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Mood ruiner

RuinedTheMood - 21/09/2014 05:11 - United States - Tomball

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said, "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded, "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

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The BBQ Select - 13 FMLs About Your Favorite Labor Day Pastime and Everything That Can Go Wrong When Dealing with Fire

Nina - 04/09/2017 18:30 - France - Paris

Barbecues, America’s favorite Labor Day activity. The perfect way to unwind and profit from a day off work. So why do they so often cause us to have total meltdowns in front of those we love? It’s an FML mystery we don’t have an answer to, but love to laugh at anyway!

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- 27/01/2017 04:00

Today, someone sent a dick pic to my 16-year-old, lesbian daughter. She handed me her phone and asked, "What is that, a naked mole rat?" FML

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owwthatfarts - 27/01/2017 11:53 - United States - Worcester

Today, one of my preschool students hit me in the nuts in front of my whole class. If that wasn't bad enough, the blow to my crotch instantly triggered a very audible fart. FML

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stun_zeed - 17/01/2017 10:00

Today, my girlfriend called my flaccid penis her "little squishy" in a voice like Dory, and became upset when I got aroused because little squishy was gone. FML

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