Intimacy: Today, after my boyfriend decided to break things off because... - FML

Content almost refused by staff

By adventurous - 08/06/2016 04:13 - United States - Port Chester

Today, after my boyfriend decided to break things off because our relationship was "too hard for him to handle", he then went to one of my best friends, confessed his feelings for her and asked her to hookup to "channel his left over emotions for me". FML

agreeclassic 177

vote type 1 18

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. More…

Previous FML Next FML

TOP COMMENTS

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Top

Today, I was working out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML

agreeclassic 23 458

vote type 1 74 974

Today, I walked out halfway through a much anticipated dick appointment because it became apparent that he thought my clit was located somewhere on my upper thigh. He kept rubbing it and moaning, "Oooooh, I bet you like that, baby." No, sir, I certainly did not. FML

agreeclassic 1 667

vote type 1 300

Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML

agreeclassic 38 567

vote type 1 1 858

Today, I foolishly thought that I was alone in the house, and let out a huge fart on the toilet. This went on for a while due to an upset stomach. I later walked into the living room only to find my parents and a few of their friends sitting on the couch, teary-eyed from laughing so much. FML

agreeclassic 48 311

vote type 1 7 596

Today, I went to work only to serve one table, make a $9.00 tip, get sent home because it was slow, have the city busses stop running because of weather, and have to pay a $20 cab fare to get home. FML

agreeclassic 29 442

vote type 1 1 969

Today, I arrived at the airport two and a half hours early because I was expecting it to be busy. The line was long but I had plenty of time, until a woman complained about a fee for checked bags. I was next in line, and still managed to miss my flight because the woman caused such a big scene. FML

agreeclassic 1 560

vote type 1 118