Sex Love Missed you too

Missed you too

ooook - 16/02/2009 17:08 - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend came over. After I'd finished pouring my heart out to him about how much I missed him, and how much I loved him, he looked at me and asked, "So are we gonna do it, or what?" FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

wtfjusthappened - 24/01/2009 03:27 - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend from two years ago called and asked to come over. Still being in love with him, I agreed to see him but decided I wasn't drunk enough to handle the stress. After a while of drinking, he said that he really missed me and wanted to be with me. My reply consisted of throwing up. FML

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Second chancer

donotbelieveinsecondchances - 02/03/2015 14:04 - Netherlands - Capelle Aan Den Ijssel

Today, my ex gave me a heartwarming speech about how much he wanted me back. After talking for hours and me finally wanting to get back together too, he started mentioning a date he has with a cute colleague. Conclusion: he wants to get back together, but still be able to fuck the entire world. FML

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2ndchoice - 12/12/2009 15:47 - Belgium

Today, my boyfriend wanted to tell me how much he loves me. He said a lot of wonderful things, such as not being able to live without me and hoping that I would want to live with him and marry him someday. He ended his loving speech with his ex-girlfriend's name instead of mine. FML

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Anonymous - 28/09/2010 20:42 - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend asked how long he'd have to wait until he could ask out my best friend. We broke up yesterday. FML

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Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

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Off the top of my head…

helplesslover - 04/10/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called and said he was stopping by to talk. I didn't understand why he would stop by, so I asked if he was going to break up with me, he said no. Half an hour later, he knocked on my door to break up with me. FML

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Crouching Tiger, Hidden Retard - 06/08/2013 21:55 - United States

Today, my apparently braindead and now ex-boyfriend asked me if "this period thing" is going to happen a lot, and said that if it is, "we're so done." FML

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Anonymous - 15/10/2010 17:15 - Nepal

Today, I texted my ex boyfriend that I still loved him. He texted back asking if this was some sort of booty call. FML

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LukeSkywalker - 23/12/2011 16:38 - United States

Today, after pouring my heart out to my girlfriend of four years through a speech that took me three weeks to write, and then proposing, she responded, "Eh, why not." FML

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Miki - 16/12/2012 23:57 - United States - Kenner

Today, after several years spent hung up on my ex, I was finally moving on. I was on a date with my new boyfriend when my ex walked past us. He broke down crying, got on his knees, and begged me to come back. FML

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Jessaly_fml 0

Monday 16 February 2009 20:28

... why do you love him, again?

jm88 0

Monday 16 February 2009 21:39

Yeah #8! Tell her how much you'd care for her more and she'd drop all her potentials for an FML stranger!

babex21 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 20:39

hahah aw ]:

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Friday 6 March 2009 22:07

that exact thing happened to me. EXACTLY. i then proceeded to kick him out of my house. hope you did the same

bizzles 0

Monday 16 March 2009 19:43

butthole much?

CapnObvious123 0

Monday 4 May 2009 15:18

Wow, makes me proud to be a guy... Not really. FYL

shaunaaaa 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 9:53

lol at #9 hope you didnt do it with him!

mandygirl578 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 4:17

He's not worth a minute of your time

pewhot1 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 2:31

I agree #19 I see people like that and I just want to kick their ass........ I'm 13 and I'm just disgusted with people like that:-)

Ub3r_Crippl3 0

Saturday 6 June 2009 4:04

WIN

xXlolololXx 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 8:13

HAHAHAHAH priceless. So uhhmm, did you do it?...

overachiever 0

Sunday 28 June 2009 22:43

I had a bf like that. It sucks, but you got to let it go.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my dad tried to help me overcome my intense fear of horses (due to nearly being killed by one as a child) by taking me to a ranch. Within 30 minutes, a horse bit my face. FML

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Today, I had the mother of a five year old come in for parent teacher conferences. When I told her that her son was very smart, but he often made up fantastical stories about his home life, she burst into tears. She then ran out of my office crying, "I knew it! I knew he was a sociopath!" FML

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Today, it was the day that I had been waiting for weeks to arrive: I finally finished the hiring process for my new job… Only to find out not only my paycheck, but the job itself was fake. Thanks Indeed, my first new bank account after years of debt, my disability, and my will to live greatly appreciate it. FML

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Today, I walked out of my house wearing only boxers, only to be greeted by kids with paintball guns. FML

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Today, I was at the park with my autistic son when I noticed a teenage girl imitating him by flapping her hands and walking on her toes. Fed up with children mocking my son, I went over and sternly lectured the girl's mother. Turns out, her daughter is autistic too and will be in my son's class. FML

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Today, I was shopping for socks and I went to look in the men's section. Dad said, "You don't want those, they're for men." I asked what the difference was. He looked around, and then leaned in and whispered, "Men have a penis." FML

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