rimajaja

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Rimajaja's favorite FMLs

Wurdz is hard

By Holy Testacles - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression, "Knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as, "Kill yourself." FML

agreeclassic 31 194

vote type 1 7 971

By Anonymous - 11/12/2011 11:54 - Australia

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

agreeclassic 55 313

vote type 1 8 659

By wtf yourself, cunt - 17/09/2012 23:14 - Australia - Sydney

Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML

agreeclassic 30 604

vote type 1 2 816

By Anonymous - 06/10/2011 16:17 - Canada

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

agreeclassic 44 689

vote type 1 11 284

Chlamydia central

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Cloud

Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cotton swab shoved up my cock's piss-pipe. FML

agreeclassic 30 651

vote type 1 9 608