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metalcruton

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814

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high river, canada
31
Wednesday 13 July 1994

Metalcruton

i am canadian and proud of it. i hate cold wheather and have douche bag friends-_- and FML ROCKS

Metalcruton -

KathrinLor...

Metalcruton -

Metalcruton

lovers5201

tnice

KathrinLor...

vanessa01

Avrenim

monapm

greenwichg...

Smart_but_...

jsni2132

Kvothee

Marine6297

bugsGoRawr

Avrenim

Metalcruton

Metalcruton

Caught off guard

dooommage - - France

Today, I was teasing my cat with a piece of string when suddenly my phone rang. I answered it with one hand and put the string down with the other onto my lap. The beast seized the opportunity to spring, claws out, onto my privates. FML

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Stranger danger

shit - - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud, or that I wasn't alone. FML

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parentfail - 11/12/2010 14:44 - United Kingdom

Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML

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katybaby - 09/12/2010 17:15 - United States

Today, my husband ran at me, groaning like a zombie. I was so startled that I screamed, punched him, and started sobbing. Now he won't talk to me because this is 'the first step on the road of domestic violence'. FML

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Suave

ooblie - 08/12/2010 08:22 - United States

Today, after receiving a lovely massage from my boyfriend, I was lying topless in bed beside him. Just as I was thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for some intimacy, he looks at me and says, "My mom is SO awesome." FML

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