Work, Wanker Intimacy Where on Earth do you work?

Where on Earth do you work?

Anonymous - 26/08/2012 23:39 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

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DearLord - 03/04/2020 23:00 - Canada

Today, I had to explain to my boss that masturbating in public is inappropriate. This isn't the first time this has taken place. FML

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smh - 10/09/2015 06:09 - Canada

Today, after coming home from a long day at work, I found out that in a house full of five adults, some rules still need to be set. The newest addition to the rules? No watching porn and jerking off in the living room. FML

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Leave me alone

Peppermint - 17/03/2011 10:00 - New Zealand

Today, I put signs up in the lifts at work with my name and desk phone number as the contact in case the lifts break down. I work in IT so there are hundreds of men in the building. Someone has already drawn a very wonky heart next to my name. FML

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bipbip - 12/11/2008 07:53 - France

Today, at work, I received an email telling me that viewing porn websites was prohibited and was a good enough reason to fire me. FML

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You wanker

dinosaucer - 12/10/2011 00:19 - United States

Today, I was accused of masturbating during work. I was actually just getting something out of my pocket. FML

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"I'm horny, horny horny horny"

Anonymous - 29/09/2020 23:01

Today, I got incredibly horny at work. No one was in the office, so I spread out on my yoga mat and started to masturbate. All of the sudden, I heard a forklift outside. I quickly tried to hide, but I think the construction worker caught me. He’ll be working here all month. FML

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OhGodWhy - 29/12/2016 23:30 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, I caught my coworker masturbating in the bathroom. This was during her shift, while I was mopping the bathroom floors. FML

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What the hell is this workplace?

Anonymous - 04/05/2022 22:00

Today, it’s been so long since I got laid, I decided to rub one out in the office bathroom. I did it twice (morning/afternoon), and both times, there were two different guys clearly doing the same thing. The downstairs office bathroom is apparently a pit of desperation. FML

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Anonymous - 21/08/2012 17:39 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss stroking and playing with himself. I have my annual performance assessment with him in an hour. FML

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tadam - 10/11/2008 09:11 - France

Today, to my delight I discover that there is security camera in the storage room at my work. The same room where, two days ago I masturbated. FML

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jdall2me 3

Monday 27 August 2012 9:20

Hard times man

alicette_fml 12

Monday 27 August 2012 9:21

I feel bad for the guy that got caught doing it xD

profligatesoul 18

Friday 1 March 2013 3:07

I'm gonna ask my boss if we can get one of those signs put up at work.

ImAndrew59 8

Monday 14 October 2013 2:48

Well i'm 6th grade and my friend got caught jerking off in science.

fantasyworld 37

Sunday 31 August 2014 12:33

Where do you work that would make someone feel the need to whack off at their desk?

PiNYANo 11

Tuesday 17 February 2015 6:04

This is making me confused because it said, " I USUALLY don't whack off at my desk". He didn't say he doesn't, he said usually. It's pretty confusing to me