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TonkeyDoco

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Tonkeydoco's favorite FMLs

By anonymous - 01/10/2013 05:36 - United States - Huntington

Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML

agreeclassic 45 922

vote type 1 7 058

By Anonymous - 30/09/2013 23:54 - United Kingdom - Bathgate

Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my daughter trying to cut her wrist with a plastic spoon. When I asked her why, she said her friend Lucy did that so her parents would buy her pretty things. My daughter and Lucy are both four years old. FML

agreeclassic 50 193

vote type 1 3 776

By hairy - 30/09/2013 21:59 - United Kingdom - Guildford

Today, I discovered that I have caught head lice from my son. Unfortunately, they are living in my chest hair. FML

agreeclassic 40 417

vote type 1 3 841

Confused

By Overworked - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I realized how bad my insomnia had got when I tried answering my water bottle when my alarm went off. FML

agreeclassic 39 865

vote type 1 3 331