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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, it's my mom's birthday. Got the perfect gift, the perfect card and of course the perfect cake. Well, it was the perfect cake until my dog's ass crushed it. FML

#21276833
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31844) - you deserved it (3771)

On 10/13/2014 at 10:15am - animals - by Justified12 - United States (Massachusetts)

Justified12's comment about their FML

Hello OP here,
So, basically this is what happened:
As my dad is a pastor, we attend church as a family. I special ordered the cake and decided to pick it up, Sunday morning before going to church. The plan was to drop the cake off at my sisters house along with our two german shepherds since dogs aren't allowed in my church and I didn't want to leave them in my truck for health and safety reasons. So I picked up the cake, put both of the dogs in the back and placed the cake on the passenger seat. Halfway to my sister's house, it starts to get hot in the truck, so I rolled down the passenger window and of course what does every dog in the planet want to do if there's an open window? Stick his head out of the window. Afraid that he would jump out, I commanded him to "stop and sit and needless to say, as thankful I am that the cake was in a box, there was an obvious inevitable depression in it. Mom was too busy to notice since I bought her a kayak and a beautiful card. But lesson well learned. Thank you for the birthday wishes, and take care!

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Today, while waiting for a plane, a man in a wheelchair was struggling to get to baggage, so I helped him. I did so without realising that I passed through the "No Entry" gate. What did I forget? My phone, my ID, and my boarding pass. What do you need to get back to the plane? All of those. FML

#21276093
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32241) - you deserved it (5268)

On 10/12/2014 at 8:52am - misc - by epiclollipop (man) - United States (North Carolina)

epiclollipop's comment about their FML

Just an extra bit of info: I was with my parents at the airport, so I did make it back... after 45 minutes of going through security and announcing that I was an idiot on the intercom so my dad could save me.

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Today, I got married. It was a beautiful ceremony with all of our family and friends. Too bad it ended with us leaving the reception before dancing even started, since my groom couldn't stop bawling his eyes out from all the stress. FML

#21276028
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33303) - you deserved it (3819)

On 10/12/2014 at 3:46am - love - by mdwillow (woman) - United States (Alaska)

mdwillow's comment about their FML

OP here! Just to clarify, I was very understanding of his stress. We both actually suffer from anxiety so it was a hard day in general. This was going to be his first night moved out from his parents though and change is always hard. Once we woke up the next morning I showed him we got published and we were both excited! haha no hard feelings on either side:)

The honeymoon has been great. It's so nice to get away from everyone:) Thank you for all the kind wishes! We are both so excited to be married to each other as best friends.

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Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

#21275225
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35960) - you deserved it (4865)

On 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by bluevix (woman) - United States (Virginia)

bluevix's comment about their FML

Thank you, we're working on it together. It isn't an easy process as it is difficult not to take his disinterest personal, and I have taken it personal (especially early on)... but when you are compatible with your spouse in as many ways as we are. Whilst I may enjoy the idea of sexual intimacy more than him, at least I have someone who loves me as much as I do them. We have plenty of activities we enjoy, but he is more of the asexual type that enjoys a good cuddle versus sex. Which I have learned to enjoy more as we continue on in our marriage.

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Today, I woke up to find that my acne has lined itself beautifully in a perfect 'L' shape in the centre of my forehead. FML

#21275221
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36522) - you deserved it (2925)

On 10/10/2014 at 9:17pm - health - by SeriousJoker72 - Canada (Manitoba)

SeriousJoker72's comment about their FML

Hahahahaha! Maybe I'll make that my Halloween costume!

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Today, my son was crying because he's afraid he might get Ebola. We live in Maine, and he's 16. FML

#21275168
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32211) - you deserved it (4254)

On 10/10/2014 at 7:27pm - kids - by MainePains (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

MainePains's comment about their FML

Hello, OP here! Apparently, the reason he has been crying is because the high school he goes to a lot of rumors are flying around- about Ebola coming to Maine. Thanks for the advice, but I have to say- a few of you are Maineiacs.

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Today, I tried a soup sample at a supermarket. An employee then came over and started asking me questions about how I got the cup for the sample, telling me it wasn't store policy to just give out sample cups. I was so stressed that I broke down crying in the middle of the supermarket. FML

#21274755
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31993) - you deserved it (4369)

On 10/10/2014 at 2:57am - misc - by gracewinchester (woman) - United States (Oregon)

gracewinchester's comment about their FML

Just to clarify: I wasn't just crying because of the soup. My college apps are due Monday, I was going to have to be at school from 7:30AM - 8:00 the next morning, I have a huge part in a play and expectations are very high, SATs are Saturday, LOTS more. The store's official policy is to have an employee come with the customer and get a soup sample. The soup sample cups look exactly like the salad dressing cups so she probably thought I was trying soup without asking or an employee made a mistake, which is actually what happened. I normally don't ever cry in front of people but for some reason that just set me off. Hope that clears anything up :)

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Today, I found out that I am "un-promotable" to the job that I have been promised for the last two years because, I "don't suffer idiots well." Idiots. FML

#21274643
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26610) - you deserved it (3084)

On 10/09/2014 at 11:32pm - work - by freeachickadee - United States (New Jersey)

freeachickadee's comment about their FML

OP Here. I don't suffer idiots well means that I don't tolerate or deal with idiots well. Which is utter crap. It is an excuse to get out of giving me the promotion they've been promising me for years. Now they have an alternate (totally unqualified candidate) so they are passing me over. FML. Onto bigger and better things I guess.

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Today, I was walking down the street holding my boyfriend's hand, when a seemingly sweet old man said to him, "Hey, you've got to hold her hand properly". I asked him to show me what properly meant. He licked my hand. FML

#21274384
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28114) - you deserved it (5016)

On 10/09/2014 at 5:42pm - misc - by peak4u - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

peak4u's comment about their FML

Hi everyone, some of your comments truly made me laugh. But more importantly I'm concerned for those of you who cannot understand why I'd talk to a seemingly friendly old man when I'm in the company of my boyfriend, it's just common decency my dears. My boyfriend and I have a really strong relationship and we love to annoy each other for fun, he took it jokingly but pretended to be mad at me for a minute but then proceeded to hand me some hand sanitiser ... No harm done.

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Today, my boyfriend admitted than he's been using Febreze instead of showering for the past month. FML

#21274219
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35553) - you deserved it (4036)

On 10/09/2014 at 12:48pm - love - by idonthaveauserna - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

idonthaveauserna's comment about their FML

OP here- It's a long distance relationship, he told me over Skype.

I can confirm that he HAS had a (long) shower now.

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Today, a day after being informed that keeping my wallet in my front pocket was "strange", my wallet was stolen from my back pocket. FML

#21273066
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28399) - you deserved it (4665)

On 10/07/2014 at 8:46pm - money - by NotDarkKnight (man) - United States (Georgia)

NotDarkKnight's comment about their FML

OP here. The person that told me that is was 'strange' is a friend of mine, so I dont think it was him. I didnt switch pockets because of his comment, but I just wanted to change it up a bit. Another friend found my wallet and returned it. I'm 15, so I don't have any money anyways...

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Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

#21272117
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31140) - you deserved it (8884)

On 10/06/2014 at 4:24pm - kids - by SaintGoobers (woman) - United States (New York)

SaintGoobers's comment about their FML

Hey Buddy, this is the first time Ady has ever cussed, or at least with me viewing it. She claims that her Father was singing the songs so she thought she would sing with him. I will be talking to her dad! Lol.

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