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Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Frustration

    Gagging for it

    By Anonymous - 26/06/2011 21:42 - United States

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, I went on a third date with a guy, hoping I'd finally get some action. I got a high five. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 40 117
    You deserved it 10 638
    Share  

    Cover up

    By this_is_fucked - 24/10/2009 21:23 - Zimbabwe

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, I realized that I'm the only person in my house not getting any. My sister is sleeping with my ex. My roommate is sleeping with my brother, and my mom texted me, asking to make it look like she slept in her bed so that she didn't have to do the "walk of shame" in the morning. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 24 546
    You deserved it 2 928
    Share  
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    Keywords

    Bikes Transportation Annoying Technology Miscellaneous Embarrassing Relatable Intimacy NSFW Sex Kids Healthy Lifestyle Poopoo peepee Animals Cats Gross Music Cars Growing old Frustration Parents Parenting Shopping Awkward Food Family Bodyshaming Love Health Painful
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, I slept through my alarm because it was drowned out by humming. My humming, in my sleep. Even my body is against me waking up on time. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 27 919
    You deserved it 2 942
    Today, I received an urgent call from my son's nursery asking me to collect him, saying he was, "lethargic, complaining about being ill and crying". I get there and he's running around, playing and admits he just wanted to come home. They still made me take him home. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 31 885
    You deserved it 2 846
    Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We started going at it and we were both butt naked when I saw a car pull into the lot. Not only was it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asked my girlfriend was, "Are you being held against your will?" FML
    I agree, your life sucks 47 196
    You deserved it 14 417
    Today, I had to take a leak, so I went into a porta-john. I noticed another man's hand under the door with a cell phone. Angered, I aimed my stream at his hand and phone. He tilted the porta-john over in response. It was full. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 50 839
    You deserved it 23 386
    Today, I found out I was allergic to bees, the hard way, at my wedding. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 4 437
    You deserved it 246
    Today, I was starting my new job in the city. A man with a torn suit on came up to me and asks me for spare change. In a hurry to catch a taxi, I declined and rushed to catch one. At the office, my boss was late. About an hour later, I found out the man in the suit was my boss. He was attacked. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 2 056
    You deserved it 636
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