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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Poopoo peepee

    How romantic

    By SmokedSalmon - 13/02/2009 00:54 - United States

    Today, I woke up next to a slumbering girl I had just met the night before. She had all the covers on top of her and I was cold. Not only was I cold, but the sheets were really cold. So I got up and realized she'd peed a drunken night's worth of beer all over my sheets. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 21 259
    You deserved it 43 611
    Share  

    Earthquake sneezer

    By Noname - 27/01/2009 00:02 - Japan

    Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 52 812
    You deserved it 2 832
    Share  

    By DonPedro - 16/01/2009 14:45 - United States

    Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 20 882
    You deserved it 11 416
    Share  

    Good boy

    By AgathedeBlouse - 18/11/2008 06:42 - France

    Today, as I do every morning, I woke up and gave my dog, who sleeps next to me, a kiss on the nose. Except that this morning he had been sleeping the other way round. I kissed him on the ass. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 27 582
    You deserved it 25 194
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    Keywords

    Miscellaneous Relatable Dogs Delivery Wake up Work Food Language Cooking Annoying Bikes Transportation Technology Embarrassing Intimacy NSFW Sex Awkward Kids Healthy Lifestyle Poopoo peepee Animals Cats Gross Video games Gamers Divorce Music Cars Growing old
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, my 11-year-old son and I took an IQ test for a laugh. To be honest, I've often suspected that I may have some form of mental retardation, but I didn't expect to get a score of 79, while he got one of 114. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 46 599
    You deserved it 7 553
    Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
    I agree, your life sucks 57 210
    You deserved it 3 623
    Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 12 537
    You deserved it 37 491
    Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML
    I agree, your life sucks 18 002
    You deserved it 39 938
    Today, after being supportive for nearly a year, my brother finally came out of the closet and introduced the family to his new boyfriend. His new boyfriend happens to be my ex-boyfriend. Guess I know why that didn't work out now. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 55 758
    You deserved it 4 616
    Today, I was in the hospital. My mom was with me and the pump was beeping for over two hours because everyone was busy with other patients. The Asian doctor came in and my mom said, “THESE PUMPS SOUND LIKE CHINESE TORTURE!“ He stared at her and was like, “Umm. We don’t actually do that there.” FML
    I agree, your life sucks 621
    You deserved it 156
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