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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, I took my two and a half year-old son Trick or Treating for the first time in our new neighborhood. At the very first house, a girl told us we were too early and slammed the door in our face. My son cried. FML

#20941092
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44823) - you deserved it (3956)

On 11/01/2013 at 4:56am - kids - by Gtca - United States (Texas)

Gtca's comment about their FML

OP here! A lot of these comments are hilarious! Thanks for that and for those that showed us some support and sympathy. We started trick or treating at 5:15. Apparently trick or treating kicks up in our neighborhood around 6/6:30. Now I know. When I went trick or treating when I was younger, everyone started around 4 and people were prepared. Besides, how hard is it put some candy in a bowl? Also, some people commented about why a 2.5 year old needs candy, he doesn't, but we went for the experience. Luckily, we rebounded and had a fun Halloween after that incident.

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Today, my grandma has been running around the neighborhood, dressed as Bobo the Evil Clown, chasing trick-or-treaters. All I've been able to do is chase after her, and apologize to the terrified children's families. FML

#20941017
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37114) - you deserved it (3281)

On 11/01/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by bobosgonnagetyou - United States (Oregon)

bobosgonnagetyou's comment about their FML

Hey FML, OP here! I created an account so I could answer some of your questions. First off, I live in Oregon. Secondly, I thought it was hilarious, although a tad creepy at times, but I just let her do her thing and didn't try to stop her. Most people thought it was great and took it really well. She had a blast doing it, and was simply pulling a prank, which is what Halloween is all about! :)

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Today, I broke my tooth nearly in half. On a completely unrelated note, the Jew's Harp is my new least-favorite instrument. FML

#20940711
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28200) - you deserved it (4279)

On 10/31/2013 at 9:16pm - health - by Blaphlafagus - United States (Texas)

Blaphlafagus's comment about their FML

Kinda awkward that I play the saxophone as my main instrument... Ok story time, so I was sitting there in my Music Theory class just messing around because it was near the end of the period and one of my friends brought this instrument thing called a Jew's Harp or Jaw Harp. They said it plays by vibrating your teeth or something so, not thinking clearly, put it directly against my teeth and pulled the thing back really far and let it loose. I have no clue what I was thinking at the time. Luckily I'll go to the dentist on Monday and get it all nice and pretty again.

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Today, I could think of more 'pros' than 'cons' for why I should start drinking again. FML

#20938877
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34488) - you deserved it (6435)

On 10/30/2013 at 6:41am - misc - by neonstarr - New Zealand

neonstarr's comment about their FML

Op here. Surprised this got posted.

Sorry to burst some the bubbles but I'm not an alcoholic, I stopped drinking because of medical reasons, turns out I have gluten intolerance which caused damage to my gut, and by association killed my stomach lining and throat. Wasn't pleasant.
Also I'm a chick.

And since I'm better, I was weighing out pros and cons at 330am.

If I ever do have a drinking problem
Ill use some of the advice :)

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Today, I found out my 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant. FML

#20938765
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45012) - you deserved it (7054)

On 10/30/2013 at 1:48am - kids - by catfan (woman) - United States (California)

catfan's comment about their FML

Hi this is OP. First off, my daughter is not pregnant. She has been going to school sex ed classes since she was 11, apparently they don't explain how someone gets pregnant in enough detail. She told me she's a virgin, though she thought she wasn't because she was "having sex" with the showerhead. Apparently one of her friends had told her masturbation counts as sex.

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Today, I had a job interview that I was quite nervous about. During the interview, I struggled to get my words out and the interviewer angrily told me to, "Get on with it." I continued to struggle and was later kicked out for wasting their time. I have a stutter. FML

#20937756
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45479) - you deserved it (3648)

On 10/29/2013 at 9:23am - work - by abcdefghijkl1233 (man) - United Kingdom (Oldham)

abcdefghijkl1233's comment about their FML

Thank you for those of you who left kind comments, those of you who left comments of the other kind probably don't understand. I didn't fully expect my stutter to get in the way of the interview so much, but combined with my nervousness it gradually got worse throughout. After the way I was treated I realised it wasn't a place I would want to be at so I left without a fight.

Also I'd like to thank you for the help methods some of you said, I've been trying to improve it and I'm definitely going to try them, thanks again :)

In the future I will inform them beforehand!

#8 Aha, good ol' game of Pictionary, never fails to start arguments!

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Today, l grounded my 17-year-old son from his computer because of his terrible attitude towards his homework. As payback, he convinced my 5-year-old daughter that if she goes to sleep, she'll never wake up. I now have a hysterical and sleepless child to deal with. FML

#20936409
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42313) - you deserved it (7875)

On 10/28/2013 at 1:35am - kids - by PIGaming (man) - Australia (Victoria)

PIGaming's comment about their FML

Hey all, im OP (although as my first time ever commenting, I hope this actually works!)

Of course, in the end, my daughter fell asleep. although it was around 1am, a time I thought no five year old was physically capable of acheiving. You might say it was almost worse the next day, as she was very grumpy and tired!

I forbid my son from attending a party (supposedly the 'party of the year'), and have spoken to his school who are arranging a meeting with him to discuss ways of bettering his homework skills and general motivation.

Of course he probably despises of me, but I dont want him to look back on school like I have and regret he didn't work hard enough, let alone AT ALL.

Thanks for all the comments, and hopefully I can interact more on this site with the community.

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Today, the tickets I bought for my favorite band's concert arrived in the mail. The concert was last night. FML

#20935170
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45811) - you deserved it (4136)

On 10/27/2013 at 12:11am - misc - by MsConfusedd (woman) - United States

MsConfusedd's comment about their FML

Although these posts certainly aMuse me, there's No Doubt I'm still pissed. The Postal Service in These United States is so bad even Twenty One Pilots couldn't get the tickets to my Neighbourhood on time. The Maine point is that my Simple Plan to see my favorite band was ruined by the Hooligans working as mail men. That's Sum 41 dollars wasted. I Solemnly Swear that this was my All Time Low and next time there's a concert I'll print tickets to make sure I can have Fun.. My tickets will be printed by the time I blink-182 times. Even though it Hurts that I missed my concert, thank you guys for making me LMFAO, this is the best comment thread ever!

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Today, I found out that my husband told his mom that she can move in with us once his time in the army is over. We are moving into my house, and he didn't think it was important to run it by me first. FML

#20934814
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36629) - you deserved it (2878)

On 10/26/2013 at 6:42pm - misc - by imchacon22 - United States (Kansas)

imchacon22's comment about their FML

Just to clear things up it is technically my house. My parents are rather well off and gave me a house and it's under my name. This was before we got married. Things he bought before we got married are technically his and things we have gotten since we have been married are ours. And for the person who said he defended our country so he should be allowed to do that, no honey just because he served our country doesn't make him entitled to make decisions like this without me. His mom has only met me once when she came to stay with us and in that short week she managed to insult me each and every single day and to act like she was running things. She isn't in need either it's just that his sister and brother don't want her living with them either because of the way she acts and demands things so I guess he's doing it to get her off their backs. But anyways maybe he'll change his mind or she will get a job and a place of her own.

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Today, I got into a fight with my mother. Her idea of a birthday present to me is buying me a husband. Yes, buying. She told an asshat she found online about my trust fund, and now they're both trying to put together "the wedding of the millennium". She still doesn't understand why I'm mad. FML

#20933913
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43715) - you deserved it (2580)

On 10/25/2013 at 9:25pm - misc - by mn_shr - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

mn_shr's comment about their FML

Hello everyone, OP here. I feel like I need to clear something up, and that's living in the Middle East does not mean I am from the Middle East. I repeat, not from Qatar.

Also, Muslim or otherwise, Arab girls have the complete freedom to refuse marriage as they see fit. Not that there aren't exceptions to that, but for the most part girls are far more autonomous nowadays. To whoever looked up stuff on the internet, I'd like to say for a fact that it is 100% untrue.

To clear up my situation, I'd like to point out I'm a very ritualistic person and my birthday means a lot to me. Seeing as my mother and I have never gotten along, and frankly don't like each other very much, her way to sabotage my birthday was to bribe this Sir Asshole McLoser to marry me. I've made my disinterest very clear so for those rooting that I give it a shot, please don't. I'm turning 23 and I think I'm going to wait a few years before considering resorting to arranged courtships and the like. Thanks for whoever wished me a happy birthday!



P.S. Mr. Bastard, I've always had a thing for your sense of humor, I'm sure we could make something work.

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Today, someone tried to steal my backpack from the hook on the bathroom stall. Good news: they were caught off-guard by how heavy it was and dropped it. Bad news: my foot is now broken from using it to cushion the backpack's fall. FML

#20931008
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41508) - you deserved it (4167)

On 10/23/2013 at 12:32pm - health - by way2go - United States (Texas)

way2go's comment about their FML

Op here... The only reason I saved the bag was for my laptop inside... If it were just my textbooks I wouldn't be in a boot right now. I would have let it fall.

Some of these comments made me laugh though, at least something good could come out of this!

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Today, I decided to try LSD with a few friends in a safe environment. As an artist, I had planned to spend my trip doing psychedelic paintings and had all my supplies set up. Apparently I spent most of my time in fetal position muttering about the "evil easel" and never even touched my canvas. FML

#20930479
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21010) - you deserved it (51640)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:11pm - work - by oldshitnewshit - United States

oldshitnewshit's comment about their FML

Looking at the comments I see we've got some seriously mixed opinions about me. So, first off: Hi, I'm Juniper, I'm 23 and I'm in art school in the US. I have never tried LSD or any other kind of "hardcore" drug before this. My friend had some tabs that he had used before and asked me if I wanted to try it. I agreed, only after doing extensive research, and determining that the risk was one I was willing to take. During that research, I stumbled across some beautiful works of people who had done art under the influence and thought perhaps I could have some fun trying that as well. I'm an art student and always open to new things. My parents were also hardcore hippies back in the day, and they've told me about their psychedelic experiences. I knew my risks. I have no plans to take LSD again, although I'm not currently suffering any adverse effects aside from water tasting kinda metallic for the next 24 hours (this took place about a week ago.) And the FML is actually not entirely true, but exaggerated for comedic effect. The paranoia and muttering did not last the entire time, only about 15-30 minutes. My entire trip lasted about 9-10 hours. One of my friends decided to remove the easel when she saw that it was making me upset. I think its large, angled presence in the room was off-putting. I actually spent the majority of my time having a good trip, my friends took great care of me. And despite not touching my canvas, I made some radical drawings. I did my research, I knew my risks, I set myself up responsibly. I'm not looking for sympathy or support– I just thought I'd share my kinda funny story. Those of you who are calling me an idiot are entitled to your opinions, but you're not insulting a wall. I'm a human being that makes choices for myself. Those of you who abstain from drugs, you should be proud! That's wonderful and healthy, but please allow and do not judge me for my own choices. My experimental phase is not harmful or offensive to you. And to my fellow art junkies: I wasn't expecting to create a masterpiece, this was for fun. I'm a learning artist!

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Today, my dog got out of the house. I was running after him and remembered the old "pretend you're hurt" trick. I got on the ground, and cried out as if I was hurt. My dog just kept running. FML

#20930350
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36570) - you deserved it (7025)

On 10/22/2013 at 3:20pm - animals - by WalnutGaming - United States (Maryland)

WalnutGaming's comment about their FML

Hey guys. I did end up finding my dog. For those who said get a treat or meat, my dog would be way down the street by that time. My dog had stopped to "say Hi" to my neighbor and her dog. I used this method because my dog was trained to come to me when I lay down, but something made him run instead.
In training meat was put on the ground and I was put on the ground and my dog chose me first over the meat. He is a good dog really, this is his first actual stunt hes pulled. Anyway, just thought it'd be nice to fill you guys in.

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