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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, I got stuck in the bathroom with no toilet paper. I had to reach into my small trash can and use soiled toilet paper to clean myself. When I went to flush the toilet, I noticed three unused rolls of toilet paper sitting on the counter. FML

#20921639
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18897) - you deserved it (47457)

On 10/15/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by calobrisi - United States (New York)

calobrisi's comment about their FML

OP Here! So I think everyone has kind of made this worse then it really was so let me explain. I am a girl, and I was in my own house. I was in a rush and didn't realize there was toilet paper right behind me on the toilet until afterwards. I couldn't get up or use something else because there was nothing else, and my father was home with me but we are not on speaking terms.The paper I used would certainly not give me any STD's because I had used it beforehand. Of course I realize what a dumbass I am, and honestly most of the comments made me laugh. But yeah it wasn't like I was "taking a shit" or anything. I probably should have "looked before I leaked." Thanks guys lol

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Today, I found out that my brother is adamant that if he records silence, then listens to said silence at full volume, it'll improve the headphones' noise-blocking abilities. I live with a complete idiot. FML

#20921378
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37772) - you deserved it (2927)

On 10/15/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by Eggs6131 (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Eggs6131's comment about their FML

For all the people who don't get it, my brother recorded about a minute's worth of silence on his little MP3 player, so he could listen to said recording at full volume. He thought if he listened to this recording of nothingness on a loop at full volume, it would make his earphones act like earplugs, cancelling out any noise made.

#8, still laughing at that "I'm sorry? I can't hear you for all this silence blasting in my ears".
#22, he's fifteen :\

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Today, my mom made fun of me because I'm 16 and have never had a boyfriend, then bragged that at my age she was already pregnant with me. FML

#20918137
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56829) - you deserved it (3314)

On 10/12/2013 at 9:59pm - misc - by roundtherose - United States (Alaska)

roundtherose's comment about their FML

Thank you everyone for then encouraging words and sympathy for me. I would like to say my mom is one of the greatest people in my life and is very intelligent. She had been dating my dad for 2 years before and they got married and they are still married. She is certainly not a dead-beat mom. I think she was just being spiteful when that happened. She apologized later. She taught me that what she did is not what I want to do in my life.
Sure what she said got me down, but outside dating I have a great life!

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Today, I went home after work with my best friend who I am also secretly in love with. We had a few drinks, were getting touchy, and one thing led to another. Before leaving, I got the courage to ask her out on a real date. Her only reply was, "I don't want to lose such a good friend." FML

#20917529
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57274) - you deserved it (6619)

On 10/12/2013 at 11:31am - intimacy - by Medication - United States

Medication's comment about their FML

I didn't have an account when I posted this, but I'm the OP, and honestly,
during our drunken state, I mustered up enough sobriety to prevent things from going too far.
I as well, didn't want to ruin things between us by having sex because I respected her too much, and wanted more than that.
Was it the right thing to do, or was I just being a dumbass?
One commenter was correct in stating that she was confused as to what she really wanted.
Either way, we've talked it out, and moved over that.
It's better anyways maybe, considering we both work together and I have to go on months long deployments with this girl, haha.
:]

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Today, for the first time in months, a woman started flirting with me. She was wearing a sparkly shirt with "Team Edward" written on it. FML

#20915931
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40735) - you deserved it (4569)

On 10/10/2013 at 11:50pm - love - by CreamGravy (man) - Australia

CreamGravy's comment about their FML

My whole love life seems to just be one big FML doesn't it?

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Today, my boyfriend blew me off yet again because he claims he has a responsibility as a "crew leader" to train and recruit members at all times, to accommodate all time zones. GTA V is ruining our relationship. FML

#20914020
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46692) - you deserved it (7520)

On 10/09/2013 at 4:16pm - love - by carla6991 - United States (Florida)

carla6991's comment about their FML

I actually do play with him and am commissioner of the crew and am a bit of a gamer myself. However, I require a bit more than 2 hours of sleep and don't feel like playing during every bit of spare time I have. We had a talk about it last night though and he agreed to cut down when I'm home from work so we'll see!

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Today, I realized I can't afford to break up with my boyfriend of 2 years, as we split the rent. I'll need a second job just to get out of my bad relationship. FML

#20913912
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41426) - you deserved it (7608)

On 10/09/2013 at 2:25pm - love - by emopoe - United States (Oregon)

emopoe's comment about their FML

OP here. I can't live with a room mate, did that for 4 years and learned a lot about what happens when your roomie doesn't come up with their half of rent, and lost way too many friends that way. It would be worse than what I'm dealing with now. Our apartment is already the cheapest in town, I don't have parents or friends to move in with. The bright side is, my boyfriend is NOT abusive. And to the nasty comments that say YDI for using him for money, I clearly stated we split the rent.

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Today, I again failed to convince my girlfriend that the $100 in our account is the minimum amount we have keep there to avoid being charged by the bank. We have a joint checking account, and the only way to take her off it is to close the account outright. FML

#20913893
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34336) - you deserved it (7243)

On 10/09/2013 at 2:02pm - money - by BlindInTheDark (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

BlindInTheDark's comment about their FML

Hey everyone,
I see a lot of people in favor of the "close it outright" option, but of course I forgot to mention that in order to do so, we both have to go in and agree to close it. The only reason didn't do that ages ago is because I haven't come up with a way to convince her it's for the best, and since I DO plan to commit to her, I don't want to upset her.

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Today, my brother finally informed me that our shower head has an option to make the water only come out of the detachable part. My left leg's been in a cast for 4 months, and the whole time I've had to shower sitting backwards with my leg sticking out the door. He knew. FML

#20913856
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35593) - you deserved it (6428)

On 10/09/2013 at 1:26pm - health - by Ixiion (woman) - United States (New York)

Ixiion's comment about their FML

OP here. Just to clear something up: The shower head is new. It was put in two weeks before my leg ended up in a cast. So I hadn't bothered to fiddle with it before, thus why I didn't know that it had that option. And I've been whining about it for 4 months, and he just now decided to tell me. Ah, love my brother. And to someone who said to give him a break, I am. I just glared at him for 10 minutes before letting it go.

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Today, I got my two-year-old's Halloween costume in the mail. I tried it on him to make sure it fit. He loves it so much that he is now having a complete meltdown because he wants to go trick-or-treating. He doesn't understand we only go trick-or-treating on Halloween. 23 more days to go. FML

#20912707
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35600) - you deserved it (5785)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:04pm - kids - by mattrd (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

mattrd's comment about their FML

OP here! First off, for all the people inquiring about what the costume is, it is a plush dinosaur that his legs go into and his upper half sticks out of it. You can see a picture of it if you search "dinosaur" at costume express. And the issue isnt that he loves the costume, in fact he hated putting it on at first. The issue is that he wants candy and he wants candy RIGHT NOW. Thanks for all the suggestions. But now that a day has gone by, the costume is in a closet and he seems to have forgotten all about it.

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Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time after we made up from a huge fight. He loves my cat, but she's sick right now so she wouldn't play with him. He yelled at me for "making" her not like him by "telling her lies". FML

#20910894
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46888) - you deserved it (4794)

On 10/07/2013 at 12:20pm - animals - by littlekellilee (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

littlekellilee's comment about their FML

Thanks for the kind words towards my cat, she's feeling much better!

The comments were all hilarious! I think he was just still feeling sensitive about the fight because he apologized shortly after and admitted to acting crazy. I think I'll probably keep him around, he's a pretty good guy usually and definitely hasn't done this before. I'll keep an eye out though. Thanks everyone!

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Today, I repeatedly had to ask people to please stop groping the mannequins. FML

#20909955
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36984) - you deserved it (2762)

On 10/06/2013 at 6:28pm - work - by WhyMe6495 - United States (New York)

WhyMe6495's comment about their FML

I work at Kmart and yes this has happened a few times already and i've only worked there for one month

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Today, I told my coworkers that I was going on a date tonight so they would think I have a social life. One of them spotted me while I was eating alone at McDonalds. FML

#20909380
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41072) - you deserved it (28401)

On 10/06/2013 at 9:54am - work - by CreamGravy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

CreamGravy's comment about their FML

Well to be honest I made the whole thing up because I got tired of being that one guy at work who can't get a girlfriend. It's a small place, there are only 8 of us who work there, and I'm the only one that's single, so I get jokes about it quite a lot. They're nothing bad, I know it's all in fun, but yesterday someone made yet another joke about it and for some reason I just blurted out that I had a date tonight. As soon as I did I figured might as well go with the story, so when I got questioned about it I made up a fake name and description for the girl as well.

The best part is that I told everyone I was taking her to this really fancy and expensive restaurant, so when they saw me at McDonalds it was ironic actually. Luckily for me today is a holiday, but I have a feeling tomorrow the mocking is going to be worse than ever.

I voted YDI by the way.

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