Intimacy: Today, I came back from breakfast to find I was locked out of... - FML

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By Banana_Lord - 19/05/2016 15:51 - United Kingdom - Dundee

Today, I came back from breakfast to find I was locked out of my dorm room. After panicking, getting yelled at by the RA for being irresponsible, and making myself late for class, I realized that I had been trying to get into the wrong room. Mine was unlocked the whole time. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, a girl I rejected, who is also a good friend, wrote on Facebook, “I’m never letting a guy get close to me again!” when I finally posted my new girlfriend. I avoided posting her before to avoid hurting her feelings because I knew she was still pining for me. Now I feel like an asshole and I lost a good friend. FML

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vote type 1 227

Today, I was at a wedding and I reluctantly joined the dance floor. As soon as I started dancing, I felt my trousers rip. Trying to save face, I kept dancing, hoping no one would notice. A few minutes later, I realized my silk boxer shorts were completely visible to the entire party. FML

agreeclassic 154

vote type 1 408

Today, I told my boyfriend of nine months that depression runs in my family and I think the reason I've been flipping shit so much lately may be that I am depressed. Not five minutes later he decided a break would be "the best thing for us right now." FML

agreeclassic 30 376

vote type 1 9 059

Today, I was talking to a group of friends about the various problems in Africa. One of them interrupts me and asks with a straight face, "If it's so bad over there, why don't they all just leave?" FML

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vote type 1 4 082

Today, I was on a long-haul flight, desperately trying to sleep. My husband next to me started snoring so loudly, I swear he was vibrating the seat. In a dazed, half-asleep state, I leaned over and hissed, “Shut up!” It wasn’t him. It was the guy next to him. He woke up and looked at me like I was the problem. FML

agreeclassic 186

vote type 1 464

Today, I noticed that my very expensive facial cleanser was almost out. I had moved in with my boyfriend recently, and questioned him, telling him "You don't have to use so much to wash your face. That's a $70 bottle." To which he responded, "Oh, that nice-smelling stuff? Yeah, I use that on my junk." FML

agreeclassic 45 813

vote type 1 8 667