdave's comment about their FML

I did not ground the boy. I simply told him his entire life belongs to me now until he's 18!

See all the comments



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: