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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, a customer wanted a military discount for buying two 39 cent Slim Jims. I work at an auto parts store. FML

#20854690
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34685) - you deserved it (3289)

On 08/26/2013 at 1:51am - work - by luvmypony (woman) - United States (California)

luvmypony's comment about their FML

I can't give discounts on something so cheap. company policy

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Today, my boyfriend and I are on camping vacation. On my way out of the tent, I stepped in a pile of shit. When I told him, he said, "Oh, I couldn't make it to the bathroom last night." The bathroom was a minute walk from our tent. FML

#20853384
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43152) - you deserved it (3582)

On 08/25/2013 at 5:13am - misc - by justash12 - United States (New Jersey)

justash12's comment about their FML

OP here following up with some details! I can not get the image of him crouching in front of the tent and taking a shit out of my head! Yes, it was a shitty situation. No, I haven't dumped him. Shoes were on! We were at a public campground, down the shore. The bathrooms have toilets, showers, sinks, and TP.

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Today, like every day for the past 6 months, I got a call from the same telemarketers. I've been ignoring the calls, so now they've started leaving me voicemails. I can't get rid of the annoying voicemail icon on my phone without making a call, so I have to pay to listen to their offers. FML

#20852812
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35988) - you deserved it (5244)

On 08/24/2013 at 11:27am - money - by Sinkhole (woman) - Guatemala (Guatemala)

Sinkhole's comment about their FML

So, to answer people's comments:

I'm not really going to change numbers, because I've already changed my number like 4 times for unrelated reasons, and I'm tired of changing it. I don't have a contract phone, and blocking numbers through the phone company is more hassle than it's worth, and probably wouldn't work anyway. I have no smartphone, so I can't just get an app. Not gonna take legal action against them because this is not a sue happy country. I have already told them not to call me, many many times (would be stupid not to have tried that already). After six months of two or three calls from them a day, ignoring them is not as easy as it sounds. There is no "do not call" list in my country.

The most ridiculous thing is that they're trying to sell me some English courses, and I've told them I don't even need them, but of course, they just want to sell.

I'll have to muster up the courage to pick up the phone and play loud and freaky porn for them in the background until they decide I'm a deranged individual who shouldn't be messed with.

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Today, I attended my first day of school 4 days after reconstructive surgery. But no worries: I'm sure my alien-like appearance and 2 hours of Darth Vader style breathing in an otherwise silent test room will make me lots of friends. FML

#20851672
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41032) - you deserved it (3217)

On 08/24/2013 at 12:25am - misc - by carobee (woman) - United States (Washington)

carobee's comment about their FML

Hi, OP here! I had an accident, and therefore could not choose the date of the surgery. My face was severely smashed up, my nose broken and my jaw wired shut. It was a summer class and I missed the first 3 days, so by the time I was well enough to go they were already testing. The class was a pre-req I needed for my next year of class, my senior year. I didn't want to graduate late from college, as I am a pre med student and want to take the mcat next summer. I was not seriously worried about making friends, it was just funny to get so many strange looks. Anyway thanks for all the sweet comments, I'm doing much better now and look back to normal!!

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Today, at work, two teenage girls caused a huge scene and told me to get lost, after I asked if they needed any help. Their reasoning: they didn't want to be helped by "someone who doesn't have a thigh gap." FML

#20851191
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48555) - you deserved it (3257)

On 08/23/2013 at 6:21pm - misc - by Hannahb17 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Hannahb17's comment about their FML

For those of you who are wondering, I'm 17 and I work at Forever 21. I asked the two girls if they needed any help and they said, "Umm.. We don't want YOUR help." I said, "Excuse me?" They said, "OMG WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE? WE DON'T WANT YOUR HELP! CAN WE GET SOMEONE ELSE TO HELP US?" At that point a manager came over to see what the problem was and the girls said, "We don't want her help. She doesn't even have a thigh gap. Why does she even work here?" Not wanting to do anything stupid and lose my job, I walked away. The two girls had to have been only a year or two younger than me. Plot twist: THEY DIDN'T HAVE FREAKING THIGH GAPS! I can't explain to y'all how much that irked me. The whole thing was just stupid. I really like working at Forever 21, though, so I'm glad I didn't do anything to jeopardize that. Well, thank you all for the supportive comments! They were fun to read. (: I hope y'all have a great night/day!

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Today, I was at the library. I had to use the restroom, where I ended up singing in bad, made-up Japanese the whole time. When I went back across the library, my brother informed me that everyone could clearly hear me. FML

#20850306
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20097) - you deserved it (38918)

On 08/23/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by Singer_Song - United States

Singer_Song's comment about their FML

I'm the OP. The reason I say Japanese specifically is because I do know a few words and included them in the song. I do love anime. I'm actually a really good singer, I've bee compared to Evanescance (I'm not trying to show off I have no reason to show off to online strangers). I was singing because I had a tune in my head and was being silly. Also the restroom is in the back of the Library so I didn't think it would go that far. I didn't know because not a single person made a face or anything.

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Today, my mom put me in charge of her business's Facebook. Later, I was doing homework and took a Facebook break, changing my status to "So fucking boring." I'd forgotten to log out of the business account. FML

#20849993
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18200) - you deserved it (53346)

On 08/22/2013 at 10:05pm - work - by ShadowReiku (woman) - United States (Maryland)

ShadowReiku's comment about their FML

Hey guys. I did realize my mistake very shortly after and deleted the status before anyone caught it. My mom's business is still getting off the ground and so I would be very surprised to find out that anyone at all saw it before it was deleted. As for no one caring, my facebook is only for very close friends, so I wasn't expecting any likes or anything - just any reprieve from the dullness of what I was doing. This was not really an end of the world thing, just a little "Oh shit" moment I thought I'd share.

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Today, as I was walking downstairs to get breakfast, I saw my parents had decided to have a quickie on the couch. I had to awkwardly stand out of sight on the stairs, too scared to go down, or even back up, because our stairs creak. FML

#20847774
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54757) - you deserved it (4392)

On 08/21/2013 at 12:27pm - intimacy - by Stinkipinkki - United States (Texas)

Stinkipinkki's comment about their FML

Hey everyone!
I loved reading your comments. The good, the bad, and even the ugly. Let me just clear up that it was my moms birthday, so I came down early to wake her up with breakfast. I wasn't coming down to listen like a pervert. I am very glad my parents are still fond of each other but I experienced just a tad too much of this fondness. I know realize that I could of walked back up and try not to squeak on the stairs, but come on. I wasn't really thinking at that point, mostly freaking out!
Thanks everyone and no I didn't have my camera to save the picture as blackmail ;)

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Today, I met up with my estranged father for the first time in almost 15 years. I saw him again later, while he was robbing my house. FML

#20847212
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46608) - you deserved it (2763)

On 08/21/2013 at 12:06am - misc - by MissCharlotte (woman) - United States (Illinois)

MissCharlotte's comment about their FML

Hi everyone, I am the OP. I am so glad this got published!! Also, all of these coments are great :) To add more to the story: My sister and I went out to lunch with my dad because he was in town and wanted to see us. He seemed to have changed since he divorced my mom 15 years ago, so we let him drive us home, which is how he knew where our apartment was. Later that night, I heard noises in our apartment, so my badass sister tackled him and pepper-sprayed him as he was trying to pick up our TV. He was aressted (he actually had a knife) and we are getting a restraining order against him.

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Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML

#20846451
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53060) - you deserved it (5957)

On 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by aly55a_mariie (woman) - United States (California)

aly55a_mariie's comment about their FML

LOL they definitely weren't lying when they said the internet could be brutal. First off, I have ten other tattoos and this is the first time something like this has happened. I take great care in all of my tattoos. I would like to think of myself as an incredibly clean person. Anal to a certain extent. I live with a very talented and successful tattoo artist. He too was freaked out waking up to ants in our bed. I didn't use anything scented. Just the typical A&D ointment. It was not infected nor did it get infected. It was just one of those crappy things that happen to people. I have had another tattoo since then and am happy to say there was no ant attack this time! But thanks everyone for your comments and likes! And for those that don't think you can see a tattoo in your future, please don't let this be the reason! I highly doubt this is a common occurance. Thanks again everyone and have a great day!

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Today, I walked in on my brother smoking weed. He immediately tried to hide it by dropping it down his pants, still lit. Screaming in pain, he pulled down his pants. The ashes burned his knob. I had to take him to the emergency room. FML

#20845220
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39940) - you deserved it (3136)

On 08/19/2013 at 7:29pm - misc - by bluerhhajfk - United States (Rhode Island)

bluerhhajfk's comment about their FML

Apparently his friend gave him some to try. He's only 14 so I don't think he knew any better. He told me he was experimenting, and I think that's an okay thing to do so long as he learned his lesson. He is just a young stupid teenager.

Moral of the story: Don't do drugs, kids. Or you'll burn your penises.

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Today, my spouse asked me if I could transfer some of the passion I have for buffalo wings into our relationship. FML

#20845198
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24985) - you deserved it (33205)

On 08/19/2013 at 7:15pm - love - by sirradel - United States

sirradel's comment about their FML

OP here guys!
Just for your information, I'm a woman and my spouse is a man.

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Today, I found out I'm pregnant. I told my boyfriend and my close family, who were all ecstatic. Then he told his mother. Her reaction? "It better come out looking like him." FML

#20844930
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36113) - you deserved it (3448)

On 08/19/2013 at 3:55pm - misc - by AtomicDiamond87 (woman) - United States (Washington)

AtomicDiamond87's comment about their FML

OP here. Well She didn't say it as a joke. She's always been a let down. But thank you all for the good comments. No I don't cheat. I love my boyfriend. Been together almost two years. Didn't plan for a baby because the doctors told him he wasn't able. He's so happy. And i'm always tired. Ad for the woman who also have mother in law problems keep your heads up :)

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