Kids, Food, Creepy Work Freaked out - FML

Freaked out

radioinvader - 28/10/2012 12:29 - Canada - Kingston

Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down, laughing uncontrollably. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Reported

maximumpower - 15/03/2009 01:46 - United States

Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML

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Scary!

Heather - 03/02/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, I was at a restaurant when I made eye contact with a baby across the room. It smiled at me, so I smiled back. The baby immediately started screaming. Everyone stared at me like I'd just threatened it. FML

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FailureAtLife121 - 27/06/2009 03:44 - United States

Today, I was at Disneyland with some of my friends. While eating lunch, we watched a small child get frightened by the person dressed as Mickey Mouse. We all burst out laughing only to be jumped by Chip and Dale. Apparently I scream louder than the little kid. FML

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Anonymous - 01/10/2013 16:36 - United States - El Cajon

Today, a coworker at school yelled at one of our students to be quiet. The kid got pretty upset, so I went to comfort him. He held my hand for the rest of the class, telling me in vivid detail how he was going to kill my coworker. Now I'm afraid to look at him. FML

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oshitdonotwant - 08/08/2009 13:42 - United States

Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML

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godhatesme - 26/01/2009 23:14 - United States

Today, at work I got a message from some dude trying to flirt with me. While I was cracking up and making fun of him with my friends, I get a message from him saying look directly behind you, and there he was staring at me. FML

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Kinda sus

Anonymous - 15/12/2010 05:42 - United States

Today, my toddler stood up in a shopping cart and fell, giving himself a black eye. Later, while at a restaurant, he tried to stand up in his high-chair. I quickly blurted out, "Sit down! Do you want another one of those?" while pointing at his eye. The waiter wouldn’t stop glaring at me. FML

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Some kind of special

thatswhatsup66 - 20/03/2012 19:01 - United States - Greer

Today, I was at a restaurant, and I saw my friend. When we made eye contact, I made a creepy face at her and twitched my arms to make her laugh. A woman looked over said sadly, "Oh my God, that poor girl!" She thought I was "special." FML

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Mambo number 6

n/a - 25/11/2009 07:36 - United States

Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom, yelling, "Mommy! Mommy! That lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML

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OK Shaggy

Notakidpusher - 24/11/2015 03:34 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my coworker brought her 3-year-old son to work with her. When introducing him to me, she dropped her bag and bent over to pick it up, knocking him over with her butt in the process. When she stood up, she noticed he was sitting on the ground crying. She then accused me of pushing him over. FML

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brohamas16 7

Sunday 28 October 2012 15:51

Hah I'd make my kid do the same thing

Pleonasm 35

Sunday 28 October 2012 15:52

Slenderman: Origins

Albakuku 0

Sunday 28 October 2012 22:37

Love this!

tsent8 15

Monday 29 October 2012 0:53

Wow Scp containment breach much?

geekpower_fml 28

Monday 29 October 2012 1:12

Was he made out of stone?

P374RD3D 9

Monday 29 October 2012 1:38

And you posted it on FML? Sounds more like creepypasta.

DohIMissed 6

Monday 29 October 2012 1:48

He's just playing "Red light, green light". Have fun!

Pieman1001 1

Monday 29 October 2012 2:05

Soon...

draken555 0

Monday 29 October 2012 2:14

Can't really say ydi, but this is hardly fml.

Unicorn_Toes 4

Monday 29 October 2012 3:47

Slendy in his youngest form.

Liamj774 36

Monday 29 October 2012 4:08

() () ( •_• )

proudpan13 0

Monday 29 October 2012 4:20

Weeping Angels!

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I finally figured out that when a man says, "Maybe some other time, I'll be busy then" more than once, he really means, "I don't really want to see you again. I didn't think you'd actually USE my number." FML

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Today, my senile grandad saw me and thought I was cutting class, so he pulled his belt off and came after me. While I was trying to get away, his pants fell off and he tripped over them. I'm now getting the blame for "making him have a fall". FML

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Today, I spent five minutes trying to kill a spider with my mind. FML

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Today, I would rather pound to porn than have sex with my wife, because trying to get her in the mood is too much hassle. FML

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Today, I tried to hint to my husband that we needed a new washing machine. I mentioned that we got our current one way back on our wedding day. He replied, "Yeah, and I got you too." FML

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Today, Christmas changed my life. Last year I had a boyfriend to cuddle with on Christmas; this year I have a body pillow of an anime character. FML

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