The Top

You're right, it was awkward with his head turned toward me the whole time. Working in the main office doesn't leave me a lot of room as to what I can say or do in front of the people I escort across the building (most of them sponsors from colleges or other organizations to pass out information during lunch). I think the worst I had to endure was this one pair of guys who did nothing but bad-mouth the school and the others that worked in my office. My only response was to take them down the longest, winding path to their destination as I could imagine. Other than that, I had to remain silent when I wanted to defend my school's honor. As far as this kid, I ended up clamming up and stopped making any attempt to talk to him. I usually call people out on weird behavior, but I think that it was just the shock and disgust of it all that glued my mouth shut. I just walked back to the office silently and did nothing. What was I supposed to do, cry 'sexual harassment' this late in the school year? I've got 4 days left before I never have to attend high school again. I'd rather it go off without a hitch. As for the 'I've got a nice rack' comments, I don't think it's appropriate to stare either way. Some things are meant to keep to yourself (or your own eyeballs).

By reyoflight - 19/04/2013 22:04 - Brazil - Rio De Janeiro

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 488

You deserved it 7 433

By wahwah - 23/10/2009 06:51 - United States

Today, I had to complete a project for my course in Italian. We had to write a little paragraph about a friend. I had to make one up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 220

You deserved it 6 279

Overreaction Man

By Anonymous - 07/04/2021 23:00

Today, I told my boyfriend I’m pregnant. He told me not to worry, he’d pay child support until it’s 18, and he’d be moved out of our flat by Friday. When I asked him why, he told me not to be stupid, no way was he being trapped into raising a kid. He didn’t even ask if it was a boy or girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 704

You deserved it 737

By Gustav Fjorder - 04/07/2011 07:27 - Switzerland

Today, for breakfast, there were scrambled eggs, boiled eggs, bacon, sausages, fresh bread, croissants, brownies, donuts, fruit smoothie, coffee, tea and orange juice. Too bad no one bothered wake me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 911

You deserved it 10 353

By scarred - 22/10/2009 12:30 - France

Today, I found out my mom is the nude model for an art class at my college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 143

You deserved it 3 263

TMI

By wow - 28/05/2014 23:08 - United States - Cape Coral

Today, my mother told me that I was "made" in the bathroom of the store I work at now. She even pointed out which stall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 054

You deserved it 5 451

Cheap ass

By Anonymous - 15/08/2019 14:00

Today, I was scrolling through Instagram when I got a new follow suggestion. I checked her feed, and found out it was my ex-fiancé’s newest fiancée. And he'd proposed to her using an $185 ring I'd bought myself for my birthday last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 912

You deserved it 180

A huge mess of stuff

By GreatWeek - 31/05/2022 00:01 - United States - Dighton

Today, I had to help one of my best friends while he was having a seizure. Earlier this morning my longtime girlfriend broke up with me. Oh, and also earlier this week I found out my other best friend has cancer. Lord take me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 040

You deserved it 124

Sexy

By Anonymous - 23/05/2014 02:36 - United States - Rockland

Today, I accidentally ripped out my boyfriend's insulin pump while trying to give him a lapdance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 693

You deserved it 17 209

Scumbag

By old mom - 29/09/2023 06:00

Today, my scumbag son slapped his girlfriend in front of her family, and her dad picked him up and threw him off a second floor balcony. Good for her dad, he deserved it, but now he's laid up at my place and I have to wipe his ass and listen to him whine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 016

You deserved it 414

By Courtney - 28/06/2011 02:10 - United States

Today, I couldn't figure out what was worse: accidentally dropping my car keys into the bottom of a filthy park lake, or getting a fishhook through my toenail in an attempt to retrieve them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 926

You deserved it 5 134

By 2ndgenoration - 17/05/2014 21:56 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, my grandmother told me that since my dad was a mistake, I too am a mistake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 680

You deserved it 4 214

Felt cute

By dieana - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Canada - Lacombe

Today, I actually uttered the words, "Those are my good sweatpants." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 341

You deserved it 9 715

By AAMBC4 - 09/04/2013 10:30 - United States - Jersey City

Today, my doctor asked me how often I drink, and I responded, "Socially." My three-year-old piped up, "No Mom, you drink all the time." My doctor now thinks I'm a raging alcoholic. My kid has never seen me drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 068

You deserved it 3 880

AAMBC4 tells us more.

AAMBC4 0

Wednesday 10 April 2013 3:40

OP here. Some of these comments crack me up, but thank you for the chuckle. My daughter is the light of my life and truly has a sense of humor and intelligence beyond her short 3 years. I appreciate the support of most and I am happy to have this to share with her as she gets older.

By Anonymous - 25/06/2011 20:39 - Switzerland

Today, my family went out to dinner at a seafood restaurant. While we were eating our food, my grandma demanded to see the manager, and loudly complained that her fish was "too fishy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 103

You deserved it 4 243