App
FML for mobile
Free
Open in app
FMyLife

search

Categories

All
Random
Spicy
Nearly FMLs
The Top
FML - The Follow-Up

FML

Submit Moderate

Account

Log in
FMyLife FMyLife
Submit your FML Moderate the FMLs
Log in
All Random Spicy Random Spicy The Top FML - The Follow-Up Nearly FMLs
search
​

Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Healthy Lifestyle

    Irony at a base level

    By SterlingEnigma - 25/09/2009 08:43 - United States

    Today, I decided to start making healthier decisions. Instead of the usual cheeseburger I have for lunch I ate an apple instead. I took one bite and broke one of my teeth. Apparently, apples keep the doctor away, but not dentists. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 37 368
    You deserved it 7 392
    Share  

    Sexy time

    By Anonymous - 30/07/2009 09:23 - United States

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, I tried to be sexy and put a condom on with my mouth. Instead, I inhaled it and my boyfriend broke three of my ribs giving me the Heimlich maneuver. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 25 521
    You deserved it 59 476
    Share  
    • 4
    • 5
    • 6
    • 7
    FML on Facebook

    Keywords

    Awkward Work Coworkers Love Anniversary Divorce Transportation Cars Health Relatable Surgery Healthy Lifestyle Growing old Technology Money Ironic Embarrassing Animals Relationships Horses Jealousy Birds Miscellaneous Photography Mysterious Neighbours Cute I need your advice Clothes Family
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, my boss pulled me aside to chastise me for being "off task" because I was chatting with a co-worker while working on a project. She then spent a half hour chatting with the same person about what daycare she should go to for her new baby. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 24 914
    You deserved it 2 253
    Today, I was drinking from a water bottle while in a lecture. The water caught in my throat and it felt like I was choking to death. Instead of asking me if I was okay or trying to help, the guy sitting next to me told me to shut up. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 29 392
    You deserved it 6 473
    Today, I found out that pinching the tip of the condom before you roll it down to the base is NOT a suggestion. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 6 977
    You deserved it 26 532
    Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later came into the T-Mobile that I work at to return the Sidekick that I bought for her. I had to transfer her account to a new Iphone. She got the Iphone from her new boyfriend, who works across the street from me. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 68 949
    You deserved it 4 842
    Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and my teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 50 398
    You deserved it 13 564
    Today, after I got home from school I went to my room to find the maid had cleaned it, also to find a bag labeled "trash" it was all the sketches and paintings I had done in art class, which is my major plan for college. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 48 764
    You deserved it 4 701
    Download on the App Store Our app is now available on Google Play

    Even more FMLs

    • Nearly FMLs
    • Top FML
    • Random FMLs
    • Moderation
    • FML - The Follow-Up

    Useful links

    • FAQ
    • Contact us
    • Terms of use
    • The list of badges to find

    FML around the world

    • Français
    • English
    • Español
    • Deutsch
    • Italiano

    © VDM SAS, All rights reserved

    ​