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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

SirDirtyRedD's comment about their FML

i would just like to make a point that he is only six he has plenty of time to make better plans lol

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Today, I went to my first ever job interview. I thought I was doing well, until the recruiter asked why he should hire me. The only thing I could say was "Because I'm really, really nervous right now?" FML

#21037366
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34637) - you deserved it (6233)

On 01/23/2014 at 5:16pm - work - by bebooneo (woman) - United States (Texas)

bebooneo's comment about their FML

Let me elaborate. It was yesterday when this happened and I submitted the FML, just to cheer myself up. I am a recent graduate and it was at a job fair, not a scheduled interview but to my surprise one of the recruiters started interviewing me right away. I was unprepared and got flustered and started saying that. But the good news is that they indeed seemed to like me enough to email me for a real interview next week! All prayers appreciated! Thank you all for your wonderful comments.

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Today, I had a big final project due for class. None of my project partners would help me yesterday, because they were convinced we'd have a snow day. Unfortunately, we didn't have a snow day, and we failed. FML

#21035327
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40360) - you deserved it (7042)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:24pm - misc - by sidldaking - United States (New Jersey)

sidldaking's comment about their FML

To follow up on the FML, I complained to my teacher and informed him about the situation. The project had multiple parts and we were given some time to work on it in class. I managed to finish my part of the project a few days earlier and all I had to do, was wait for my partners to finish their parts and I can put the whole thing together and hand it in. I kept goading my partners to finish their parts but to no avail. Finally on the night before the deadline, I begged my partners to finish, but they refused due to the possible snow day the next day. My teacher understood the situation and he decided to accept my part and grade it for me while the rest of my partners failed.
P.S. Sorry for being so late

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Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

#21033644
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40361) - you deserved it (7504)

On 01/20/2014 at 5:12am - misc - by Kaddiscott (woman) - Italy (Trentino-Alto Adige)

Kaddiscott's comment about their FML

Hi guys, OP here. I speak fluent french, I just had a little blunder. This was actually like a few months ago when I was on France on holiday, and yeah the seller gave me a funny look and we had a giggle, but then I said, ooops and that I meant to say potato. It was soooo embarrassing, my parents never let me live it down FML hahahah

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Today, I noticed that the condom in my wallet has been there so long it's left a mark. FML

#21033634
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47256) - you deserved it (12173)

On 01/20/2014 at 4:31am - intimacy - by arsenalfcboy (man) - United Kingdom (York)

arsenalfcboy's comment about their FML

I'm a uni student so believe me, I go out plenty. Still no luck.

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Today, after arriving home from work I found that my dog took a dump down the air conditioning vents on the floor. Now the whole house smells so good. FML

#21031439
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44550) - you deserved it (4801)

On 01/18/2014 at 2:14am - animals - by seth7_ - United States (Florida)

seth7_'s comment about their FML

In the process of training, he's a puppy though. My wife was supposed to be watching him but something came up.

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Today, my family and I were having turkey for dinner. My boyfriend leaned in towards me and muttered, "I'll stuff your turkey later". Everyone heard and the whole room went dead silent. FML

#21031092
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55316) - you deserved it (7861)

On 01/17/2014 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by gimmeafknbreak (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

gimmeafknbreak's comment about their FML

It was actually quite humorous. Even my father laughed...though some others didn't find my boyfriend's statement quite so funny. And for those that were asking, yes...he pulled through. in fact about twenty minutes after the "incident". haha. Those family dinners get SO boring.

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Today, I hacked into my best friend's Facebook account to message my mother about organizing a surprise party for myself for my 21st. She ignored the message for two days before replying, "I don't think so. No one would really show up and I think that would hurt her feelings." FML

#21029577
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43847) - you deserved it (18451)

On 01/16/2014 at 6:45am - misc - by nolovefor21 (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

nolovefor21's comment about their FML

OP here,

I didnt "hack" into her account really, I asked her if I could use her account to try and plan myself a surprise party.. Mainly because Ive always wanted one but never had anyone step up to do it. She gave me her password so I could do it.

But apparently that was a waste of time according to my mother...

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Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My boyfriend thinks I'm faking the whole thing in revenge for the fight we had yesterday. FML

#21028912
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47521) - you deserved it (7557)

On 01/15/2014 at 4:47pm - love - by JaneChemi (woman) - United States (California)

JaneChemi's comment about their FML

hi guys. when I found out I ran out of the bathroom holding a pregnancy test screaming "holy fucking shit babe I'm pregnant". I'm not sure I can really do much else to convince him. wait.... how did I deserve this??

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Today, before a blind date with a girl set up by my flatmate, I put some aftershave on. Then I realised I had forgotten my contact lenses. When I put them in it caused so much pain that in my attempt to reach the bathroom I walked into a wall. When I got there, she saw my swollen face and left. FML

#21026476
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41656) - you deserved it (7630)

On 01/13/2014 at 10:37am - love - by danny395 (man) - United Kingdom

danny395's comment about their FML

OP here this is the first time I've had a post accepted so i thought i should elaborate because I hate it when people don't explain.

The reason I wasn't wearing glasses is I've been assured by many people that I look pretty stupid in my glasses and I thought it would be best to make a good first impression (I know its vain but I wanted to impress).

I also only put one contact lens in so my left eye was fine but my sight is so bad (-6.25 if your'e interested) that i cant see anything at all without my glasses + Im fairly tall and live on the top floor with some crazily steep stairs so its pretty hard to get down in the best of times but a mix of the pain plus bad sight meant i slipped and sent myself into the wall.

I realise I should have washed my hands first but i was in a rush and i didn't want to be late, kind of ironic considering I ended up being about an hour late trying to sort out this particular mess. Worse of all I ended up wearing my glasses anyway...

In defence I've been assured by my flatmate that the girl is really nice but not very outgoing and quite shy, she didn't really want to be there and I was so late I can understand she left when I arrived looking like I'd been in a couple of MMA fights...

And #3 I appreciate you seeing the irony in 'blind' date :)

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Today, I found out that whenever my ex-wife is late getting the kids to school, she tells them to tell their teachers they were with me, and forges my name on the sign-in sheet. Missing homework? Dad's house. Forgot to bring something important? Ditto. The school thinks I'm a horrible parent. FML

#21026399
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58279) - you deserved it (4745)

On 01/13/2014 at 7:09am - intimacy - by OvertonHippie - United States (Mississippi)

OvertonHippie's comment about their FML

What she doesn't realize is that in a school with only 180 students, it's impossible to get away with stuff like that. The principal knows what's up, because we dealt with similar issues last year; I just didn't think I was going to have to schedule meetings with the teachers again about it (outside of the regular parent-teacher conferences, which she attends). I *had* kind of noticed the teachers giving me the stink-eye in the car line lately though.

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Today, I joked with a pregnant girl in a state juvenile correctional facility where I work that eating a lot of candy would damage the unborn baby's teeth. Without batting an eye, she responded that she would simply "eat some toothpaste after the candy." FML

#21023301
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40842) - you deserved it (7149)

On 01/10/2014 at 3:20am - kids - by polluxdc (woman) - United States (Oregon)

polluxdc's comment about their FML

OP here. Yeah, I was joking, they aren't always the most sophisticated of jokes, but it gives one a sense of where the kid may or may not be coming from. The kid, unfortunately, was not joking, and I had to explain a few things to her. Thanx for the comments. For those of you who said stop joking around and do your job...it'd be a mighty dreary place if there was no humor (lame as it may or may not be). It IS a portion of our job. This post was mostly meant as a, "f" all our lives if this is what the future holds.

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