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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, I got fired for saving my company upwards of $6,000. I'm as confused as you are. FML

#20075906
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24363) - you deserved it (1717)

On 09/17/2012 at 6:46am - work - by Grindwhore - Canada (British Columbia)

Grindwhore's comment about their FML

They have yet to give me a reason why, I'm still confused as hell.

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Today, I was happy to finally receive an email from my younger sister, whom I have not been able to talk to for months due to being in the military stationed overseas. The email was to tell me my mom is in jail. FML

#20071203
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20026) - you deserved it (1181)

On 09/14/2012 at 1:57am - work - by HeyArnold91 - United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East)

HeyArnold91's comment about their FML

Theft of property

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Today, I invited my boyfriend to his first dinner out with my family. As my older brother was discussing the injuries he'd received while working as a tow truck driver, my innocent 10 year old brother piped up saying he should see what I did to my boyfriend's back with my nails. FML

#20070191
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13983) - you deserved it (3184)

On 09/13/2012 at 1:03pm - kids - by SerendipityRose - United States (California)

SerendipityRose's comment about their FML

He didn't actually show him specifically, TJ had his shirt off at the house & my little brother saw his back... He asked what happened & said that TJ got his butt kicked by a girl. It was a harmless joke & look where it got us. So mortifying...

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Today, I came home from work to be given $1 by my mother. This normally would have been nice, had my mother not said, "I just sold that ugly old black and white picture frame you always leave lying around in your room." Which also would have been nice if that "frame" wasn't my Kindle. FML

#20068581
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28935) - you deserved it (1292)

On 09/12/2012 at 4:44am - money - by humorizer - United States (Texas)

humorizer's comment about their FML

^ Yard sale.

My parents always complain that I hoard too much junk (they never get the idea behind why I have so many different controllers for my NES, SNES, Genesis, N64, Wii, PS3, Xbox, Xbox 360, etc)... and demand that I throw away all the controllers and only keep "one or two since that's all you need".

And don't get me started on chargers... they think all I need is one single charger to take care of my multitude of laptops and game consoles and cameras...

So when they see a 'worthless picture frame' (which I believe had an image of the Bronte sisters as the default on the lock screen the last time I saw it), they think they're doing me a favor by getting me money by selling a 'picture frame [I] just leave laying around on the floor'.

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Today, I was assigned to write a short story about what we imagine Earth to be like in 500 years, and daily conflicts people experience. My teacher loved it and read it aloud to the class. He asked for my inspiration, and I didn't have the heart to say that I ripped off Mass Effect 3. FML

#20068410
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7197) - you deserved it (20769)

On 09/12/2012 at 12:24am - misc - by brianfantana32 - United States (Washington)

brianfantana32's comment about their FML

This. This is more of a morality issue than a legal issue. I didn't take it word for word (even though that's hard to do since it's a video game and not a book), I just used the concept.

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Today, I decided to be a gentleman and let an old lady have my seat on the bus. Before I could even get up, she sat on my lap and wouldn't get off. I got an involuntary lap dance from a grandma. FML

#20067929
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20720) - you deserved it (1639)

On 09/11/2012 at 7:07pm - misc - by tdudey123 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

tdudey123's comment about their FML

I'm just gonna comment for the badge :P And yes, she was moving around, due to the bus rattling around (I hope).

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Today, while I was leaving the grocery store, I realized my ignition key was missing from my pocket. After searching the car and retracing my steps, I walked all the way home. Later, when we went to retrieve the car, the key was sitting in plain sight on the passenger seat. FML

#20067730
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5311) - you deserved it (17538)

On 09/11/2012 at 4:41pm - misc - by stadams1024 - United States (Michigan)

stadams1024's comment about their FML

I am the OP.

Let me explain the situation more in depth since I only had 300 characters to do so before.

My husband had lost his car keys, so I gave him my set and I took the spare lock key and the spare ignition key. I needed to get some groceries and he was at work, so I just went. Before I got out of the car to go inside, I put the keys in my sweatshirt pocket and got out. I got my groceries and came back out to the car, and yes it was in the same spot. I reached in my pocket to pull out my keys and only the lock key was there. I unlocked the car and immediately searched both the front seats, under the seats, in the cracks between the seats and even the back seat. I looked under the car and in the ignition too. I retraced my steps in the store three times and then checked my car again. I asked the service desk if anyone turned in a loose key, but no one had. I called my husband but he couldn't leave to pick me up, so I walked 4 miles home. The walk itself wouldn't have been so horrible had I not broken my foot a few months ago; it still bothers me, and there weren't any sidewalks half the way, so I kept twisting my ankle in holes in the ground. After my husband came home from work, he took me back to the store with his keys and I drove home. It wasn't until a week or so later that I actually found the key in the passenger seat, close to where the back of the cushion and the seat of the cushion met. There is no way I could have missed it when I searched for it and I had driven it a handful of times between the incident and when I found it. It literally appeared out of thin air and it still baffles me.

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Today, I was trying to pass a lady with a stroller, when she nearly fell. I used my ninja-like reflexes to catch her. Too bad my ninja-like reflexes didn't block the punch that she delivered to my fap-stick for apparently being a "pervert" for saving her. FML

#20066689
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19037) - you deserved it (1988)

On 09/10/2012 at 8:42pm - misc - by CaptainSaveAHoe (man) - United States (California)

CaptainSaveAHoe's comment about their FML

so I planned for her to slip so I could mug her? the amount of logic in this comment is astounding.

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Today, I realized that my manager and I have synchronized menstrual cycles. She gets extremely bitchy, and I get extremely vulnerable and emotional - she yells at me and I burst into tears. FML

#20065261
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21267) - you deserved it (1594)

On 09/09/2012 at 8:39pm - work - by darawbs - United States

darawbs's comment about their FML

Haha I'm glad I entertained you.

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Today, for the third day in a row, my 10-month-old is refusing to eat any of the meals that I prepare for him. He will however eat anything semi-edible lying on the floor, cat kibble included. FML

#20061876
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15317) - you deserved it (1715)

On 09/07/2012 at 2:19pm - kids - by amusedslovenia (woman) - Slovenia

amusedslovenia's comment about their FML

OP here...

My son is 10 months old. I'm really at my wits' end. He had been a good eater from the start, unlike his older brother who I couldn't get to eat anything either. I set out to feed my kids all organic, home-made, fresh and so forth. I gave up with my first after having spent literally hours a day preparing healthy, nutritious and yes, tasty foods that he wouldn't touch beyond a spoon or two.

My two year old grew fine on very little food and now eats the same we do. My younger. however, is tiny for his age - he wears clothes for 3mo (but developing normally, thank God, and the pedi's not concerned). I can only get him to taste a spoon of something and then it's over. But anything he picks up from the floor (bread crumbs, and yes, cat kibble (food), he will eat. And scream when I take it away from him.

Maybe he's on a strike or teething or... I don't know. Maybe I should start placing food on the floor for him LOL.

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Today, the acne on one side of my face has flared up at the corners of my mouth, making me look just like The Joker. FML

#20060412
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21160) - you deserved it (1869)

On 09/06/2012 at 12:54pm - health - by onorexveritas - United States (California)

onorexveritas's comment about their FML

it sucks ass lmao but its kina funny to look at xD

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Today, I'm so broke that I hand-washed my socks with a bar of soap that I stole from work. FML

#20058884
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21510) - you deserved it (2245)

On 09/05/2012 at 2:27pm - money - by Lauraborealous - Canada (Alberta)

Lauraborealous's comment about their FML

for those saying that I should have stolen laundry soap or similar, i work at a restaurant, this wouldn't be possible

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Today, I found out that the "vines" I was cutting down this morning were actually poison oak. I can only see out of one eye, and I'm virtually unrecognizable due to the facial swelling. FML

#20052545
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15003) - you deserved it (2439)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:37pm - health - by merissa22 - United States (Illinois)

merissa22's comment about their FML

nothing like a shot in my ass after trying to sum up the courage to go out in public won't help

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