offbeans - 17/02/2009 02:29 - United States Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML 267 601 90 939
Dasani - 16/02/2009 23:57 - United States Today, I was complaining to my mom about how my sister looked like a barbie doll next to me. I was saying how she was so tan and her hair looked awesome next to mine. She paused for a while and then said "Well you're pretty on the inside." FML 37 458 9 020
Good boy Ugh - 16/02/2009 05:45 - United States Today, I submitted my picture to a rating website. It was rejected because I didn't clarify which person I was. The picture was of my dog and me. FML 52 479 7 081