Jailbird By Anonymous - 06/06/2026 09:00 - United States Today, I asked my foster parents to adopt me. They said no because my dad's getting out of prison soon. FML I agree, your life sucks 474 You deserved it 51 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML I agree, your life sucks 164 You deserved it 2 821
Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML I agree, your life sucks 135 059 You deserved it 80 717
Today, my boyfriend’s mom begged me to not leave him before we graduate. After that, I have her blessing. FML I agree, your life sucks 603 You deserved it 53
Today, I was babysitting, and after the kids fell asleep I started hiding the Easter candy. They woke up when I was half-done, and it didn't take them long to figure out what was going on. They won't stop crying, and every time I go near them, they scream "LIAR!" FML I agree, your life sucks 37 904 You deserved it 8 045
Today, while pensively thinking up my next awesome Facebook status over dinner, I finally came to the conclusion that I need to get a life. FML I agree, your life sucks 15 184 You deserved it 41 280
Today, I told my best friend I was breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years. He thought it would be funny to tell her I was going to propose to her that night. She showed up telling me how much she loves me and that when we get married how great it will be. FML I agree, your life sucks 38 181 You deserved it 7 117
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he "couldn't handle the distance." He said he "couldn't commit to driving to see me long term." We live two hours apart, and I've driven to him every time; he never tried to come to me once. FML I agree, your life sucks 904 You deserved it 161
Today, after I bought a bedframe a few days ago that was up for sale with a sign next to it that said "The best you can ever find! Very supportive and stable!" guess what happened? It shattered into small splinters. I’m literally underweight, too. FML I agree, your life sucks 607 You deserved it 145