Thanks, I hate it!
By poorkids - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Auburn
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
By poorkids - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Auburn
By Andrew - 30/10/2012 06:08 - United States - Monroe
By BusinessTurtle - 06/10/2012 07:49 - United States - Ames
By Anonymous - 17/10/2012 20:08 - United States - Hobart
By assholecat - 10/10/2012 08:43 - Australia - Brisbane
Hey y'all, this is OP. In regards to my post: The elderly lady is a very close family friend of my family who still lives by herself but is being taken care of by her family. She's a lovely lady, really. I'm not worried about her stealing my cat - her dead cat and my cat look very similar. If he's bringing her joy - great! She and kitty can hang as much as they want! To the people who seemed to hint at me not feeding my cat... if you ever saw him, you would know that he is probably the best fed cat in the whole world. He is enormous. I have perfectly good food for him to eat - which I would feed him if he turned up for meal times. I don't feed him whenever he's hungry because he's a big ol' fat cat and I don't want him getting any fatter. (He won't be getting breakfast from me anymore - when I found out that my neighbour was lovingly feeding my kitty for me in place of her own, I went and brought her some cat food.) In regards to the "your cat is an opportunist! That's what cats are!" comments - no argument from me. As far as "don't call your cat an asshole!" comments go... my cat is an asshole: he methodically waits by her door every single morning at the same time that she routinely feeds her own cat, even though he knows (I'm sure he does, simply because the other cat isn't there) that her cat is no longer with us. My cat is both an opportunist and an asshole. And no, I don't believe that my cat can understand me when I call him an asshole. Anywho, that's it. I'm out. Peace!
OP here, I've changed my locks and moved across town and I really don't want to hire a lawyer.