Health, Clumsy and Injury: Self report

Self report

By Bonk - 04/02/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, my clumsiness reached a whole level when I hit myself in the face with a hammer hard enough for blood to come out. FML

agreeclassic 388

vote type 1 199

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What? How? Why?

By Anonymous - 17/03/2021 22:01 - United States - Boise

Today, I smashed my finger with a hammer. A finger on the hand holding the hammer. FML

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Always wear protective gear

By Anonymous - 06/06/2020 14:02

Today, while nailing a board down, I hit my thumb with the hammer. As I reached to console my throbbing finger, I dropped the hammer on my foot. When I went down to hold my foot, I smacked my head on the board. Now I've got a concussion, a smashed finger, and a bruised foot. FML

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Night fight

By FistFighter - 09/04/2011 04:01 - United States

Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML

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Accidents will happen

By Anonymous - 27/04/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML

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My body hates me

By Owie - 12/09/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, I was looking at myself in the mirror and tried to touch my face. Unfortunately I have Tourette's, so my hand just uncontrollably slammed into my cheek, consequently jamming one of my fingernails into it. It started bleeding like crazy. My fingernails aren't exactly long, either… that's how hard it hit. FML

agreeclassic 344

vote type 1 74

By nukebroadcast - 16/12/2010 06:32 - United States

Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML

agreeclassic 30 326

vote type 1 6 018

I don't know my strength

By Anonymous - 09/01/2022 06:01 - Australia - Perth

Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML

agreeclassic 955

vote type 1 317

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 16:45 - United States

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

agreeclassic 16 009

vote type 1 32 378

By Amy - 10/05/2012 19:14 - Canada - Prince George

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

agreeclassic 25 055

vote type 1 5 245

Everyone does

By Anonymous - 31/07/2022 02:00

Today, I thought a spider had fallen on me, so I wounded up accidentally punching myself. Twice. I hate nose bleeds. FML

agreeclassic 339

vote type 1 697

Hangryko 31

Sunday 4 February 2024 19:45

Please go to the hospital. Get checked for concussion and other injuries.

Damama 10

Monday 5 February 2024 13:50

Been there, done that..unfortunately.

Comments

The_Real_Cvh 10

Sunday 4 February 2024 17:02

Blood came out the hammer?

Hangryko 31

Sunday 4 February 2024 19:45

Please go to the hospital. Get checked for concussion and other injuries.

Damama 10

Monday 5 February 2024 13:50

Been there, done that..unfortunately.

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Today, I spent nearly half an hour looking for my favourite pair of shoes. I ended up getting so pissed off that I accused my boyfriend of stealing them. He then pointed out that I was wearing them. FML

agreeclassic 13 831

vote type 1 34 300

Today, I just had knee surgery which has put me on crutches for 6 weeks. I fell on my ass after washing my hands after using the bathroom. Ashamed, my boyfriend and father had to pick me up. I destroyed the towel rack, ripping it of the wall. All this pain is now potentially for nothing. It's day 4 post operation. FML

agreeclassic 827

vote type 1 137

Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML

agreeclassic 4 220

vote type 1 2 499

Today, I learned that if you stare down an attractive man while pumping gas, he'll stare back. Then he might ask for your number. At which point his girlfriend will get out of the car and threaten to kick your ass. FML

agreeclassic 31 570

vote type 1 12 616

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

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Today, I got into an Uber, said, “Hey! How’ve you been?” to the driver, thinking he was a friend of mine. The guy suspiciously replied, “Uh, I think we’ve never met,” and we both sat in uncomfortable silence for the rest of the ride. FML

agreeclassic 252

vote type 1 210

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